Morning,
I would like to have some outsider input as my friends and mum will back me regardless so be good to get some other perspective. Going to try and keep it as short as I can:
I’ve always had a difficult relationship with my MIL, she is not a nice drunk, very controlling (admits this more recently) and likes to have everything her way. However I have always thought she has a good heart and always tried my best to be close with her and to a degree we really are, we text a lot and do get on following all our past issues with how I was treated when I first came on the scene many years ago.
Anyway, yesterday on Mother’s Day we dropped her some bits outside the house and spoke out the front (my partner and I). She had a drink and I could feel the shift in her attitude. Her daughter was there too who I have a real rusty relationship with also, SIL has attacked me when drunk too a week after my father’s funeral) and also my partner (her brother). MIL also does have a interesting relationship with her daughter (SIL) moved out several years ago at a young age because of how volatile their relationship was. Basically, it’s a toxic family and I find it hard to be part of.
So I have had lots of issues with this pregnancy, bleeding and had to take antibiotics which i’m now quite anxious about. It’s been a toll on my mental health and I have not really left the home... I work full time at home anyway. MIL asked me how I was feeling yesterday in front of SIL who I rarely see, I said i’m okay thanks, she said have you been out anywhere, I said not really, trip to Tesco, her response “so you do still want this baby then?” my other half had gone round the corner to vape away from me so didn’t hear.
Second thing - “are you going to be in your bubble when the baby is born and make her be in it too and not let anyone see her”
Third thing - “not got anymore private scans booked in then hahahah” really laughing. I had booked a few private scans due to anxiety around the constant bleeding. I felt like I was a joke and that I was being criticized.
She text last night being all nice etc. saying thanks for stuff and nice to see us and I replied but did also say I do obviously want this child thinking she’d get the hint I was upset. She didn’t. It’s really grating on me today and I don’t want to let her push me around and feel she can say what she wants, I feel like I should put some ground rules in now.
So do I:
A - forget it, you’re being really sensitive just get over it she’d had a drink
B- wait for her to text and just ask her politely to not say those things again
C- text first and say it had upset me
D - none of the above (please give your suggestions)