TTC after late miscarriage - recovery?

[Amy2302]

Hi all. I'm only 6 days after being told I lost my 16 week old boy via ultrasound scan and only 3 days after giving birth to him. I'm just wondering if anyone had any advise about how long my cervix will take to go back to normal after dilation during Labour, how long my uterus will take to shrink back to normal size and when I could start to track ovulation again?

I know I should really wait and have 1 cycle/period first before TTC and I think I will, but I'd like to at least use ovulation strips pre- my first period and see if I do ovulate. It gives me something to focus on and something to track.

I think I'm still in shock and disbelief also so waiting 1 cycle is definitely advisable for me. Thank you xxx

@Amy2302
So sorry you have went through that, I have had 4 miscarriages and 1 cp latest being 10+5 so no where as bad as yours doc always told me as long as your still bleeding your cervix is still open so was advised not to have sex until the bleeding stopped 💚

@Amy2302 firstly I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost twins at 16 wks last July in a very similar way to you.
I just wanted to say do what you feel ready to do but being pregnant again comes with a lot of anxiety and worry and you need to give yourself time to grieve for your son.
I am currently nearly 34 wks and I still struggle at scans etc. I am getting support for my mental health and have been really lucky with my care. I hope you get the same when you feel ready

Sorry for both your losses 💖💙 wish no one ever had to go through it. Thanks for your replies, I'm surprised that the bleeding has really subsided today so I'll keep an eye on it. I know the doctor said I'd be fertile as soon as 2/3 weeks but most places I've read it says wait at least 1 cycle so I will defo do that. You're absolutely right about grieving properly, I go between desperately wanting to BE pregnant again to thinking jeezo, if I did get pregnant the innocence and excitement is completely robbed and I'd just be anxious and detached for months and months yknow? So strange. I know I won't replace my wee boy, ever. My sis in law is 10 days ahead of me and I'll be so so gutted if im not pregnant when our due dates come along - prob silly I know but it's just how im feeling. Seeing her is going to be so triggering for me but I am over the moon for her still. Xx

Hi @Amy2302 I’m so sorry for your loss, it’s such a difficult thing to go through. I lost a baby at 13 weeks last October and also remember feeling like my baby couldn’t be replaced but also wanting to be pregnant again by a certain date. I ended up conceiving again in Feb and I’m currently 25 weeks. Looking back I think it was for the best that it took a bit of time so that I could properly recover. I was pretty nervous until I had a 16 week scan then I felt I could enjoy it fully. I still get loads of joy out of hitting new milestones and hopefully you’ll feel the same in your next pregnancy

Hi OP,

I'm so sorry for your loss

It's really down to you. When I had a miscarriage I ovulated 10 days after the bleeding stopped, and 'went for it', and conceived my baby, who arrived full term, safe and sound. Because I conceived so quickly afterwards I didn't really have time to grieve, and I focussed everything into that pregnancy. That worked for me, but I'll admit when covid hit when I was 3/4 months pregnancy my anxiety went through the roof and it still hasn't gone away when it comes to my little ones safety.

It's a very personal decision; there's no right or wrong. See how you feel, and if it feels right for you, then go for it. Wishing you all the best x

I realise this is an older post but felt it was worth posting. Op so sorry for your loss. I recently went through the loss of my son at 15 weeks & 5 days. I had Labour induced and delivered naturally.
I’ve also had a missed misscarriage at 8 weeks back in November 2020.
Has anyone experienced two mc (an early and then late one) and then went on to have a healthy live birth.
It may also be worth noting I have a healthy 2 year old which was my first ever pregnancy and then suffered the two losses afterwards.
Thank u x

@KeepingHope21 it’s absolutely possible to have a healthy baby after an early and then a late loss I had a MMC at 12 weeks and then lost my daughter at 20 weeks. I then went on to have a healthy baby who is now 5. Keep hope - it’s horrendous losing a baby late on and it will always be with you but it doe get easier xx.

@Honey2 thank you so much for your reply. Did you ever find a reason for either of your miscarriages? It’s so reassuring to hear your story. Your right it is horrendous and although I’ve a brill support system and dealing with it a lot better now, I still know it will never leave me. So so sorry for your losses and delighted that u managed to go on to have a healthy baby xx

@KeepingHope21 unfortunately they didn’t find anything. That said I received fantastic care with my next pregnancy lots of extra scans and consultant led care. I also had counselling to help with the anxiety. Sending big hugs xx