Sister has nothing nice to say about my pregnancy!

[ruva]

Hi ladies
My sister has two kids, when i was going through fertility tests she was very dismisive saying you don't need children to be complete, Because i drank ,she always said i would have rotten children. when i was about to go through ivf she was very unsupportive. Luckily i fell pregnant just before starting my ivf cycle she never said congrats. When i told her i had placenta praevia she said nasty things like you are too skinny and you don't eat enough, you should eat meat( iam vegetarian) for the sake of your child. I told her that i was having a boy and she said statistics says boys die more. she is just so unpleasant , i am thinking of not talking to her until my baby is born, she lives in africa so that should be easy.She says she regrets having children she should have concentrated on her career.

Oh dear. At least she's a long way away and you don't have to hear this on a daily basis. I'm sure she'd have had some regrets if she hadn't had children and just concentrated on her career.

Congratulations and ignore the comments. You'll hear so many - good and bad - over the next few years.

Bloody hell - is she normally so negative or is it just over pregnancy/children. I would. avoid her

oh my god! how awful. please dont listen to this awful woman, congratulations, your son is very lucky to have a mummy who will obviously love him so much!

Why are you even bothering with this woman? Cut her off - the unpleasant bint

it sounds like her experiences are clouding what she says to you. maybe she is jealous because you are a maternal person and are doing it well?

Ignore her, you don't need that 'advice'.

Congratulations on your pregnancy. I'd ignore your sister - she obviously has some kind of issues with pregnancy/children but thats no excuse to be saying such horrible things to you. I'd try and spend time with people who are happy for you and supportive and try not to listen to her. For what its worth I had fertility issues, I drank (before pregnancy), I am vegetarian and and now have a beautiful healthy little boy - so she's talking rubbish.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Your sister sounds like she has big problems and could well be jealous of your choices and how well things are working out for you.

I hope the rest of your family are happy and supportive of you. You don't need her though - she is too far away to rely on anyway so just ignore her.

Thank you ladies, i am actually crying for your words of encouragement and support, when i told her lovely kids i was having a baby they said i would not love them, as they have been coming from sweden every summer to spend it with me (their papa is swedish) They have have always travelled alone without their mom three times a year to sweden from africa since they were babies now 13 and 15, I assured them this baby won't change a thing but i will also have babysitters and i am the luckiest aunt on this earth!
Thank you.

to put it bluntly, tell her to piss off if she can't be supportive.

the last thing you need is someone heaping all this negative nonsense on you, pregnancy is scary enough anyway.

don't feel any obligation just because she's your sister, if she is going to behave like a witch then how can she expect you to want to chat???

she sounds pretty bitter about her own life, and is taking it out on you.

take care of yourself and talk to people who want to give you the love and support you deserve

Hi ladies,
Thinking about it, we are six girls and everytime she picks on one of us to be nasty to and will go on for a year or so not talking to them.
Yes i am going to ignore her.

Message withdrawn

IGNORE, IGNORE, IGNORE her.

Pregnancy is a lovely (albeit tiring and emotional time). Get into your lovely pregnancy bubble and cold turkey cut anyone off who tries to burst it.

Blimey! It sounds the distance between you is a bonus! What a character! If this was my sister, I'd ask her if she was ok, as all this negativity she is giving me/you isn't so pleasent.. she has the issues not you! and if she was still 'funny' I would ignore her words and like you say focus on her children in a continuing positive light.

Lucky you to be over in Sweden

Ignore her (easier said than done, I know). Concentrate on your little boy and your niece and nephew!

She sounds like ike an extremely bitter, unhappy person who doesn't like to see others happy. Perhaps you should limit your contact with her - not cut her off completely, but limit it to when you are feeling strong enough to ignore her negativity and steer the conversation into nicer territory. Really, though - you don't need to be putting up with this, especially not after having fertility treatment and I bet going through heartache to get this far.