Big Day Bump? Help!

[LilyRose202]

Hi,
So my fiancé and I are due to get married this July ('21). We were really keen to start a family soon after but I'm bridesmaid at my best friend's wedding next May and I don't want to be pregnant at her wedding. We really don't want to wait as it could take ages...who knows!

I don't mind being in the early stages of pregnancy at my own wedding but I'm worried I'll look huge and won't fit into my dress.

For anyone who has had children before, would I be showing at 4.5 months? I'm average build, 5"4, reasonably slim but curvy too. Dress is "ball gown" style so sticks out from waist down.

Thanks xx

I'm 19 weeks/4.5 months and oh yeah I'm showing! Both pregnancies, about the same. 164cm and starting weight of 50kg and 45kg, so slim. Bigger people in my due date group are showing too.

Might maybe get away with a ball gown if the waist was just a bit higher than usual but I keep getting bloated after eating so eating really would be out in a dress like that for me. Could do it for show briefly I guess.

I didn't show with either of mine until around 30 weeks. I am a slim size 10 and 5 foot 2. Everyone shows differently but I think as a first time mum, you tend to show later too.

I started showing around 16 weeks. Some can be earlier, some a lot later. Honestly though, don’t hold off trying for the sake of something like a wedding. You could catch right away but also be prepared for it to take a while. If you’re ready to start trying just do it and deal with being pregnant at the time if needs be x

I’m 19 weeks, so almost 5 months. I’ve had a noticeable bump since about 15 weeks. I’m 5”1 and a size 10 with narrow hips, so baby has nowhere to go but forwards. This is my first. Think it depends on your shape etc. Dress you’re describing may we’ll cover a 3-4 month bump though x

My bump didn't really show properly until about 18 weeks, but I was so bloated in the first trimester that I looked more pregnant than I was from about 10 weeks onwards. I've had friends who have barely had a bump at 30+ weeks.

I would say plan for the worst then anything from there is a bonus. So get a dress you'd be happy to have a bump in, it's easier to take a dress in than it is to let it out!

Thanks so much ladies! I know all responses have varied massively but it has been helpful. I'm carrying a little bit of a tummy anyway so I do think I would be showing but every time I think of delaying it, I'm so disappointed. Hubby-to-be is happy either way (though he's aware I'm the one who could look chunky on our wedding day).

It might not even happen for us straight away so it is an absolute blessing if it does. Also, my dress is a corset at the back and I don't think has a zip and certainly no buttons so I'm hoping maybe I could get away with the size of the dress and adjustments. The dress is in shop and ready but I haven't had it altered yet so hopefully they made it a tad too big anyway.

It is so difficult to decide what to do but even by July I don't see us getting our big wedding (not trying to be negative but I am a realist) so part of us is going feck it, let's try and see what happens and roll with it. We are unbelievably broody and feel ready 😊 (with a few fears along the way of course!) xxxx

This is not me in it (just slightly curvier at the hips) but this is the dress, if that helps.

I got married when I was 17 weeks.
I had a small bump but could easily hide in dress.
That being said, when i went shopping for the dress i noticed i had to accommodate for big boobs (pregnancy hormones) and could not stand corsets. So had to have a flowy dress from chest down to feel comfortable.

@LilyRose202
I tried dresses like yours - beautiful btw!
But it was just so uncomfortable. I felt dizzy just trying it!!! Because i couldn't breathe properly and felt squished around the waist/tummy...

It's impossible to know really. I'm currently 10 weeks and already have a similar size bump to a good friend who is a lot small in waist and height than me does at 21 weeks (although I was also massive with my first!) Agree with PP, if you're ready to TTC, don't put it off just because of a wedding as you just never know what could happen, nothing wrong with having a bump visible in wedding photos either. Good luck whatever you decide.

That dress is beautiful - but I would've been very uncomfortable in it at 4.5 months. I didn't have a massive baby bump at that point but was bloated and sick and wouldn't have wanted anything pushing on my tummy where that dress curves in. Obviously entirely up to you and as you say it might not happen straight away and not worth putting off your wedding but do you like any of the styles with a slightly higher or less structured waistline? Or are you very willing to put up with being uncomfortable on your wedding day to look how you imagined (some women absolutely are and good luck to them!) Comfort was the no1 priority for me - I even had flat shoes (sparkly trainers) which shocked everyone (not sure why!) and loved it - I could actually run in my dress (and did!) and was still dancing the night away after 12 hours in the whole getup. I am 5ft9 though which might make a difference!

Absolutely nothing at all wrong with getting married/bridesmaid whilst pregnant, but you won't want to wear that dress! Get something empire line.
I'm bridesmaid for a good friend later this year and will be 20 ish weeks. Luckily it's empire line and it will be fine based on what size I was last preg at 20 weeks (assuming I'm not carrying twins)...

I went to a christening at 12 weeks and it was obvious to my friends. By 20 weeks I was huge. I’m quite slight and each pregnancy I’ve been whale like very early on!

I'm 5'4 and was a size 10-12 in my first pregnancy and didn't show until about 24 weeks.

I didn’t get a bump until 18 weeks but I was bloated before that.

I might "fit" in that dress right now (19weeks) for a photo shoot but I absolutely couldn't eat or do it for long. The top of my uterus is just under my belly button so I'm firm for there down and all my insides that were there have shifted up a bit, not a lot of stomach room.

Okay, good to know. Thanks.
Not sure where that leaves me 😔 but I did ask, haha!
Everyone is very different but good to know what could potentially be the case and I guess we'll mull it over and take it from there. Wedding dresses don't come cheap and with lockdown still in play til God knows when, getting another dress is out of the question. So we'll need to weigh up delaying TTC or going for it with potential discomfort. This is all assuming it happens straight away which again, can't be guaranteed! I'm back in work next week so hopefully that will distract me from thinking about babies 24/7.
I appreciate the time everyone has taken to share their experiences. Now I better mull things over a bit. Thanks

I'm not sure how you'd feel about it, but even skipping a cycle would push you back another 4 weeks so you'd be about 3.5 instead of 4.5 months - this is likely to make a big difference to the amount of comfort you'd feel on the day. I know I felt like I ballooned all of a sudden a few weeks into the second trimester, that could be a compromise? Then if it doesn't happen on the first month you'd be in a more comfortable position again

@PlanBea Hi, yes this is a good idea and we're definitely considering that. Thanks for the advice! X

@LilyRose202 I have a dress similar to yours and I'm getting married on the 16th April at nearly 37 weeks! I wouldn't worry too much about it now. If you do get pregnant, you can try on a few dresses and see what feels comfortable! I had to have some adjusting to the dress though and mine is a corset back as I felt that was the most accommodating. Obviously I can't do it really tight so you do lose a bit of shape. But if your only going to be 3/4 months you probably won't have much of a bump anyway.