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Terrified - how do I move on?

1 reply

Struggling217 · 07/09/2021 15:57

I posted a few days ago about how my toddler and I (38w pregnant) fell into a river. The messages really helped and I felt better for a few days but am spiralling again.

I have convinced myself that I probably contracted Weil's disease in the water and that there will be devastating effects on my unborn baby.

I spoke to the GP and midwife who was going to speak to the consultant today to see if we needed to do anything (blood test, preventive antibiotics, extra monitoring).

She said If I didn't hear from her today to assume it's fine. I haven't heard anything so I guess they decided it was rare enough in the UK not to worry.

But now I know it is a risk, no matter how small, I can't move on. I probably spent 3 or 4 hours online today reading the research, medical papers, even calling the environmental agency to try to establish the risks in this particular river. Of course noone has answers and it didn't reassure me, just fuelled my anxiety more (e.g. there are more cases in September, you're more at risk if you get fully immersed - I did, or if you have uncovered grazes - I got out covered in cuts and grazes from brambles in the water).

What should I do? Push for more help, or trust it's fine and let it go? If so, how?

I know this state of mind isn't healthy at all. Beside Googling, all I did today was watch TV and nap on and off. I couldn't master any motivation for anything else, which is completely unlike me.

I wish I could turn back time and never have gone out for a walk that day. I was so blissfully happy before.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Welshcake15 · 07/09/2021 16:31

Speak to your midwife and let them know how you've been feeling. I was the same way after a traumatic birth experience (hours a day Googling pelvic deformities that may have prevented a natural birth - that wasn't the case in my situation anyway - to other such bizzare things to try and get it to all make sense in my mind) and should have spoken to someone about it sooner than I did. I think it probably would help to get the reassurance from your midwife that you will be physically fine from the fall in the river, but also some help with your mental health with what sounds like it was an incredibly traumatic experience. xxx

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