Feel very low and anxious..23 weeks pregnant

[Rosa607]

I’m 23 weeks pregnant with my second child and I feel so different this pregnancy. I feel like my hormones are unbalanced or something as I have terrible acne (worse than when I was a teenager) and am alternating between feeling depressed or extremely anxious. First pregnancy I was glowing, happy, lovely skin etc!

Obviously this time I have a toddler to look after so I think part of it is exhaustion. My daughter is amazing but has been a terrible sleeper from day one and still wakes often at 17 months. We cosleep but sleep still feels very broken.

I think lockdown / covid etc probably making it worse as I gave birth to first daughter just before lockdown so it’s all been a bit of a strange experience. I feel really lonely but feel like I’ve lost my confidence to go and meet new people...I work from home still all the time so don’t get much interaction except with family. Most of my friends don’t have kids so I feel we’re not really on the same page at the moment and I actually feel hesitant to meet up as I feel they just think I’m so boring now! My self esteem is on the floor..I feel bad about my marriage also but I can’t tell if that’s because I’m depressed or if it’s making me depressed so obviously not going to do anything hasty.

I don’t feel negative about baby 2 at all I still very much want the baby, I feel more negative about myself and I think just part lonely part overwhelmed and shattered. Feel mega run down too and have picked up every bug there is (except covid!).

Sorry a long rant...I just can’t seem to snap out of it and don’t know what to do. I’m already seeing a therapist but don’t feel like it’s helping and I wouldn’t take antidepressants while pregnant so don’t see the point in telling midwife etc. Anyone else feeling or felt similar? I’m praying it gets better after baby 2 arrives..

Sorry to hear you feel this way. I think it's very understandable, hormones can have such an effect on mood and the pandemic is just adding a whole other layer. Lack of sleep and viruses also don't help!

I don't have much advice but you're not alone, I breezed through my first pregñancy and this time im having to work hard to keep my anxiety in check. Im working from home and not doing much to avoid covid risks and I think that gives me so much time to worry and overthink everything and be negative. Not a lot of distractions!

I think it would still be worth talking to your midwife they may suggest a referral to the perinatal mental health team, a few ladies on here have found them helpful.

And keep talking on here when you need to. I can also guarantee your friends don't think you are boring, how about you reach out to one of them to start? I always feel like this when tired and get paranoid noone likes me, but it's 100% not true I promise!

Just start with little steps, I also find being sociable takes some getting used to again after the year we have had. All perfectly normal !

Thanks for the lovely reply @Helpamummy. I think you hit the nail on the head about having too much time to overthink things! This has always been my problem even without pregnancy hormones..always better when I’m busier.

I can also relate to what you said about being out of practice socialising. I’ve been desperate to see friends through lockdowns etc but now that we’re allowed I’ve felt strangely nervous about it! I know I’m being daft and once I meet up I’ll wonder what I worried about though.

I feel a bit brighter today but last night was one of those days where you just can’t see any positives! I always find it’s worse at night but I think again that’s because you have time to think (overthink!). I’ve been looking at a pregnancy yoga class to try and meet some new mum / mum to be friends..think I just need to stop being a hermit!

I hope you’re feeling ok with your anxiety too..it’s such a weird time I think it’s easy to forget the impact of the last 1.5 years.

yes I found this, you are not alone. yoga and pilates has helped me so much. would highly recommend The Yoga Class, www.theyogaclass.co which has a great selection of Yoga Pilates and Meditations for Pregnancy

Hope this helps x