Where's my pregnancy gene?

[browndivegirl]

Following fertility treatment I'm finally pregnant and really looking forward to being a mum, BUT I just can't get excited about the preparations for it all. I had a dream last night that the baby was here, but that I hadn't bought a thing for it so I took myself to mothercare and babies r us for a bit of a browse today. The whole experience depressed rather than excited me. Why are there so many different types of buggy/moses basket/car seats. How on earth am I supposed to know which one will suit me best? And why are all the accessories so nauseatingly jolly? There were lots of other mums-to-be cooing over brightly coloured blankets and baby's first teddy but I just felt bored by it all. Am hoping this is due to my hormones rather than a missing pregnancy gene... Is it just me?

I know what you mean about too much choice - I was in mothercare yesterday trying to make a decision about breast pads, quickly realising that I have no frame of reference for such a decision.

I am also pretty unaffected by cutesy baby items - I like plain colours! Someone pointed me in the direction of american apparel whcih do normal coloured baby clothes - they aren't the cheapest though.

Everyone is different. I think more money can be made out of teddy bears and frills!

And congratulations on your pregnancy!

i was like you.
then i had my first scan.
then i felt the baby kick.
thats when it was real for me.
i started small, bought a baby grow from matalan.
couldnt be arsed with prams etc, so me and dh went one tues and picked an all in one jobby, pram, car seat, the pram folded into my boot ok and you could lie kid down/sit kid up. dead practical and a nice plain colour.
then got cot, didnt bother with moses basket etc.
it can be as simple as you make it really.
its not a gene missing, it just doesnt apeal, nowt wrong with that.

God I really thought I was a freak, it's nice to know that I'm not alone. I think that until I feel a sign from within I'm probably a bit worried about tempting fate, has been a long journey!

Thanks for the prompt support!

It is very overwhelming I think and the likes of Mothercare seem to cash in on first time mums by making you think you need all this stuff when really you dont.

Congratulations

My first child is an icsi baby and I was exactly like you. Bought nothing. Couldn't bring myself to look at baby grows etc. Did look at cots late on in pregnancy but nothing else. For me it was just an added stress. I couldn't really, really believe I was going to be a mum until after I knew baby had arrived safe and sound.
I use to be amazed at women who looked at baby grows before they were 39 weeks!!

I think because I had the added worry and stress of becoming pregnant then all I could do was worry again once I was pregnant.

Dd1 is 5 and a half and dd2 is 2. Most days I am tearing my hair out but still have my moments of amazement that they are mine!!

A huge, huge congratulations to you.

Congratulations! My ds is an ivf baby too.
Basically - nobody 'knows' these things. And you don't need most of them, really truly. The baby-stuff industry is huge.
And you have loads of time, I presume? You'll get a good dose of hormones near the end and suddenly go mad

I keep losing my preg gene, i think i drop it down the back of the sofa!
some weeks i have it, but more often than not, i don't.
i'm really overwhelmed by the shopping too. i have list preped for what i want but can't bring myself to buy the stuff!!
When i do manage to get myself in a baby shops, I lose the enthusiasm, it just doesn't feel like its for me or my baby.
It all feels surreal.

Hi, i'm pregnant with an IVF baby and i couldn't look at anything until 32 weeks. I was so terrified that something might go wrong (still am and only days left) and i couldn't find any pleasure in looking at anything. In fact i felt like a fraud in shops and was convinced that everyone knew that i didn't have clue at what i was looking at! I've only bought things now out of the fact that i hate not being organised and i won't leave DH to choose things for me. All my stuff is in boxes and it won't be unpacked until baby is here.
I'm sure its not a missing gene - just that its been so difficult to get this far, we may be too scared to relax and enjoy.
Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.

wouldn't worry, as everyone else has said...

Me & dp freak out every time we go into Mothercare and he has placed a ban on any clothes with cute puppies/teddies/lambs etc on... fine by me!! He can't understand why they don't do black babygros in Mothercare

The whole thing is just a bit overwhelming I think, and I have no idea how anyone could get excited about car seats/breast pumps/muslin squares... it's a means to an end though and I've decided that not being overjoyed about buying stuff doesn't mean I'm not looking forward to the baby's arrival!!!

Have managed to get some 'non cute' stuff at non scary prices by buying bits off ebay too.

i don't think the pregnancy gene is about shopping. Some people just like to shop more than others thats all!!

Hi Chunkypudding,
My dp is also looking for black baby clothes, so if you come across any let me know, as i had bought pink baby things before the 2o week scan, now i know we are having a boy i am not taking them back , he will just have to wear them. its just a colour for black iam not convinced.

all I have found so far is a 'my daddy rocks' t shirt by nappyhead - which dp is very by haha.

I will let you know if we find anything. Men, eh.

Got a couple of camo things 2nd hand from ebay - seems like a good pattern to dress a baby in to me, and dp happier with that than teddies or kittens

The one thing I know is that our baby won't care what he's wearing!!!

Think dp has been scarred by lots of photos of him as a baby looking like his granny had knitted him - seriously, fom head to toe, even as a toddler he was running around in knitted trousers. I find this very funny

Congrats! It wasnt until 22 weeks that I even thought about looking/ buying things - I started to finally get my bump, and feel the bub move and then it got exciting.
But i never had the cooing over babies/ clothes/ crying at the drop of a hat. I didnt cry at any of the scans or even when he was born. Don;t get me wrong - all those moments were the most magical of my life - the first time he was placed on my chest is one I will never ever forget. But we are all different - doesnt mean you lack any gene.

I think you're right about the stress level - getting pregnant was such a nightmare that I'm a bit scared to jinx it. Have decided to leave it all till after Xmas when hopefully my love of a bargain will kick in during the january sales...