8 weeks pregnant with 4 month old

[forthelaughs]

Hi all,

First post here so go easy on me!

Found out I was pregnant 3 weeks ago (when I was 5 weeks) however we already have a 4 month old. Both pregnancies have been unplanned due to being irresponsible and careless! Our LO is the light of our lives but I just don't see how we would manage with another addition especially with our LO being so young. LO would have just turned 12 months when the new baby comes along... I'm really in two minds about progressing with the pregnancy or having a termination.

I guess what I'm trying to ask is, does anyone have any positive experiences with having 2 kids under the age of 2, or 2 kids who have a similar age gap? Unfortunately my mind automatically thinks about all the negatives which isn't great at all

I have 2 kids born exactly a year and 2 days apart, it was fine, I was even a single parent! If you have a partner then it will be fine.

I have known lots of families including family members with similar age gaps and it has been fine. In many ways it is easier than a longer age gap as the DC will do things together.

I had a 17 month age gap so not quite as close but still quite small. It was quite hard work at points but now they’re a bit older 3 and 4) it has so many advantages. Feel like I got all the baby stuff done in one swoop, they can go to similar activities, they play together lots and have similar toys etc. Also another advantage when they’re little is your oldest will probably still be napping when you have the newborn, I used to have my own nap while they both napped! If you want more than one child then I would just go for it, yeh it will be hard at points but it’ll be hard whenever you have a second just in different way depending on the age and their personalities etc

Big shock I bet hope your alright, it must be a really difficult place to be in right now, and you will have to look at what's best for you and your family. I know parents who have had the same issue and to be honest their child's relationship is just the strongest and cutest I have ever witnessed almost twin like.
I'm sure it will be difficult at times what ever you choose, but it's your body, your mind it's you going through it.

Hope it works out for you.
All the best
J x

I'm currently expecting baby no.2 in 3 weeks. Found out I was pregnant when little one was 11 months old, biggest shock of my life so I know how it feels it is very overwhelming it took a while to get used to the idea of having 2 under 2 and I am still trying to think about how I will cope with it all as my little one is at this toddler stage now and is into everything I can't take my eyes of him. But I have now got it in my head that I am getting it over and done with instead of starting again in a few years like I had planned. I wish you the best and hope everything works out ok x

My first 2, both unplanned (I was young and irresponsible) are 13 months apart. It was actually fine and in many ways easier than a larger gap. Yes, it was a bit of a blur for a few years, but I managed absolutely fine. I did have DH's family support but not all the time, just enough to keep me going. I'd say if you've got a partner and some supportive family it should not be a big deal. Though this will probably depend on how well they sleep, I was fairly lucky with mine!
I had my third with a 2.5 year gap after the second and found that harder as I had preschoolers and baby.

My Mum had 3 babies in three years. She doesn't remember much from back then.

I have 2 under 2! It’s hard but lovely. Never a dull moment! Probably end up with three under three to be honest as I was told to crack on by the consultant since as I age ill become extra high risk due to some health issues specific to pregnancy. To be honest the hardest thing really is monitoring the toddler with the baby , you want them to be able to touch and kiss the baby but that can turn into an eye poke very quickly😂

When DH was married to his ex, they had 3 under 2 . Adopted their first, then had two more within 18 months . He says it was manic for a few years, then suddenly everything got better. The three boys ended up being best mates and everyone survived ! Best wishes to you.

I had 2 in 14m. It will be absolutely fine op. You will love this new baby just as much as the first. Life with 2 close together is good fun. Hectic and nuts but good fun too. The first 6m is the hardest.
You'll give less shits about pretty much everything to get through it. And you'll come out the other side.

Congratulations x

Following as recently found out I am pregnant with no.2 (5 weeks) and DD is 9 months old next week. Complete shock as I was on contraception but there was no choice in my mind as had years of fertility issues trying to conceive DD. Feeling very apprehensive but also excited!

Following. My DS is nearly 11 months and I’m 8 weeks pregnant! Scared of how ill cope with two! Ive really struggled with my son in the early days due to reflux and milk allergy but now he’s older it’s become much easier. Terrified but I know when they are both a bit older it’ll be so worth it!

I’m dreading telling my work as I’ve only just returned from maternity leave!

My family member had two babys very close together. The 2nd was premature so there was only 8 months between them. She got all the baby stage put the way at one time. Napped when they napped. They love being in the same school year too and are the very best of friends. They are into all the same stuff and the same time too. Which is good for money really.

Thank you all! Some very nice messages have been left which I totally appreciate. A lot of things to consider. Another reason why I'm quite scared is because I had a terrible labour where one of the doctors punctured my spine and I ended up having 3 surgeries to fix this. I've since been left with life changing injuries because of this! I just don't want anything similar to happen this time round.

Again, a lot to think about but thank you so much for all the positives so far x

@Jode1990 Aw thank you so much! This message means a lot x

We have a 13 month gap. DD is now 15 months and DS is 2 months and it's the best decision we ever made! DD is too young to be jealous, and just loves on baby brother all the time! Financially makes sense to as we already had everything from DD so only had a few bits to buy!