Wedding Dresses

[Littlepaws18]

So I managed to time two major events a week apart! I'm due on July 30th (have gestational diabetes so I know it will happen then or before then via induction) I'm also getting married in the second week of August. Can I find a nice pregnancy wedding dress?! Nope. Has anyone got any ideas- budget is whatever it costs to look less like a hippo!

@Analysethat

See just because someone disagrees with you - doesn’t mean they are troll. People were giving you friendly advice and you insulted them first.

If that was friendly advice, I'd hate to see what you think unfriendly advice is!

@Graphista

The dress I spoke of was very similar to the one attached differences being:

Pressed in pleats
Semi sweetheart rather than a deep neckline
Slightly less shaped empire line

i.weddingomania.com/25-airy-and-romantic-empire-waist-wedding-dresses-11.jpg

Oh that dress is absolutely beautiful and one I haven't seen before I'll definitely check that out ty! Gives me hope I can wear something that gives me confidence.

@Graphista

In addition to your own health there's a possibility baby may be poorly after the birth too. When I had my dd we were both still in hospital at the point you'd be getting married.

So with that in mind my recommendation is actually to bring the wedding forward if possible. Weirdly you'll probably be feeling better and be better able to cope before the birth than right after.

Regarding a dress, weddings are an area I used to work in. One dress that prove very popular with pregnant brides but will not be around now but hopefully you can find something similar, was an empire line dress with sheer overlays that were pencil pleated creating the image of narrow vertical lines so it draped over the bump gently without straining against it - just an idea - also wouldn't sit on or irritate any c-section scar

Also just an idea - if you do go ahead with the post birth wedding you could have a red wedding dress, dresses come in all colours now even if the advertised image is of it in white/ivory etc look at the detail of the various dresses online and you'll often find they are available in a variety of colours. I've seen and dressed brides in amazing dresses in red, blue, purple, green, deep pink, even orange (I wasn't such a fan of that one but the bride loved it and the colour held special meaning for the couple)

Red is actually a fairly widely available colour for wedding dresses now.

Also ensure you have a good BRIDAL seamstress to make any alterations necessary - note it's easier to take a dress IN than it is to let it OUT so err towards too big rather than too small. Non bridal seamstresses tend not to have the skill and experience needed to handle such delicate fabrics and aren't often experienced in working with the shapes of wedding dresses, I've also dealt with many a bride desperately trying to find a last minute dress because a high street seamstress who normally only deals with everyday clothes has messed up their dress! A truly skilled seamstress can alter sizing, change the neckline, add/remove sleeves and straps, balance the shaping and work wonders generally! The seamstress I used to work with (sadly retired now) once altered a wedding dress to make it easier for a disabled bride to not only put on in the first place but be able to manage various medical devices and toileting on the day with minimal help needed from others and still look "traditionally bridal"

If you are still bleeding a lot come the day instead of relying on mere pads - which can leak and slip etc - I'd recommend you get period pants or at least tena pants as there's a larger area of absorbency and they're easier to remove by tearing down the sides rather than trying to remove normally and risking catching blood on the dress. Again also a good seamstress if you advise them of potential issues may well be able to come up with solutions and alterations for you.

But as I say I think bringing the wedding forward might be a better option for you

I'm very sorry for all your losses and heartache

Red is a lovely idea and again never thought of that ty!

[quote Nobranothanks]@Littlepaws18 your response then was brilliant. Good Luck with the wedding. Just to add a positive post birth story - I was absolutely fine 2 weeks after birth, I was back doing pole fitness within 3 weeks of her being born. Miraculously the bump went literally as soon as I had my daughter (disclaimer: I'm not a skinny person, I lost a lot of weight prior to being pregnant and was a size 12-14 and went back to that size - I already had a wobbly Tum due to being large from a very young age!)[/quote]
Wow go you! Pole dancing is so difficult! I admire you a lot for that, I had a friend who was the most incredible pole dancer, it's such a talent. I'm a size 14, but quite tall. I have also broken my knee and gave arthritis in my toes so my dress needs to take flat shoes.

But I think I have a solution my mom has found a really lovely dress which is pink flowly and shows off the right assets! So hopefully I'll feel good!

Right thanks for the top tips. Given me a lot of things to consider. I think I really need to think about underwear. Also had a really good chat last night with my partner about all eventualities and what might happen worse case scenario.

It just confirms to me I'm marrying the right man!

Thanks for advice I'll update how crazy it all turns out!

@Littlepaws18 If you are that precious, maybe it’s a good idea just to stay off the internet. You say it’s not about the the actual wedding more the getting married and people politely advised that 2 weeks after giving birth might be a bit adventurous, and it might be wise to move it further one so you are back to normal. Not sure what’s not friendly about that?

I’m done debating this with you - no one on the internet really cares that much about what you do with your life, same goes for my life but I don’t insult people who try to help. 👍

Just as another positive story, I went to a wedding 3 days after having number 2. There was no pressure to attend as it was a buffet but I felt fine, a bit fat but physically ok. Was lovely to show dd off to family.

So you've already had a baby and so know how you felt before ? I had GD and it was all talk of induction by 37 weeks, but due to the baby's size and my GD being under control they let me go until 5 days overdue despite me wanting the induction earlier. I went in the night of being 5 days overdue, but it was busy so they didn't start until 6 days overdue. I was lucky it only took 24 hours, my sisters induction took 6 days, I have no idea why they let it drag on that long.

Hope you find a lovely dress.

If the dress fits at 6 months pregnant you should be ok, but have a local dressmakers number (and speak to them in advance) to get any necessary alterations. I was about the same size as 6 months pregnant after I gave birth.

I do think you need to be flexible, you may need to buy a dress from a charity shop if it's not comfortable for instance, but cross that bridge if needed.

Yes, as some are saying, you may be sore but speaking from personal experience I was fine within 24 hours out and about and bleeding was no more than a period by 2 weeks out, regular flow not heavy, but I would suggest buying a pair of period pants or two for extra security. Everyone is different so no one can generalise and say what you are proposing isn't possible

@SavannahLands

I've stayed in chain hotels in 3 continents and never have been told no under 5's. Independents are sometimes adults only but they are a rarity

Ps if you going to have a second outfit I would choose separates if you are going to breastfeed, I had a long flowing skirt and and silky vest top I could raise to feed dd.

[quote Analysethat]@Littlepaws18 If you are that precious, maybe it’s a good idea just to stay off the internet. You say it’s not about the the actual wedding more the getting married and people politely advised that 2 weeks after giving birth might be a bit adventurous, and it might be wise to move it further one so you are back to normal. Not sure what’s not friendly about that?

I’m done debating this with you - no one on the internet really cares that much about what you do with your life, same goes for my life but I don’t insult people who try to help. 👍[/quote]
Unsolicited advice at its finest

I think I've sorted it. My mom is a great seamstress and has pinned my current dress to my figure and has a plan for letting it out if needs be. It's great to have that talent! But I've also bought a fairly reasonably priced other dress in pink that is a maternity one and floaty. This means that if I find the more fitted one uncomfortable or I gave embarrassing leakage I can switch to the other dress, where I can wear the most structured, safe underwear underneath, which will hopefully last the night!

Thanks to those who stuck to the topic of the thread and offered advice linked to the question and not unsolicited life advice! X

I was bridesmaid six weeks after giving birth and we went dress shopping at 6 months, tried the dress on quite soon after giving birth for alteration purposes and other than adjustment on the straps it fit fine :) the only thing I hadn't accounted for was my boobs, never really had any before and they were massive once my milk came in lol. Thankfully the dress was able to have a modesty stitch in to contain them.

Glad to have helped and happy you seem to have things sorted.

Red can look AMAZING there's no need to have a white/ivory/cream dress these days if you want some colour. I think my favourite colourful one I ever saw was a satin iridescent purple in a wrap/layer design, as the wearer turned or the light changed you'd see all different purple shades in the layers, just gorgeous! The bride who wore it was tall and not plus size but sturdily built.

Everyone around her was saying to stick with something subtle and traditional blah blah blah...

She ignored them and had purple dress, matching high heeled Victorian style boots and a lilac parasol instead of a bouquet. She looked absolutely stunning!

Groom wore a grey morning suit with top hat and other accessories matching the purple of the dress

They should have been in a magazine or something.

At 2 weeks pp your bump won't be a problem - it will have gone down quite a lot. The problem will be your breasts. If you plan to breast feed you will need easy access as you will be still establishing your supply and you will be doing well to get two hours between feeds, which are likely to take 30-40 minutes at a time. You must not have anything firm or rigid pressing on any breast tissue as this will give you a plugged duct which can very quickly become mastitis. If you plan to formula feed your breasts will likely still be fluctuating in size at this point.

I would strongly recommend that you avoid traditional bridal colours. They are just an extra layer of worry that you won't need. No matter what a dress looks like, if you wear it to get married then it is a wedding dress!

Finally, have very minimal expectations of yourself for the day. Aim to get legally married and take care of your baby, and consider anything else to be a bonus. Good luck.