Mean things said to partner.

[Allloveandlight]

Hello, I just wanted to make a thread wondering if anyone has been the same whilst pregnant? I’m 12 weeks and I feel like I’m having just a tough time at the minute, everything is seeming to set me off and I’m just losing my cool over the silliest things (I’m not like being physical or screaming shouting, I just don’t have patience at the minute) I’m usually really chilled out and things don’t get to me at all but the last few weeks I’ve feel like I’ve done a whole 180 and everything is getting on my nerves, plus being stuck in this house is not helping at all I don’t think.
My DP is brilliant I can’t fault him at all and I love him more than anything and we rarely argue, I’m not saying we don’t at all because what couple doesn’t? But lately we’ll get into little bickers and I just end up saying all these really horrible things to hurt his feelings in the moment (which I’ve never done before at all) and it’s eating me away, I’m really not thinking of what I’m saying at all and I’m just blurt out the things I know will hurt his feelings and I honestly feel like the worst person in the world at the moment.
I was just wondering if anyone else has felt/feeling like this while pregnant or do I need to get some sort of counselling?
Thanks.

I forgot to add I do suffer with really high anxiety anyways and that can make me irritable but not to this point where I’m saying really hurtful things that I can’t take back for the sake of it? I regret it as soon as I say it the words just come out and I’ve never been like this before so I really really don’t know where this is coming from, I’m honestly the worst person at the moment.

I think for a start give yourself a break - hormones make you crazy. But you've recognised that there are times you're taking it too far, can you not explain to him everything you have just wrote. I think there have been weeks where I've been way too short with my husband so don't feel you need to jump to counselling.

@Helenknowsbest thank you so much, I want to put it down to the hormones but then I start to think maybe this is me now and I’m hating the new me at the moment, I’m saying all these awful awful things to him and I can see he’s hurt then I feel like the worst person for hurting the person I love most and I’ve never been like this before and it’s really started out of thin air and I can’t stop myself it’s horrible.
Yeah that’s a really good idea to explain what I’ve just written now to him, I just feel like sorry isn’t enough after being so venomous with my words 😔
Thank you for the reassurance, I just didn’t want to feel like I’m the only one that this has happened to where Ive just done a full 180 with my temper and words, thank you again.

I had a very calm, laid back pregnancy I think I slept for most of it!
It is fairly normal I think. Your hormones are going nuts, do you get enough time to relax, bath, book, bed. You probably need to tell him what you’ve typed here and tell him to ignore you and that you don’t really mean it but you have unexplained anger! I do get somewhat irritable when I get my period and DH knows and makes a joke of it and it takes some of the stress and irritability away.

@Suzi888 thank you! Sounds like you had the ideal pregnancy! I was like that up until 2 weeks ago and I had this awful feeling like a dark cloud being over me. At the moment I’m not I feel like I’m constantly on the go or my mind is and I’m not giving time for myself and then I’m finding at the end of the day everything is making me want to snap even down to the dishes not being done and I was never like that before at all, I would usually just let things go over my head!
I’ve never snapped like this before or said these awful things, I don’t even want to type them as I feel so ashamed of myself it’s beyond because this is not me, so to see his face when I said these things has broken me. Sorry I keep going on I just feel a little bit lost at the moment.
That’s a really good way of dealing with things! To make a little inside joke about it, I just don’t know how to deal with it because I’ve never had to deal with this side of me before ever so I’m struggling with the new serge of anger and impatience, sorry this is a lot I just feel like I needed somewhere to get this off my chest. Thank you again.

I’m 27 weeks and I’ve found that the last... maybe 10 weeks I’ve been a complete cos to DP. I think it’s hormones if I’m honest because I know I adore him, we just moved in together & newly engaged but maaaan, he does my head in!! I too have bad anxiety and I like my own space so I snap when he gets in my space. I feel awful too but I know I adore him. You aren’t being nasty because you want to be, I really do believe pregnancy hormones change you so much.

Just make sure you tell him every now & then that you love him (spontaneously) and aren’t feeling yourself lately but that has nothing to do with him. I do try and reassure because I know he takes things to heart.

I definitely meant to say cow not cos .. my bad *^

Don't be too hard on yourself, we've all done it and it is definitely hormones not a new you! I would just explain you're feeling out of sorts recently and snapping at things that usually don't annoy you. Apologise for what you said and tell him you don't really mean what you say in the heat of the moment.

I think you also need to start checking in on yourself and begin to recognise what's upsetting you and when. Eg is it after long work days or where you haven't sat down all day as you've been running errands - this way you can recognise when you're likely to snap and make some time for you to help you relax and recover. Give him a heads up too so he can make you a cuppa and you can put your feet up for half an hour!

Hormones! I'm generally pretty chilled out, I went through a couple of weeks at 9/10 weeks where everything annoyed me. I had a melt down over bin bags! It will pass!

Thank you everyone, we’ve start down and spoke and he was really understand and he obviously spoke about how he felt and I just was broken all over again! But he’s so understanding and loving it’s bonkers haha.
Thank you all so much though for the advice and the reassurance that it isn’t just me and this isn’t a new thing that just happened haha, I’m hoping it passes really soon as I’m not enjoying this new me at all, it doesn’t feel right.
That’s a really good idea to recognise what might be triggering me, I’ll be keeping an eye on my patterns and hopefully see where it’s going wrong!
Thank you so much again it means a lot.

Sat Understanding I’m typing way too fast haha

It’s definitely hormones! That combined with sickness for the first 16 weeks made me really irritable! All fine now though. It won’t last x

@Reeva1988 thank you! I’m glad all is good now! I’ve had a nice pregnancy for the first 9-10 weeks but all changed the last couple of weeks but like you said it’ll pass so that’s what I’m hoping! Thank you again x