Panic attacks in pregnancy

[99redspottedducks]

My pregnancy has been not great multiple problems in and out of hospital
I have a appointment in just over a week to discuss delivery
I want a c section they are going to disagree
I think I've hit the point I don't want to do this anymore
I don't want to give birth
I want my baby but magically no labour no birth
I'm in a constant state of anxiety
I'm one step away from a panic attack I can feel it
The thing is I have a child already his birth was okay
I don't know why I'm so freaked out

I’m like this, I’ve had 3 pregnancies and 3 births but they all ended in csections. Each pregnancy I’ve got more anxious about various different things. I’m very early pregnant (not planned) and freaking out about everything and anything. At the moment I’m expecting it to end in miscarriage but I know if it doesn’t and I move a bit further along I’ll be panicking about there being something wrong with the baby, then I’ll worry about my csection scar rupturing then I’ll worry about The csection itself....I’m going to ask to be referred to the antenatal mental health team because I’m an anxious mess in pregnancy and each one has been worse....I honestly think if this pregnancy goes to term they’ll have to put me to sleep during the csection because I’ll absolutely have a panic attack on the table. I would recommend telling the midwives how u feel and getting some help because I’ve been there and not told them or asked and it was a big mistake of mine x

Contact your community midwife, tell them how you feel and ask for a referral to perinatal mental health services. Hopefully the request for a section will be agreed without issue.

Just wanted to update incase anyone reads this and feels the same as me
So after staring at the midwifes phone number for a good while
I rang and said I need help I don't want to give birth etc
My midwife team is nothing short of amazing
They've put a plan in place to do with my c section meeting so my own midwife attends to advocate for me
As she's fully supportive as she's seen what I've been going through
They also managed to put my fears to rest
Lots of reassurance that everything is absolutely my choice

I feel loads better
I struggle to reach out for help but I'm so glad I did and would recommend anyone feeling the same does also