Leaving partner when pregnant

[DaisyDoo2222]

Hi! Just a bit of context, I have a 5 year old and one little boy on the way. My partner and I have never had any big issues in our relationship apart from his drinking. When he's had a drink he can't stop and even though he promises me he won't stay out until early hours and get paraletic he still does. It's been an ongoing issue, quite frankly it's embarrassing how he acts and with another incident this week I've decided enough is enough and I'm going to call it quits between us. It's a really hard decision as I've thought about it before but always thought we could work through it but I've realised it's just not possible and he'll never change. Has anyone else been single and pregnant, or single and with a newborn and a child? I'm petrified but don't want to be too scared I put it off and then deplete my own self worth. I want my children to grow up in a happy home and they won't if I stay. Reassurance needed

Well done on making the decision to leave him to it and prioritise yourself and your young family.

If he chooses to keep the heavy drinking up over his family, he has made his choice. It is a horrible addition and will keep whittling away at his health, safety and dignity.

If you haven’t already, I would make an appointment to speak with your GP about it, as s/he can provide insight and support.

Best decision many women ever made was leaving an alcoholic

*addiction

No advice, but we’ll done on making a decision that will improve your children’s life. 💐

You are braver than me. I should have left earlier but in the end stayed until ds was 3.
Just take one day at a time. Deal with each issue as it comes along and have faith in your abilities. I've managed to work full time and buy us a home by myself.
Harder with two but it can be done.

You have made the best decision possible. You need to get yourself and your children away from this alcoholic. Well done.

My ex left when I was 9 weeks pregnant. We also had a 7 year old. He had left before- drank heavily and also gambled. It wasn’t easy, I can’t pretend it was, especially as I also worked full time as well. You can do this though. I used to imagine coping with the children and having to cope with him. With DD1 I would be waiting up for the key in the door, watching him stagger around, wetting himself, shouting, blacking out, realising all the money was gone, never knowing where he was. It was so stressful. Doing it alone involved challenges that are sometimes terrifying but you can do this. Be kind to yourself, try and take all the help offered, do not beat yourself up! My eldest remembers me feeding in the car whilst she was at clubs, watching her sister whilst I showered, all 3 of us tucked up in my bed with a film; you just do it your way. I know it’s scary but not as scary as staying with an addict. My ex has been in and out of their lives and has been a dreadful dad but his influence has been minimised by us being apart. Wishing you all the luck in the world 💐

Well done, OP. I was single and pregnant. In my case, my ex was so toxic, I always considered myself to be very lucky to separated from him.

I don't have words of wisdom, only of support. Women are strong, we're just told regularly that we're not. You can do it, not easy but the right thing often isn't.... your children will be better for it, you will be better for it. You can do it.