ELCS or natural birth, which would you choose?

[PurplePinkParade]

TW: sexual assault

I've got a while to decide yet but it's playing on my mind a lot. Had quite a traumatic birth with DD1, I was quite young and had no idea what I was doing, felt very out of control, I went to 42 weeks and was in labour for 4 days so was absolutely exhausted, DD got stuck then I had a second degree tear which didn't heal properly. I have been sexually assaulted in the past by an ex partner so am quite anxious about anyone touching me down there anyway unless I really trust them. I have been told I can have an ELCS if I wish due to the reasons above.

Due date is 2 weeks before Christmas so I'm worried if I go so overdue again and have a long labour I'll be in hospital over Christmas. However I'm scared of the idea of a CS. When would they schedule it in for? 40 weeks, or earlier? I'm worried about the prospect of not being able to walk or move over Christmas as I have family all over the country and another DD I have to look after.

Thoughts?

It’s such a personal choice. I had a traumatic first birth and an EMCS from which I became very ill. For my second birth I pushed hard for a VBAC.

I would ask to speak to PMA to discuss your options and for on going support and I would also ask for a referral to maternal mental services so you have some where to discuss and work through your ideas.

I’d have an ELCS. I had an ELCS on Dec 21st and was absolutely fine to go to a family Xmas dinner on Dec 25th. Recovery was fine.

I had an emergency c section following a very painful 2 day labour that didn’t progress. I would 100% got for elective next time. In fact labour was so traumatic for me this is why my child is still an only child.

It really is your choice and whichever you are leaning toward. My c section recovery was good and I was at a family wedding a week later.

It's so your choice. What does your heart want?

It's obviously a very personal decision and absolutely up to you. I was offered a ELCS for my second and, for my own reasons, decided not to, but then ended up staying in on the ward for a couple of days surrounded by women having ELCS's! It was all lovely and calm for them and they were sent home fairly quickly. Had I had an ELCS, it would have been scheduled at around 37/38 weeks. They met their surgeon on the ward prior to going down and had the procedure explained to them and them got wheeled back up looking happy a couple of hours later!! Definitely sounds worth considering in your situation, especially being able to avoid a Christmas birth the risk of further downstairs trauma

As for the CS itself, I had an emergency one with my first. From my experience... Spinal blocker is amazing so you just feel some weird tugging. Anaesthetist is head end the whole time and they keep you calm and tell you what's happening. You're in a weird position as they tilt the bed slightly so you tilted slightly down and slightly to one side, but you're talked through the whole thing. I can understand being anxious of one, but only as nerve wracking as labour but calmer and more explanation given (even in emergency one)

I have had two planned CS - both calm, controlled and joyful experiences, I believe they tend to book you in for around 39 weeks. I was lucky enough to have straightforward recoveries with both - up and about the next day and within a week or so back to doing most things (except heavy lifting and driving!) Good luck with your decision x

Section is usually scheduled during the 39th week. It does have its benefits re being so close to xmas. I had emcs first time and the Christmas element really did play a part in my decision second time as if I went over as I did in first pregnancy I wld have been induced and probably in hospital over Xmas. She actually turned up 3 wks early and I laboured for 12hrs before getting the section. Recovery is tough but after first few days you'll start to feel better every day. I'd go for section in ur circumstances.

I had two traumatic births and then had an ELCS. It was so calm and controlled, no babies getting in distress, surgical incisions yes but no injuries to my nether regions or hemorrhaging. Was a million times better. Both baby and I were in much better shape physically and I was also in better shape mentally.

I had an EMCS for Ds1 and chose a ELCS for Ds2. The first one was rushed, traumatic with a baby in distress and obviously a very worrying time.

The second one I chose because I had no family or friends living near me (recently moved to new area and SAHM so no work mates either) and it meant I could get childcare in place for Ds1 on a set date. Ds2 was born at 39 weeks. I went over due with Ds1.

Obviously my first one was rushed, I was tired as had been in labour a long time and the decision was taken out of my hands. Ds2's birth was calm, I walked down to theatre, I knew when it would be happening and I could have things in place for Dh being off work, a freezer full of food etc.

With Ds1 I could drive at 2 weeks post op just in case I needed to in an emergency situation. He was hospitalised before he was a week old with a possible heart defect, hence trying to drive at 2 weeks just in case. With Ds2 I didn't even try until 5 weeks or so but felt okay to look after Ds1 who was just 3 when Ds2 was born. Dh only had 2 weeks paternity leave so I was on my own after that.

This is just to tell you my experience, you can gather as much information about it as you can and make your decision.

I had a EMCS with 1st and an ELCS with 2nd. The ELCS was wonderful. Out same day & recovery was speedy.
Recovery for first EMCS was not. I expect due to labouring beforehand & the stress of being kept in hospital & not moving about much.
My babies were both breach so they didn't let me get to 40 weeks with 2nd.

I've had 2 inductions and natural births. First dd was ventouse delivery with episiotomy. Expected 2nd dd to be less traumatic. Had an emergency forceps delivery without an epidural and another episiotomy. If I'd been offered an elcs I'd have jumped at it. 2nd birth put me off having anymore children and recovery was long. I'd opt for the elcs, give yourself a good start to welcoming a newborn.

I could tell you what I'd go for, but it wouldn't be helpful because I'm not you. It's a tough one. I'd say ask for a comprehensive list of pros and cons for you and the baby from your midwife and then sit a home and add your own. See which decision makes the most sense to you.

I would always choose a VB. I had to have an ELCS last time as I had breech twins and it was the safest thing for them. After my cs I felt fine and was able to do most things without pain relief. My mother had made such a fuss about cs as she said it was really rough after having me by emcs so I was terrified of them, was much better than I expected. I only spent 1 night in hospital despite heavy blood loss, spent less than 36 hours in hospital. Our girls were delivered at 38wk as they don't like twins going beyond that, singletons they aim to deliver around 39wk.

Elective sections can be very calm. You know the date in advance, you aren't in a big rush as there's no emergency and often you can go home quite shortly afterwards- I think if everything is OK you only stay in 1 or 2 nights.

In our area they're booked in at 39 weeks. Certainly not later than 40 weeks as s matter of course.