Terrible first experience with maternity services

[Rosieposy89]

Hi all. I'm just after advice/rant. I'm 9+6 first pregnancy. My telephone booking appointment was supposed to be today at 11. I phoned at 11.30 and was told the midwife had gone into a meeting and they don't know when it was due to finish. My husband phoned at 12 and was told I would get a call today but they can't say what time and they've 'fallen behind'. I have now had to take the whole day off as A/L because I'm client based so can't just take a call midway through dealing with a client. I have used the NHS multiple times due to a disability and have never experienced such poor service. I feel upset at being messed around and don't feel I can trust these people to keep me and baby safe. What do I do?

I’m sorry to say this but it is very much the norm for a huge number of NHS appointments to be late so you will struggle if you cannot work around these, as you will have lots of them throughout your pregnancy.

So far it’s only three hours late. I’ve waiting in the consultant waiting room a lot longer than that for an appointment in my pregnancies before.

I am currently 36 weeks and have unfortunately had a similar experience the whole way through my pregnancy. Today I had an appointment - went to my gp practice to see my midwife, waited half an hour and then the receptionist made a phone-call and I overheard her say ‘do you know where the midwife is today there are three people waiting for their appointments.’ We were all just sent he with an apology but no sign of them being rebooked. This kind of thing has happened to me a lot.

@Sixtyorforty

I am currently 36 weeks and have unfortunately had a similar experience the whole way through my pregnancy. Today I had an appointment - went to my gp practice to see my midwife, waited half an hour and then the receptionist made a phone-call and I overheard her say ‘do you know where the midwife is today there are three people waiting for their appointments.’ We were all just sent he with an apology but no sign of them being rebooked. This kind of thing has happened to me a lot.

Sometimes it because the midwife does home visits before going to the surgery and they can overrun. Once you give birth, if you have concerns or worries and the midwife visits at home (always happens in most trusts post c section) you’ll be grateful that you are able to have the time to chat.

Could have been an emergency meeting. These things happen.

Unfortunately it’s absolutely the norm, it wasn’t until my first call that never happened at all that I realised just how bad. The care in hospital at time of delivery is much different thankfully.

Terrible experience? Really??

You should really ask yourself if that was a terrible experience, because it’s really not that and that’s not even a matter of opinion.

If you don’t trust the NHS to deliver your baby safe and sound because they are late giving you a call to run through some questions, during the toughest time the NHS may ever go through in our life time, then go private.

I’m sure once you see the private prices for having a baby you’ll suck it up

Honestly it has happened to me so many times. The nhs is stretched as it is staff wise and midwives are very busy juggling their appointments, meetings etc. Obviously it is a pain, but I would really try to allow more time. Sometimes its better to book afternoon appointments so you can take the whole afternoon off. I've also had this happen at scan and consultant appointments just as a pre warning.

Potentially the midwife has been called to an an unplanned home birth, has been delayed by not being able to find the heartbeat of a baby and needing to comfort a mum, or has been in an appointment where a lady has disclosed sexual abuse. Personally i can't get too upset about delayed appointments when you think about the potential reasons for the delays

Unfortunately it's the norm.

They have to run on a schedule and sometimes things come up.
I had an hour and a half in the waiting room because my consultant had to deal with another issue.

It's just the case a lot of the time as you're not the only one they're dealing with

If I can choose the booking time for midwife appts etc I always go for first appt of the day with the hope that they can't be much behind unless had some sort of emergency to deal with.

It's inconvenient and not great that they haven't communicated better but I don't think it's a reflection on the overall safety of midwifery care.
My first booking in appt (precovid) I sat in the waiting room for over an hour as they were running over and there wasn't even a mention of it when I was finally called in. Thankfully since then my appointments across 2 pregnancies have pretty much been on time (maybe 10-15 mins late)

I would echo that the postnatal appointments were much better and I appreciate that more.

It’s inconvenient, it’s not a terrible experience at all. While pregnancy can be a vulnerable time, jumping ahead to your baby not being safe is very dramatic and unnecessary. They may be running late because they’re keeping another woman’s baby safe.

I was under a recurrent miscarriage clinic when I had my daughter and they told us to expect to wait up to 4 hours as anything could happen in those appointments. That was before covid and all the other stressors on the NHS. Having caused more than one long delay to the other women through my own disasters I was always happy to wait while another woman or couple were given the time they needed for theirs. I also caused hold ups in the scanning department, what can you do?

The booking appointment is a bunch of paperwork. It’s annoying for you that your work has been disrupted but this is the beginning of what will hopefully be a long, healthy, uneventful process. I had 3 midwife check ups at my GP surgery where the midwife wasn’t in the building for at least half an hour after I’d arrived. And I never saw the same midwife twice.

My delivery was exceptional and I never worried about the level of care I or my baby were getting. If an appointment running late is the worst thing that happens then you’re very fortunate.

I’m 39weeks pregnant now!

Don’t worry to much about the midwife appointments - i personally have had excellent care - and they always see me in time (only in person since 28weeks) the rest were phone calls

If you have an emergency or concerns though you are to just show up at triage and the midwives there will see you.

The midwife appointments you have every 2 weeks are just to check your urine, measure the bump, do blood pressure - check in basically

I really wouldn’t be getting to worked up about this - you will have to be flexible though - and your work has to accommodate that

I’m different to the others replying in that I have never had a late appointment and would be surprised now if I had to wait. It’s always been early or on time for scans and midwife appointments. It would annoy me too if no one got back to me and I was waiting for ages as surely the receptionist could call or send a message to say it’s likely to be much later. I agree with others though that it doesn’t reflect the quality of care you’ll receive when it matters as the first appointment is just questions that don’t take priority over other things the midwife might have had to prioritise.

I'm sorry to say but id get used to that.
It only worsens during the labour and birth experience, sorry to say.
Maternity care is shocking in this country.

If that's your only bad experience then you're lucky. I won't describe my maternity journey as wouldn't want to trigger anyone.

You probably already know this but you are allowed reasonable time off paid for antenatal appointments.

I know it was disappointing today. But try not to dwell on it. These things happen. I went for a scan and found out the appointment had been booked on an afternoon they didn't do appointments!

I think what you need to do is chill out and stop being so melodramatic.

They did state in my letter that their scheduled time on my letter was not guaranteed due to the nature of their services. I think you just have to be patient and show some understanding for an already strained service. They will get your booking app done and this will feel like a fuss over nothing.

It's unfortunate but late appointments are normal I'm afraid. I dont think I ever had an appointment on time when I was pregnant.

For the future it might be worth checking if your employer can give you paid time off for prenatal appointments without booking it as annual leave.

It also helps to take some snacks or a book to read to pass time.

Also, don't lose faith in their ability to keep you and your baby safe. The NHS do a fantastic job on the whole.

@Anywherebuthere

It's unfortunate but late appointments are normal I'm afraid. I dont think I ever had an appointment on time when I was pregnant.

For the future it might be worth checking if your employer can give you paid time off for prenatal appointments without booking it as annual leave.

It also helps to take some snacks or a book to read to pass time.

Book and snacks for in person/face to face appointments.

Very annoying and disappointing I'm sure! Not much seems to happen in the first trimester and when you finally have one of the exciting first events, it must feel very irritating to have it delayed.

However, NHS maternity services are extremely stretched and it's not until around 34 weeks that you see a midwife regularly. Also, until the 12 week scan has passed, they aren't generally interested until they know that a pregnancy is overwhelming viable, and that is the reality.

@Rosieposy89

Hi all. I'm just after advice/rant. I'm 9+6 first pregnancy. My telephone booking appointment was supposed to be today at 11. I phoned at 11.30 and was told the midwife had gone into a meeting and they don't know when it was due to finish. My husband phoned at 12 and was told I would get a call today but they can't say what time and they've 'fallen behind'. I have now had to take the whole day off as A/L because I'm client based so can't just take a call midway through dealing with a client. I have used the NHS multiple times due to a disability and have never experienced such poor service. I feel upset at being messed around and don't feel I can trust these people to keep me and baby safe. What do I do?

I feel exactly the same. As grateful as I am to have free healthcare, service isn't great at all and I worry about the quality of care when I do actually get it

My letter didn't say anything about it being an approximate time otherwise I would have booked the full day. I know you're allowed paid time off for maternity appointments but I think 6 hours is taking the piss a bit. Its more the fact they haven't bothered to communicate with me that infuriates me because actually it has had consequences for my work too and I'm lucky my manager is understanding. I'm not being melodramatic when I say it made me nervous for the rest of my care because this is literally my first appointment, I don't have anything else to judge it by.