Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

Original poster

Is anyone else's husband kicking up a fuss about going to NCT classes?

13 replies

PurlyQueen · 05/11/2007 13:27

I mentioned that I'd booked us in for a course of NCT classes. You'd have thought that I'd booked him in at the dentist! He started moaning that he 'doesn't like that kind of thing' He is coming, but only reluctantly as he (I think) refuses to admit that he's scared of being in the delivery room.

Has any one else's partners made a fuss about going to antenatal classes/being your birth partner?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TheQueenOfQuotes · 05/11/2007 13:30

DH never came to any of my antenatal classes....but was there at all 3 deliveries

TheOldestCat · 05/11/2007 13:36

Had to respond to this.

My very cynical DH was just the same. I got him to come, mutteringly darkly, 'if there's the merest whiff of role play, I'm off".

He ended up loving it.

And I agree it was fear of the delivery room in part. But once the NCT teacher let him know that he didn't have to cut the cord if he didn't want to, he was much better.

My favourite part of the labour (other than holding DD for the first time!) was watching DH turn green as the midwive gave us a running commentary as she checked the delivered placenta....

StarlightMcKenzie · 05/11/2007 13:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Wizzska · 05/11/2007 15:58

My DH hates them. Don't blame him, they are Sh*t, but I've been trying to explain to him what its like to have a bump growing really huge inside you and that at some point it will very painfully try to get out! And when it does, I'll need him not to faint if he has to help me.

SueW · 05/11/2007 16:00

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at OP's request.

freakypenguin · 05/11/2007 16:06

My DH was only permitted at the first class due to space - and that had a specific focus on 'couples' and 'becoming a dad'. After that it was women only for the actual delivery stuff, breastfeeding etc...

TBH I think attending the scans and check-ups at the hospital are more useful for the men than the ante-natal classes anyway.

annieshaf · 05/11/2007 21:31

Hi
My DH was exactly the same about attending NCT classes. Was very reluctant to go and did miss a few due to work commitments. However after the event he did admit that he found them useful. I have kept in touch with most of the other mums in the class and we meet up once a month. In the summer we have a BBQ and around Xmas (when all our little ones also have birthdays) we have a joint birthday party when dads come to and he has always made an effort to come and keep in touch. (very unusal for my DH as he is not a socialite).

If he has agreed to go albeit reluctantly i would just accept that as a result and let the classes speak for themselves. He may not appreciate the benefit until after the birth either so dont expect him to change his mind after the first class.

Hope this helps.

cece · 05/11/2007 21:39

We went to the ones run by the hospital. DH attended reluctantly. mainly because his friend told him at his one the men were allowed to leave the room for the video of a birth. Our class came and the time for the video came. Midwife asked if anyone wanted to leave.... No one did... DH too embarassed to be the only one to leave so had to sit through whole video.. I laughed so hard I was crying... Think midwife thought I was crying with fear...

Pruners · 05/11/2007 21:46

Message withdrawn

beeper · 05/11/2007 22:57

To be honest I think that watching videos of women giving birth is disturbing...after all non of us, even mums never really have to see the full impact of whats going on at the 'business end' and the thought of looking at a strangers fanjo gives me the creeps.

harpsichordsgoingbangandwoosh · 05/11/2007 23:01

jut wanted to add I am an antenatal teacher for the NCT (though hopefully not a shit one ) and lots of men are reluctant attenders! and NCT teachers are used to it and will have strategies for dealing with it and hopefully making the experience more positive.
and no NCT teacher I know shows a birth video tbh

Ellbell · 05/11/2007 23:10

Ladies, ladies... don't take 'em.

My dh asked where exactly you were supposed to put the pineapple.

mistlethrush · 05/11/2007 23:30

Our NCT classes were really useful. Quite often men and women split into different groups - which got the different expectations across.

However, so glad I went - when things didn't quite go to plan (OK, plan went out of the window and fell down a very big hole somewhere), the information I had received at the NCT classes made me feel that I could still make an informed decision, and/or at least knew what to expect and why it was happening.

He needs to be there to help you make the best decision for you and your dc.

If he doesn't go, he won't be able to help you as much - and he won't be prepared for what is happening if things don't go quite to plan.

Also a good way to introduce concept of nappy changes and what to expect!

Flip