4 weeks, how did you all cope with the worry?

[Cheekymonkey3112]

Hey gals,

Hope you are all well. I found out I was preg last week and I am 4 weeks tomorrow. This is DC#2. I conceived DC#1 after 12 months and 1 MMC and 2 MC.

I am absolutely sick with worry until I get a scan to confirm a heartbeat (even then I know it doesn't mean a take home baby 😢) but it is literally over one hurdle and on to the next.

How do you cope with the worry? Make the days go faster? And try not to worry?

I know no matter what I do it won't change any negative outcome but I am literally living my life on edge 😢

Thanks x

@Cheekymonkey3112 firstly congratulations I am also 4 weeks after two early missed miscarriages. I was pregnant in April lost in may again pregnant in may lost in June & here we are now in April & pregnant again I'm hoping it's 3rd time lucky. This pregnancy has already progressed further than the other two so I'm feeling hopeful so far. I just take each day as it comes. The symptoms are reassuring. Do you have any symptoms ? Have you been to the eupd or gyny assessment unit? I have been having hcg levels first lot was last Sunday & they was 188 then I had a repeat on Tuesday & they was 650 the gyny has booked me an early scan for Monday just to check everything is in the right place. From my bleed I had after the miscarriage I am dating 4 weeks & 2 days but they feel my levels are a little high so could be further we just don't know. I don't have advice about the worry as I am on edge constantly myself every ache or pain. I do wish you all the best try & get seen for reassurance x

@Shakira1111 thanks for the reply 😘 I had early reassurance scans with my son but don't think I'd qualify now as I've had a child in between the MC. I will pay privately for a scan at 6weeks to see what's happening but that is still 2 weeks away.

I don't have many symptoms, I had some cramping which has eased now and I maybe pee a little more often but I have been really thirsty (heat or pregnancy I don't know) so that could maybe explain thst. I don't have sore boobs or anything. What about you? X

I think you just have to take each day as it comes and keep telling yourself, 'today I am pregnant.' It took us 2 years to conceive our third with no hint of a bfp in all that time. I am also 40 now so know this pregnancy is absolutely our last chance of having our much wanted third child. I was terrified from day 1 that something would snatch it all away from me but it really is just a case of trying to stay positive and hope for the best. I was lucky to get HCG tests from the doctors at around 5 weeks that showed things were progressing and due to a small bleed a scan at 6 weeks which showed a heartbeat. I then booked a private scan at 9 weeks to split up the wait until the 12 week scan. It is hard knowing that at any moment it can all be snatched away and I'm still struggling to accept it will be ok even now at 18 weeks. But each day it becomes a little more real, just don't look into the future too much and try and live in the here and now. Good luck and hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy x

@burtle4 thank you so much, yep you're right. I think taking each day as it comes is the way forward. I'm trying to keep myself busy but the negative doubt keeps creeping in. I will need to continue to distract myself 🤞 the weeks go by fast but the days drag in🤣

I wish you a healthy happy pregnancy too, when are you due? Do you know what you're having? 💕💙 x

@Cheekymonkey3112 so from last week I was extremely tired I never sleep during day & was having naps in the afternoon. I then got a really syringe metallic taste in my mouth, cramps & sense of smell is out of this world. I have sore & enlarged boobs aswell now. Woke up this morning with slight sickness feeling but not been sick. I do think you should still qualify or a reassurance scan as they take each pregnancy different. Just explain your anxiety try ring your local hospital & ask to be put through gyny assessment unit x

@Cheekymonkey3112 due just before Christmas! Counting down the days until our 20 week scan in just over a week where we'll find out what we're having, feeling like it's a boy though! My latest worry has been not feeling movements yet and I managed to keep myself awake with it last night. But this morning I started feeling a good few wriggles so it just goes to show all the worrying is pointless 😂

Hi @Cheekymonkey3112, congratulations on your pregnancy :)

For me being an 'older FTM' and having spent 2 years ttc, I was also a little worried during those first few weeks, I was just trying to take every day as it came.

However I do have some advice on the scan. You mentioned that you may pay for a private scan at 6 weeks for reassurance ... can I suggest waiting at least 7 weeks, 8 weeks if you can? Only I had an early scan at 6 weeks only to see a completely empty gestation sac. At the time I was pretty heartbroken, and I had another worrisome 2 week wait for a second scan to see if anything had progressed. To my absolute delight after 8 weeks I went back and saw the heartbeat, limb buds and it even did a little wiggle. I'm now 17 weeks :)

My point really is that I wouldn't wish those 2 weeks worry and feeling like I was in limbo on anybody. Different pregnancies can start by progressing at different rates and all the research I found on the subject since suggests waiting until at least 7 weeks to avoid any unnecessary worry.

Wishing you a happy healthy pregnancy! :)

Congratulations!

I had a mmc after seeing a heartbeat in my first pregnancy. When I fell pregnant with my daughter, I can't say that I ever truly relaxed. The first 12 weeks were so hard and I had a panic attack twice that I thought I'd had another mmc. I tried the "today I am pregnant" mantra and tried to remind myself that it was a different pregnancy. Basically, I just counted the days down in a fog of morning sickness.

@Shakira1111 yeh those symptoms sound really promising!!

@burtle4 a Christmas baby is exciting! I had a gut feeling DS was a boy and he was 🤪 glad you felt movement, that's super early to feel something is it not? Fab news!!

@jojojo82 oh god yeah that is worrying. Glad everything was OK with your bub. My thinking was that I'm working out due date/weeks based on my ovulation date (which was confirmed by bbt and opk) not based on my LMP according to that I'm 5.5 weeks at the moment. So by the time I scan I'll be 6w2d according to ovulation, and 7w2d according to LMP. Thanks for the advice though, I will really try and hold off if I can 😭🤞 xx

@chanel05 yeh its so so worrying!! Thats the thing isn't it, you start to want MS for a hint that everything is OK 🤯😳

I'm trying to tell myself that I'm blessed to have one gorgeous boy so another is a bonus so as not to be upset (as if!!) If anything negative happens. Take each day as it.comes and enjoying being pregnant for however long it will be (hopefully a healthy, happy 9 months!) ❤