Advice needed

[EMF2021]

Hello,

Just wanting some advice / Reassurance.
Currently I'm 21 weeks pregnant and so far its been horrendous.
I currently have Carpel Tunnel which has been agonizing for which I've had an injection and I also have SPD coupled with sciatica, I've also been put on tablets for sickness which hasn't really helped and seem to constantly have a headache. I'm absolutely over the moon to be pregnant, Previous to this pregnancy I had an ectopic and a miscarriage and I'm so anxious/ terrified about losing this pregnancy or something going wrong at some stage to the point that I keep frantically checking my underwear for blood when I feel moist from the increased CM (TMI I'm sorry) , I just can't get it out of my head. Luckily I'm currently working from home but I'm really struggling with it between feeling like absolute crap and exhausted and the headspace I'm in with anxiety. I'm unsure if I'm just been pathetic, I was thinking about going to the GP and asking to be signed off for a few weeks to rest up but I'm so nervous to ask incase they think I'm just been silly and this is how all women feel going through pregnancy. Do I just need to get a grip and keep struggling through? Is this how everyone else is feeling?

Hi! It sounds like you have a combination of things that everyone goes through, but to have them all at the same time is miserable for you. Do you have a midwife appt coming up? If so, it might be good just to mention then that you are struggling with working whilst feeling like this.

I have no idea if gp would sign you off or not but if you really feel like you need it then give them a call. The worst they can say is no. But they might be able to help with some of the issues.

Hi! Sorry you're feeling this way. I have no advice though. Just thought I'd let you know it's completely normal.
I had 2 previous miscarriages. I now have 2 live children and currently 36 weeks with number 3, but I still check and expect blood at every moment.
I refuse to buy anything I need until at least 32 weeks because I'm so worried about something going wrong

If you feel you need to be signed off for a few weeks and that it will help you to get a bit of space to catch your breath, then definitely do that.

I’m also quite anxious due to previous losses (only 9 weeks) but have found that working helps take my mind off obsessing over it. But everyone is different - it does sound like you’re struggling and maybe a break from work would help you xx

Thanks ladies, much appreciated, its nice to know I'm not alone with the anxiety its the most awful feeling isn't it ? Just waiting for something to go wrong, previous losses really do make it such a difficult journey but one I'm also so grateful to be on, its so common yet no one seems to speak about in unless its a supportive place like this I really appreciate it and hope you are coping as best as possible one day at a time.

With baby number 1 I used to weep all the way on the walk to work. I was in so much pain. Walking up and downstairs etc was sore. I hadn't been in the job long, it was a big job, my head was up my a$s but I felt like I had to prove myself.

The worst bit for me was my boss's wife was exactly the same amount of pregnant and she was breezing through it and he 100% judged me everytime I grimaced when I stood up. DH was working away for the last 10 weeks (made it home from Saudi with 24 hours to spare) and I was living in a new country without any close friends or family.

I had a GP (in Ireland) who believed women working until they are 38 weeks pregnant was madness and would have signed me off anytime. I didn't take him up on it, worked to 38 weeks and was bloody miserable.

I almost certainly was being pathetic but with hindsight I absolutely should have been kinder to myself. Just because people do it every day doesn't mean you do.

I didn't even learn my lesson second time around. Stressed and stressed over a project that I knew would die a death the second I walked out the door and worked til the week before my dad died whilst trying to help take care of him and looking after a 14 month old. Although at least that time I did gave the good sense to get myself back to Scotland earlier than planned so I could be with my dad. But I even felt dramatic asking for that!

Long and short of it is growing a human is HARD (not for everyone but for me and for you it was). If you need a break take it!! You won't get a chance for future pregnancies when you have smalls to look after even if you do take some time off.

Good luck and hope you feel better soon!

I feel like I could have written this myself but yes absolutely call your GP.

I've had horrendous sickness since I was 4/5 weeks to which at 20 weeks was diagnosed as HG after I was hospitalised for. I'm now 24 weeks and taking medication which helps to an extent but I'm still sick - I've had awful carpal tunnel for the last 4/5 weeks and it's only tomorrow I'm getting steroid injections for it to see if it helps.

I work from home too, it's not a job I can just let slip a few days here and there as it's high pressures and target driven and a few weeks ago I just couldn't handle it and spoke to the GP (this is where they decided to book me in for the steroid injections as I just burst out crying as I haven't been sleeping because if it's not the pain in my hands it's being sick) and the GP actually suggested to sign me off for a week. I very very rarely take sick days but I jumped at the chance and it really helped me if only mentally, just to have that breather and time out if only for a little while.

Since then I've realised I've got to look after myself better, our bodies our going through tremendous things and some suffer a lot more than others and we need to not feel bad that we need some time out when it's gotten really bad.

Please call your doctor, they will completely understand and I hope you get that bit of rest your body clearly needs xxx