Found out i was 14 weeks gone

[NervousnScared]

Hi everyone!

I am currently 36 weeks pregnant. Everything has come up normal and there’s no physical concerns.
i found out i was pregnant at 14 weeks and living life as normal, having a few drinks on the weekend and occasionally during the week (nothing crazy wasn’t getting drunk regularly/ever).

And a few times in the summer (not too concerned about that because it was really early) where i was having heavier drinking weekends.

i just am so concerned that I’ve harmed my baby :( and i know no amount is safe. Haven’t had anything since finding out.

any reassurance or anyone who have been in my shoes that can share their stories?
TIA

How many drinks a week do you think you were having?

Congrats! Aww I would so love to be expecting a tiny baby again, please be happy and excited and don't worry. It will be absolutely fine. I know loads of people who have been in this situation and worse. Fetal alcohol syndrome, honestly, you need to be drinking a LOT regularly. Also in the early weeks the placenta isn't even attached so at first it makes no difference. The advice is on the over-cautious side. Before I found out I was pregnant, I ate raw meat, sushi, alcohol etc. Was living the life of riley frankly. Baby was absolutely perfect. I worried over nothing. Xx

So, please don't worry at all on this account. There are enough things to worry about!

found out at 27 weeks
partied like no tomorrow during that, dabbled in everything, working, heavy lifting, theme park rides
dd born healthy and now 11 yrs old
try not to worry

YellowPurple,
Probably two a few evenings a week, usually with a meal.
The weekend maybe 3 or 4 over the course of the evening/night. Maybe got drunk (not even drunk, tipsy. Like i couldn’t drive but i remember everything... three times?— twice in august and once in October).

Thank you Ineedcoffee2021. That is reassuring! I honestly felt so alone. And hearing stories like yours really helps. Thank you

Sillyoldmommy, thank you for the reassurance and kindness

@NervousnScared

Thank you Ineedcoffee2021. That is reassuring! I honestly felt so alone. And hearing stories like yours really helps. Thank you

No worries Your definitely not alone, try to remember a lot of the advice is on the cautious side and there many who found out late but feel shame or the like from people getting so zealous over the advice and what they were told when they had kids/or read on the net so its easier to say 'nope didnt do nothing against advice' Even midwives make women feel this so they lie

Yes, you’re right. It’s so terrifying when everything says none is safe (which i understand why) and then I have no idea or reassurance. And other people I’ve seen on different forums saying that i probably did Damage etc is also scary.

@NervousnScared

Yes, you’re right. It’s so terrifying when everything says none is safe (which i understand why) and then I have no idea or reassurance. And other people I’ve seen on different forums saying that i probably did Damage etc is also scary.

they the forums to avoid just out to scare and make someone feel bad

Was emigrating to Canada. Had several leaving parties, meals etc and drank lots. Lots of stress with selling a house and packing to leave. Lots of parties and events on arriving. Discovered I was pregnant a couple of weeks later. I had irregular periods anyway, so thought nothing of it. Couldn’t get an urgent scan in my town, so had to drive 4.5 hours to the nearest city. Measurements put me at 19 weeks.

@MooseBeTimeForSummer

Was emigrating to Canada. Had several leaving parties, meals etc and drank lots. Lots of stress with selling a house and packing to leave. Lots of parties and events on arriving. Discovered I was pregnant a couple of weeks later. I had irregular periods anyway, so thought nothing of it. Couldn’t get an urgent scan in my town, so had to drive 4.5 hours to the nearest city. Measurements put me at 19 weeks.

Wow you had a lot going on. And quite a long drive to get to care. How did everything turn out for you?

This is only my experience as a teacher and not a medical expert, but the only children I've ever come across (and that has still been very very few) who have any physical impact of fetal alcohol symptom, have been those in the care system whose mothers were alcoholics.

It's only been a few years since the medical advice was that you could have a small amount of alcohol daily, so I really wouldn't worry. This happens to lots of women.

People do go very extreme sometimes on forums and things - think car seats for example - the very vocal people are the ones who rear face for years, who sign up to Which to find the best seat, won't use a high back booster until well after most children move into one. And that's all absolutely fine, but those people are acting very cautiously compared to the general population- most people find a seat that fits their car and is within their budget, buy it and never think any more about it. But they aren't the ones on forums talking about it, and the people who keep having the odd drink through pregnancy don't often pop up and talk about that either.

@GreenSlide

It's only been a few years since the medical advice was that you could have a small amount of alcohol daily, so I really wouldn't worry. This happens to lots of women.

People do go very extreme sometimes on forums and things - think car seats for example - the very vocal people are the ones who rear face for years, who sign up to Which to find the best seat, won't use a high back booster until well after most children move into one. And that's all absolutely fine, but those people are acting very cautiously compared to the general population- most people find a seat that fits their car and is within their budget, buy it and never think any more about it. But they aren't the ones on forums talking about it, and the people who keep having the odd drink through pregnancy don't often pop up and talk about that either.

That’s a good perspective and i didn’t think of it like that. When asking a bit a while ago, most people that replied all found out at like 4-6 weeks pregnant and majority we’re ttc. Thank you for that

This happens a far bit as I remember other similar threads such as the one below

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2927750-found-out-at-27-weeks-worried-about-alcohol-use?reverse=1

There is lots of research to suggest that FAS and FASD is caused by alcohol consumption in pregnancy, the level of alcohol which can cause FASD is unknown as research cannot ethically investigate this.
I read once that only 5 % of babies born to those who are alcoholics have full blown FAS . A recent social study in the UK found that as many as 17 % of the population could have FAS so there is a a 95% -83% chance your baby will be fine; those are good odds.
In the very unlikely event you did have a baby with FAS/FASD then most children with this syndrome do really well with the right support, nearly all children with the rare condition of FAS are in mainstream education as only 25% of children with FAS have learning disabilities. Those with FAS can and do learn they just need a different parenting style.
In addition to this most experiences of parents with FAS children are adopters and although their experiences are very valid, it is difficult to know how much of these children’s difficulties is due to trauma/abuse and attachment issues not just FAS.
I know a few older women who had babies in the 70s who literally drank a moderate amount in pregnancy and their children are all fine. The placenta is amazing at filtering out poisons that is part of the reason why we have evolved as a human race.
FASD is believed to be caused by very excessive drinking throughout pregnancy.
Please stop worrying and enjoy this moment.

Sorry for the long post I am somewhat an expert

@Leobynature

There is lots of research to suggest that FAS and FASD is caused by alcohol consumption in pregnancy, the level of alcohol which can cause FASD is unknown as research cannot ethically investigate this. I read once that only 5 % of babies born to those who are alcoholics have full blown FAS . A recent social study in the UK found that as many as 17 % of the population could have FAS so there is a a 95% -83% chance your baby will be fine; those are good odds. In the very unlikely event you did have a baby with FAS/FASD then most children with this syndrome do really well with the right support, nearly all children with the rare condition of FAS are in mainstream education as only 25% of children with FAS have learning disabilities. Those with FAS can and do learn they just need a different parenting style. In addition to this most experiences of parents with FAS children are adopters and although their experiences are very valid, it is difficult to know how much of these children’s difficulties is due to trauma/abuse and attachment issues not just FAS. I know a few older women who had babies in the 70s who literally drank a moderate amount in pregnancy and their children are all fine. The placenta is amazing at filtering out poisons that is part of the reason why we have evolved as a human race. FASD is believed to be caused by very excessive drinking throughout pregnancy. Please stop worrying and enjoy this moment. Sorry for the long post I am somewhat an expert

Thank you so much for linking a similar thread and for all the insight! It is really reassuring knowing I’m not alone, and not the only one. Also that things do turn out well for a lot of people who might have had drinks before knowing.

Also, thank you for the insights into the prevalence.