What appointments have your partners been allowed to attend?

[EllieRosesMammy]

Just wondering what appointments everyones partners have been able to attend in recent weeks?

My partner couldnt attend my early bird app (which was fine cause he didnt miss much) and I dont think hes able to attend my booking app next week.

I believe hes allowed to attend our 12 week and 20 week scan, but in the following months things are about to change anyway so I'm assuming once shops and pubs reopen partners will be allowed to attend all appointments again?

What has everyone elses doctors surgery and hospital said?

Mine has only been allowed to my 20w scan but I believe they have extended this now to the 12w scan also. No other appointments apart from emergency and Labour.

Thanks for the replies ladies. Was just wondering how it differs at each place. Seems that most are allowing partners for 12 weeks and 20 week scans which is good. Couldnt imagine going to the 12 week scan alone especially after a MMC at almost 13 weeks for my last pregnancy. Hopefully nothing to worry about this time though.

Oh and I'm praying I dont need to be induced this time if the restrictions are still in place by October. When I was induced with my daughter it took days for anything to happen. And then when I finally started having contractions they were every few minutes for 10 hours with next to no dilation. Couldnt imagine doing all that without my partner there :(

DH is allowed to 12 and 20 week scan but not 36 week (I'm aware that's not a routine one but it is for Oxfordshire). We are only 10w so I expect he will be allowed to the 36w by the time it comes around. If we have a loss he is also allowed to be with me through it.

I'm not actually sure for the birth yet but given we aren't due until the end of September it doesn't make sense to worry too much. He will hopefully be vaccinated by then anyway.

All midwife appointments are on my own but they don't seem to need him there anyway to be honest.

He's allowed at 12 and 20 week scans but not midwife/consultant appointments or growth scans, although to be honest I'm not really bothered about that as he's there for the main ones. When I have the baby he'll be able to stay with me from admission to discharge (but won't be allowed to leave the ensuite room and has to bring all his own food). I really feel for people giving birth at trusts which are being stricter.

I was lucky with how timings worked out - he could come to both scans as they'd just started allowing 12 week scans when I had mine. I had to go in alone for reduced movements and for the checks on whether my waters had broken (they had) and then later whether I was in active labour now (I was) and then was with me from then until discharge six hours after birth - he'd have had to leave if I'd gone to postnatal ward, though.

Tbh I was always amazed in my first pregnancy to see that some of the other women seemed to bring their partners to every community midwife appointment - did they not work?! It would feel like taking DH to a GP appointment, just a bit weird. I also went to the growth scans and my twice weekly monitoring alone when I was pregnant with DS1 as DH was at work so while I was very lucky and grateful not to need them this time as it was a more straightforward pregnancy I wouldn't have been upset about going alone.

12 and 20 week scan, all labour and birth. Once I've gone to the ward he's not allowed to visit at all.
Not allowed to day unit if reduced movements etc.
I wouldn't take him to midwife or consultant apps anyway as they are boring.

I'm 30 weeks FTM and my partner hasn't been allowed to anything. Our hospital is still running strict rules that partners are not allowed in until you're 4cm dilated which is madness

12 & 20 weeks scan. As others have said I don't think he's allowed to my midwife appointments but I wouldn't have had him there anyway.

I have additional scans at 24, 28, 32 and 36 and he's not allowed to come with me for those.

I've just checked and at my hospital he's not allowed in for early labour but if I'm induced he is allowed in for the whole induction. I think we have to isolate before if it's a planned induction / c section. After the birth it's one visitor but no time restrictions outside of what was allowed before.

12 week & 20 week scan.

Midwife appointments wasn't allowed

None, I'm in Germany. No extra people at medical appointments unless absolutely necessary, e.g. If accompanying a child or frail elderly person or person with special needs. And then only one.

None.

Not even when I was told there was no heartbeat.

Not when I had to have surgery because the “products of pregnancy” were stuck.

Not when I had to keep returning every two weeks - after surgery - for several months, because surgery didn’t clear all the retained products.

We were not in lockdown at the time. I had to deal with all of it alone.

Do you/partners need to wear mask during labour?

@tippytaps im so sorry you had to go through that on your own

Glasgow here. My husband came to early scans at 4,6 & 9 weeks (due to previous ectopic) in August but that was before we went into tier 4/lockdown.

Since lockdown or tightening of rules for hospital visits he's only been to the 12 & 20 week scan

DH would have been allowed to my 12 week scan.

But I ended up having to go in just a few days before hand after some concerns and he wasn't allowed to come.

I was on my own when they told me our baby had died. I was then left in the room totally alone, half naked with the internal ultrasound probe still inserted and my baby on the screen, for about 5 mins while the sonographer went to get someone else to confirm there was no heartbeat.

The single most traumatic thing I've ever been through.

Sorry OP, that wasn't a very reassuring post!

I think most places are allowing partners to 12 and 20 week scans and they are lifting more restrictions too so if you're earlyish pregnancy now then I reckon you'll find that he's allowed to more and more as your pregnancy progresses.

Good luck with everything

Zero scans, my hospital still isn’t allowing any partners at scans.

I’m under the Homebirth team so the midwife comes to my house for appointments so DH had been able to hear babies heartbeat on the Doppler.

If I do need to go into hospital for/after delivery DH will not be allowed on the postnatal ward at all. In due early June so hoping that changes as that really worries me. I have mobility issues around carrying and lifting and so rely on DH heavily as it. Issues will not be clear from looking at me eg. I’m not in a wheelchair so I’m really concerned about how I’ll cope if staff are busy.

Only the 20 week scan. I’ve had 8 scans and 12 other appointments since then and he’s not allowed with me for any of it. He’s also not allowed with me until I’m in established labour not is he allowed on the postnatal ward should I go there rather than straight home. No visiting on the antenatal ward either and he’s only allowed to wait outside main reception once me and baby are allowed to go home. Sounds like a right barrel of laughs carrying your bags and a new baby 3 floors down shortly after giving birth. Especially as they are only allowing wheelchair/bed ridden patients to use the lifts to avoid creating queues as only one allowed in at once.

He’s also not allowed to attend any of my appointments after baby is born either. I cannot even begin to tell you how bloody angry and terrified I am at the idea of doing it entirely alone. And this is my third. Imagine how horrific it would be if it were your first and you were this isolated from all your support. It’s utterly barbaric.

My Dh was allowed to come to 12 and 20 week scans similar to others.
He is also allowed to come to my induction - from beginning to end - and stay overnight with me where necessary.
Every hospital seems to be different so check what yours is doing for birth and I’d really expect things to have changed by October too.

12 and 20 week scans he was allowed.

I'm having extra growth scans and partner's aren't allowed.

He wouldn't be able to come to any more appointments anyway as he will be working.

Strange how different Trusts have different rules.

DH has come to both scans. Not allowed to attend midwife appointments but he’s at work any way.

Wasn’t allowed to visit me on the gynae ward but I was allowed to meet him at the door when he handed me an overnight bag. Wasn’t allowed on the MAU.

He can be there when I go in to give birth. He can visit 3 hours a day on the post natal ward if I’m admitted. If discharged after the birth, he can stay until we go home.

@NoParticularPattern so sorry that’s happening. I’m surprised they’re even allowed to have those rules in place, it’s not right . It’s really unbelievable they’re expecting mothers to cope alone in that way. I hope everything goes really smoothly and well for you and you don’t have to stay long in the postnatal ward.

None. We booked a private scan at about 9 weeks so he could come to that. Not allowed in for either hospital scan.
I never understand why partners would want to go to midwife apps, they are short and dull.
This is my second and Dh didn’t go to any appointments other than scans last time round either.
Birth he can be with me as my hospital is all private rooms