Managing stress in pregnancy

[yellowbaglady]

I am finding being pregnant quite overwhelming at times. I am 25 weeks and have 2 older children.
This week has been particularly bad, I have tummy troubles a bit like IBS and they have kicked off big time. I can't take any of the usual medication so I am just trying to get through the pain the best I can. I know it will pass in a few days which is all that is keeping me going.

My dd started a new school yesterday to try and accommodate her severe anxiety. It has taken years of fighting to get this place, today she is stuck in bed with crippling period pain which hasn't budged, even with Ibuprofen. I am waiting for a call from my GP to try and get better pain relief for her but feel so deflated that she has already missed a day. I don't want to lose this place in the school as I say it has taken a huge battle to secure it.

The house is a shit tip, I have no energy to keep on top of it, it's my son's birthday in a few days time and I have nothing for him. I feel totally unprepared but don't know where I am going to summon the time or energy to go out and buy some bits. (could order online but not sure they will arrive on time)

I am finding my job quite overwhelming. I am WFH so I can pace myself to a certain degree and take breaks when I need to but I am really bored, finding it hard to focus and prioritise my work. We are really busy and everything feels of equal importance so I am constantly treading water to just try and stay on top of everything.

I could really do with some time off from work but we are a tiny team and only allowed 2 people on AL at 1 time and the next few weeks are fully booked by other people.
To top it off the heat is killing me, I feel so meh and defeated by it all. I want to cry but I don't have the energy.

Hello my love, this sounds like a lot! Firstly, I can relate on the WFH, house being a mess bit. I'm just over 23 weeks with my first and finding fairly simple things very overwhelming. I don't have anywhere near as much on my plate as you do.

You:

1. Can you take a mental health day, just to get yourself a bit of calm for a moment? A sick day?
2. The house being a tip - are there any obvious smaller things you can do, just for now? I find clearing a few of the surfaces (dining table, kitchen side, bedside table) goes a long way to making everything feel a bit more under control, at least in an emergency. That's what I'm going to do today.
3. Work - are you making lists and then prioritising them where possible? You might find not everything needs to be done first, it just feels that way. Break each thing down as much as possible and cross things off for a little hit of satisfaction/relief. Cut yourself some slack. Being pregnant is fucking hard and you're allowed to not be at your absolute most efficient.
4. We all kind of hate Amazon, but Prime is amazing in emergencies. If it doesn't make you feel too annoyed to use them, get a free trial of Prime going and order a few bits. Don't forget wrapping paper. They'll all be here tomorrow.
5. If you need to, have a big cry! It sometimes helps.

Your DD: Can you get any Feminax MAX (not Express, that's just ibuprofen) or off brand Naproxen? I have always had horrendous period pain (from when I first got mine 18 years ago!) and Naproxen has been the only thing that has ever touched it. As for her losing her place in school, I think this is extenuating circumstances and will fight anyone who says it isn't. She's ill and in pain.

Really feel you on the heat, it's just making everything harder I think. I'm not sleeping and that makes me feel more overwhelmed. I've been putting damp flannels in a tupperware in the fridge and then putting them over the back of my neck when it just gets too much. Make sure you're drinking enough water and having enough snacks. If I'm even slightly parched or hungry I just burst into tears.

Anyway, sending you a big hug. Sorry if suggestions are a bit basic, but when I'm in a flap I just need to remember the basics. x

Highly recommend taking some time off sick in this situation, pregnancy can be tough and it’s important to have time to rest.

Thank you for your nice messages, they made me cry in a good way. My boyfriend just turned up with a massive new swanky fan so I am hoping this will help at least cool me down. He's also told me to bugger off (in a nice way) and is attacking the kitchen, I might sit and fold the washing and then at least the kitchen dining room would be clear. It just all feels a bit like whats the point. It will be a pigsty again later, but i guess I need to stop thinking like that.

My dd has perked up a bit now and the GP has prescribed her some meds so thats something at least. She has made a list of stuff we still need to get for her brother and has offered to run into the shop tomorrow evening to pick it up for me and has also said she will wrap it all for me. I just need to do a click and collect order.
The school were really nice and put my mind at ease so hopefully tomorrow we can get her back in.

Just feel like I am trying to spin plates and they are all smashing around me.
I am going to go out for some fresh air now and then return to work. Hopefully getting out of the house will lift my mood a bit.

Thank you for the tips. I think I do need to remember the basics. I haven't eaten anything today which is bound to make me feel poop. I have totally lost my apatite since getting pregnant. Might treat myself to something yummy whilst I pop out. I think I need to speak to my boss too and take a day off this week.

Just to top today off, the toilet has blocked. My teenagers think it is hilarious- they are the culprits. I started out laughing, now I am crying. I am totally done in. I haven't cooked dinner so suggested we grab mcdonnals, they won't put their devices down so I am just sat on the bed crying because inevitably come bedtime they will moan that they are hungry and I am not cooking

Our only toilet is unusable and now resembles hot poo soup. vom! It stinks and I can't stop retching. I hate today!