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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Assistant delivery

27 replies

Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 19:27

Hi everyone.

I am 11 weeks pregnant with my first baby (still have a long way to go but trying to get my head around things).

I have a rare heart condition which means any severe pressure can cause my heart valve to tear, therefore I was always told I’d have to have a planned caesarean. I have now been told the best way would be to have a natural birth but completely assisted by the doctors/midwives, so it would involve an epidural and then forceps, so no pushing at all. I will be induced at 38 weeks.

Have anyone had a similar experience to this?

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Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 19:27

My title should say ‘assisted delivery’

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Willow4987 · 20/03/2021 19:29

If I was in your shoes I’d go for the c section

Forceps can often cause issues with the pelvic floor which in turn can cause incontinence issues

Willow4987 · 20/03/2021 19:30

Oh and sorry just to say my first birth was vaginal and ended up with forceps (which have left me with issues)

I opted for a c section the second time around

I don’t have any experience of the lack of pushing aspect you describe however

BigPyjamas · 20/03/2021 19:32

I don't have experience of your situation but I have given birth.

I would strongly suggest c section. Induction, Epidural, intervention etc all suggest pressure and stress to me. Lots of unknowns.

I'd take the certainty of a c section over an assisted birth (I had a bad first delivery and very long recovery subsequently hence my viewpoint)

BigPyjamas · 20/03/2021 19:33

Also, if you aren't pushing won't the baby be very high?

Of all the forceps the high ones (I forget the name) are the ones I'd be most concerned about. There is lots of research into this I'm sure. I'm sure you'll want to do some proper research before deciding

Chelyanne · 20/03/2021 19:41

Sod that... I'd tell them to do an elcs rather than use forceps (nasty things).

sylbunny · 20/03/2021 19:43

Who has told you this? Are you under a consultant yet? If I were you I'd have a number of chats with the consultant about this and understand your risks and options. It's your decision ultimately.

OverTheRainbow88 · 20/03/2021 19:53

I had forceps but also had to push like crazy at the same time.

In your shoes I would demand a section!

Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 19:54

Yes I’m under a consultant. I have been given the option to have this or a caesarean, however with my particular condition they have said the risk of a caesarean is higher.

I mentioned I was worried about forceps as my mum had them with me due to complications and she had problems for years but they reassured me they would be used till the babies head was out, but unsure how this would work with no pushing?

I have an appointment every 4 weeks so I can discuss options nearer the time but I’m just really unsure, I’d like to think I can trust them as they’ve been great so far.

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Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 19:55

wont be used till the babies head is out.

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Madaleinerw · 20/03/2021 19:55

Hi @Thefaceofboe
I hope you're ok! I would feel very uneasy about the situation if I were you so I can totally get if you're worried or stressed!

I think your best option would be to speak thoroughly with your midwife and consultant or all of the pros and cons for both.

I don't have a heart condition so I can't comment on which option would be safest but a natural labour with induction, epidural and the use of forceps sounds quite stressful and 'out of your control' to me. I had my little girl last year and was induced. The contractions were very very strong and that urge to push is something you can't ignore. I didn't have an epidural though so perhaps that takes that urge away?

The no pushing thing just seems abit bizzare to me. I didn't think it was possible to not push ad the baby has to get down at least abit of the birth canal, surely?

I hope you're ok! Talk things over with your midwife and make sure you're comfortable with your plan of action Smile

OverTheRainbow88 · 20/03/2021 19:57

I’m not sure how you’d get the babies head out without pushing...! Sounds very odd

Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 20:00

@OverTheRainbow88 im sure they did explain to me but there was so much information to take in it’s all got muddled in my head!

@Madaleinerw thanks for your reply! I don’t understand the no pushing either, but apparently my body will naturally push with each contraction so I don’t need to? I’m sure it’s a lot more complication than that but like I said above they gave me SO much information a lot of it went in one ear and out the other.

The consulted seemed very confident this was the best option however has told me to research both before I decide, and I really don’t like the sound of forceps. I think the recovery time of a c section is what’s putting me off that too Sad

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Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 20:06

I’ve just read about foetus ejection reflex but this seems natural and not something which can be forced? Honestly no idea but it’s something I will ask at my next appointment.

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Willow4987 · 20/03/2021 20:07

Your body does sort of take over pushing...but you’re still pushing so I don’t really understand what your consultant is on about if they’re saying they don’t want you to push. Your body will just do it

Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 20:10

@Willow4987 I presume they mean pushing to the point of exhaustion but I’m not sure.

They said 10 years ago I would have 100% been given a c section but after research this seems to be the safest option Confused

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Willow4987 · 20/03/2021 20:17

It’s really difficult as a lot of the data for the c sections includes emergency which skews the data

If you’re conflicted you could ask for a second opinion from another consultant

Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 20:18

@Willow4987 I think I will get a second opinion, I’m glad I have a long time to think about it!

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RandomMess · 20/03/2021 20:21

Women in comas give birth because your body just do it for you. It's an odd concept but hopeful you will be referred to a team that has experience in doing them?

Keyboard91 · 20/03/2021 20:34

I was treated as if I had a heart condition as no-one really knew how my paralysis condition would react and they didn’t want to take the risk of anything happening.

I was induced at 38 weeks. Once water broke I was taken to delivery and epidural put in straight away. They boosted it regularly (not my control) so I could never feel anything, and so the drip could be put high - was very weird but I was able to rest and exertion actually felt less than when I was waiting for labour to start, even though my body was clearly doing big things. I was not allowed to physically push until baby’s head was crowning, and there was a strict time limit for me to push, at which point they would intervene and give him a tug.

I could feel a lot of pressure as he came down and turned, the contractions just did their thing (I just chilled!) and he did crown and then when I pushed he flew out.

I was at risk of instrumental and forceps were my biggest fear. Luckily I didn’t need the intervention and he was out after 8 minutes of actual pushing.

If they said I couldn’t push and forceps were definitely going to be used I would’ve gone for a section to protect myself down there. But it comes down to what YOU want and what YOU feel comfortable with along with what is needed to keep YOU safe.

Don’t be afraid to ask for an additional appointment to discuss it all. You can also ask for a second opinion, or can also get in touch with your cardiologist. Whatever gives you the information to make an informed decision.

Feel free to ask any questions x

Teakind · 20/03/2021 20:41

My concern with their suggested option would be what if the baby goes in to distress. When I had my DS his heart rate started going down and then told me to push as hard as I could because he needed to be out quickly. Turns out the cord was wrapped around his neck and it all became urgent quite quickly. There wouldn’t have been time for a reflex to take over. If that happened and your baby had descended far down the birth canal, would forceps reach? I really don’t know but I’d ask.

FTEngineerM · 20/03/2021 20:44

Eh, I’m confused. The baby’s head doesn’t just fall out.

I had epidural and even after 3 hours of pushing, a turd, stopping epidural to feel contractions and then pushing we ended up with forceps... where I still had to push and she pulled at the same time.

Madaleinerw · 20/03/2021 20:45

@Keyboard91 wow! This has amazed me! How incredible Shock. I'm so pleased you were able to give birth like that as opposed to a c-section! Our bodies are amazing!

Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 21:25

@Keyboard91 thanks so much for your comment, that’s really interesting and sounds like I’ll be doing something similar to you. How did you find the experience? I think I have to come to terms with the fact I won’t be having a normal birth and just hope everything goes to plan. I’ll definitely ask for more details at my next appointment.

@FTEngineerM I presume I will be given drugs of some kind to help, but honestly I have no idea. They seemed pretty confident I wouldn’t have to push at all Confused

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Original poster
Thefaceofboe · 20/03/2021 21:28

@Teakind that’s an interesting point actually, I’ll have to ask. I think if it came to it I’d just have to push and just get the baby out. I will have a team of surgeons on hand if I need emergency surgery on my heart according to the consultant (scary thought)

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