5 year sibling age gap

[GemLooper]

Hi all. I have an only who will turn 5 three months after the next is due. I am now so worried that the age gap is too big and our family dynamic will be messed up for years (I.e finding activities both will enjoy). It's sucking the fun completely out of this pregnancy. Hoping some of you have positive stories of big age gaps? Help!

We have just under that. It’s absolutely fine so far but can still cart the baby around to wherever number one wants to go. I guess it might get trickier in time 🤷‍♀️ If there’s something specific to one of them we just divide and conquer but overall number two has been a lovely addition to our family. I wanted a 3 year gap but it didn’t happen and nothing I could have done about that!

We also have a 6 year gap in the family and they both get on suprisingly well too. It’s different to a sibling bond where they are close in age but not necessarily a bad thing! Definitely less competition and in our family the older ones really celebrate the little ones achievements- e.g. rolling / talking etc

My niece and nephew have this gap and it’s lovely. First child is at school for the maternity leave so second child gets a similar level of attention from parents. Yes, they like different things at different time, but they have fun as a family and enjoy the variety of activities they do. The children are very caring and close to each other and the older one fully understood the new baby and was helpful and past the manic behaviour of the toddler years. Relax and enjoy it.

By the time your first dc is too big to enjoy some of the stuff the second wants to do, there'll only be about a year before dc1 is just wanting to hang out with their friends on their own I have that gap, they still both enjoy things like swimming, climbing centres, trampolining, the cinema (though it is getting harder to choose a movie they both want to see). Congratulations OP, there are some challenges with any family arrangement but it is worth it to have your two lovely children.

A 5 year age gap can work really well just remember to save for the year they turn 16 and 21 simultaneously !!

I have 6.5 year age gap. I found the baby stage with the second not too bad and they did play together as they got older. The gap now with ds14 and ds nearly 21 is huge and although they get on very well they do very little together and ds14 finds this difficult. The age gap will lesson though again as they get older. I will admit things like seeing films etc is not easy with such a gap, however they do not have to do everything together and it is good to do separate things with them that reflect their ages when you can. I found it fab having an older one and had no jealousy issues at all when younger ds arrived.

Thanks all. This is exactly what I needed to hear. I just need to stop focusing on the negatives. I think I've just got too used to our family of 3!

@GemLooper

Hi all. I have an only who will turn 5 three months after the next is due. I am now so worried that the age gap is too big and our family dynamic will be messed up for years (I.e finding activities both will enjoy). It's sucking the fun completely out of this pregnancy. Hoping some of you have positive stories of big age gaps? Help!

Hi I have 3 daughters, 2 are teens with a 3 year gap between them. My youngest there is a 5 and a half year gap between her & my middle daughter, and a 9 year gap between eldest & youngest. My eldest & youngest ~ when the youngest was a baby the eldest made a big fuss of her. Now they're older she really doesn't bother with the youngest anymore unless she has to. My middle & youngest with the almost 6 year age gap, get on the best and are very close. They share a room so I'm sure that helps. Middle daughter even though she's a teen still plays games with the youngest. They do argue sometimes but that's normal for siblings but overall they have a lovely close relationship. She was the one who was a little jealous when her sister first arrived! So please do not worry there is nothing wrong with this age gap & the best of luck with everything!

My sister & I are 5 years apart, I don't think it's a massively big deal. We were close when we were very young but grew apart when I hit secondary school & she was like 6 years old, the age gap felt big then but we're older now and the age gap doesn't feel so significant at 25 & 30 and will probably mean even less when we're 55 & 60 etc! We've definitely gotten closer as we got older as she became less my annoying little sister when I was a teenager and is now someone I can share life advice & experience with.
But I don't imagine those teenage years foster great sibling relationships regardless of the age difference because it's probably a difficult time for everyone!
I don't remember us having difficulty finding activities to do for the whole family, most family friendly places are geared for kids of different ages anyway.

I am in exactly the same position! My little girl turns 5 two months after my second arrives. I’m not too worried - mostly grateful that she’s fairly self sufficient and will be settled into school while I’m busy with baby!

I have 9.5 years between my two and the gap is wonderful!!
It’ll be totally fine!

I’m overdue with number 2. Number 1 is 4.5 and I think the gap will be quite lovely. Number 1 has had loads of us time. She now has school and her own activities that she loves, which means she won’t be stuck at home with an annoying baby all the time… and I will get plenty of time with baby whilst she’s at school. As they get older, things might be trickier trying to fit their various activities… but there were 10 years between my sister and I and my mum said it was breezy, so I’m confident it will be ok!

4.5 year between my eldest and youngest hasn't changed days out dynamics just yet. Get on some days and argue like cat and dog the rest lol.

My sisters are 5 and 8 years older than me and we're all close, especially me and my middle sister. But we grew up in the 80's/ 90's where we were left to find our own entertainment lol

My second is due 2 months before my first 6th birthday and this thread has been very reassuring to me to thank you all!