Sonographer called the baby “HE” & “HIS”

[Trustynickname]

Hey all

I have got too 34+5 weeks without knowing the gender, it has been tough and I have been curious but I am excited for the surprise.

I had a growth scan today & the lady asked me if I am having a surprise I said yes and she told me too look away when she was looking at the legs.

Straight after the scan she said come and have a look at “his” growth & then she continued to say “he” is growing well etc.

Did she slip up?! Do you think! Or is this something others have experienced? Is it just a phrase. She wasn’t calling them he before the scan so I feel like my surprise has gone out the window lol.

Opinions please x

I knew what I was having, and the lady doing my scan still referred to him as “Baby” the entire time, apart from when we talked about the fact I knew he was a boy.
(Like “And here you can see Baby’s spine which is a good size and next we will look at Baby’s kidneys and bladder”)

I think she must talk like that automatically now to avoid accidentally ruining anybody’s surprise. Must be a lot of pressure on them, I’d hate to accidentally give something away.

But a lot of people do use “he” automatically so I wouldn’t read into it. It’s gonna be one or the other!

Unfortunately it may just be a generic term rather than actually giving away the gender :) At our 12 NHS scan and another private scan, the sonographer referred to the baby as he and his, even though both scans were too early for the gender (and turned out we were having a girl anyway at a later scan). A little misogynistic, but seems to just be easier and I guess a nicer way for them to refer to baby rather than 'it'.

I think some people use he/him as a default so I’d be more worried that they’d spoiled it if they’d said she/her.
Though saying that my sonographer said he/him and it did turn out to be a boy. So don’t know if that was a slip or her just using it as a default.

My best friend was told by the sonographer that they use "he/his" as default if they're not finding out. so i wouldn't read too much into it

My sonographer said 'she' and in a such a way I was convinced it was a girl. He's a boy :-)
I've heard some sonographers always stick with 'him' or 'her' etc so as never to slip up!

@driftcompatible

Was the scan ok? The baby is fine? Measuring ok? The sonographer said 'he' not 'no heart beat'. Who cares he/she/they. It's sex btw not gender. The job of the sonographer is not to protect your 'surprise' but to monitor the health of the baby.

Get a grip

First pregnancy we didn't know what we were having and sonographer referred to baby as a 'he'. I had a DS. We are having a girl this time and sonographer also referred to baby as a 'he' at growth scan.

@driftcompatible

Was the scan ok? The baby is fine? Measuring ok? The sonographer said 'he' not 'no heart beat'. Who cares he/she/they. It's sex btw not gender. The job of the sonographer is not to protect your 'surprise' but to monitor the health of the baby.

Omg, she's allowed to feel upset if she wants the gender a secret. Pretty sure if something was wrong with the baby she wouldn't have focused on that ..

Poor bloody sonographer. As if doing the job wasn’t challenging enough, she (or he!) also needs to spend time thinking about the risks of using default pronouns, lest they be denounced by expectant parents for “ruining the surprise”!

• expectinglittlebear

Unfortunately it may just be a generic term rather than actually giving away the gender smile At our 12 NHS scan and another private scan, the sonographer referred to the baby as he and his, even though both scans were too early for the gender (and turned out we were having a girl anyway at a later scan). A little misogynistic, but seems to just be easier and I guess a nicer way for them to refer to baby rather than 'it'.*

Off topic
I don’t think it’s misogynistic. It could well be because they avoided implying it was a girl because in some communities there’s a higher rate of abortions when finding out it’s a girl.

(My reply is off topic, not yours @expectinglittlebear, in case I wasn’t clear. Too tired!)

The sonographer we had at the 12 week scan said "he" and I assumed it was because they didn't want to say "it", especially because the maternity handouts I've been given also refer to the baby as "he" and a few books I've read too, I think they just don't want to say "it".

@bangingbins

Not the same but when I comment on animals I see I always use he/fella. Unless it's a dog with a pink collar or obvious balls or teets

That's like 'cowboys' calling cattle 'cows' when they are bullocks.

Thanks all

I really don't think they slip up like this. It's asked all the time by people and sonographers just just a pronoun politely.

At my 20 week scan the sonography referred to my baby as ‘he’ all the way through.
She’s most definitely not a ‘he’ and I knew this way before my scan.