Fed up. Please don’t judge!

[DottyDotty91]

I’m currently 9 weeks pregnant. Baby very much planned and wanted by both of us, I’ve been wanting a baby for ages it was just never the right time until now. We got pregnant on our first attempt so feeling very lucky.

But I’m utterly miserable. I hate being pregnant.
From 5 weeks I’ve been sick none stop. If I eat I throw up if I don’t eat I throw up. I wake up to be sick. I’m shattered, exhausted, constantly bloated (painfully so), I have a permanent headache and feel weak 24/7. I’m on anti sickness medication which helps but isn’t a cure. I haven’t even been able to go for my first lot of bloods, I carry a sick bucket everywhere I go, I cannot even work which means I’ve not earned for the last month which is only adding to the stress.

We’ve had an early scan last week and everything was fine. I of course dont want anything bad to happen but I feel like if it did, at least the bad stuff would be over. I feel like an awful person for thinking like that. I’ve already decided I’m not falling pregnant ever again.

I’m just so done

Totally feel for you OP I had really bad sickness & headaches too in my first trimester.

Just remember it's okay to not love your pregnancy / being pregnant, it's no reflection on how you feel about your baby. And once you've got your bubba, it will all have been worth it.

Hang in there, the sickness should hopefully subside as you move into your second trimester and you should start to feel more like yourself again.

Best wishes

I had medication too during my first few weeks.

DD is 8mo now.

My doctor said "Its good in a way as it means that baby is developing well"... it offered me zero comfort 😂

I empathise with you totally though... it is utterly miserable and really hard to enjoy it when you feel sick all the time.

Most likely, at about 12 or 13 weeks, it will ease off and go... you are so, so close and you will enjoy the 2nd trimester soooooo much more. 3rd trimester is plagued with tiredness and feeling like a whale all the time 😂

One day at a time OP, one day at a time

@DottyDotty91 please don't feel bad, it's a normal reaction. I'm 11 weeks 5 days pregnant with twins, and I've only been able to keep down any substantial amount of food and fluid since Wednesday. Prior to that I'd vomit if I'd had food and drink and even if I hadn't. I'd often vomit just water and loads of bile, so I know how miserable it is.

I'm also a migraine sufferer and I've suffered with some absolutely horrific headaches.
I'm only now starting to feel better but it was a rough few weeks from about 5 weeks onwards. Weeks 9 & 10 were the worst for me. I was so dehydrated my wee was orange and I had no energy. I was also on anti sickness meds which didn't really help to be honest, in fact nothing did. I've just had to ride it out BUT it does get better.

I spent many nights with my dd's old potty by my side of the bed in case I needed to throw up! 😂

Anyway, upshot is, it will get better and in a couple of weeks you will turn a corner x

It sounds grim, poor you. Can you ask the gp about other medication? I haven’t experienced it but I gather some women have to try several before finding something that works. I think there are pg sickness support threads on here too. Really hope you feel better soon

If you're on anti sickness then it's not working you must go back to the doctor and get the next one which is ondansetron. The GP also needs to check your urine to see if you're dehydrated If it's a GP like mine they have no idea how debilitating it is - 'just try some ginger biscuits/just try to eat something' . I also took DH in with me as I knew I'd get fobbed off. I did get cyclizine and it did stop the sickness but not the constant nausea or weakness. There is a hyperemesis thread on here with amazing support it really helped me as they give such great advice

I didn't choose the gin bottle emoji btw not sure what happened there!

Thank you so much for all the replies! Really appreciate them all

I’m tempted to call my dr on Monday or the midwife tomorrow and speak to her because I don’t know how much more I can go on.. I’m just so miserable
I’m concerned about changing medication as the one I’m on now has no known effect on the baby but I’ve read others have a risk and I’d rather avoid that risk!

@Tamalama that sounds absolutely awful! You and the potty sound like me and my bin
12 weeks seems like such a long way off though it really does

@PlinkPlink I’ve also been told that from friends but like you it offers zero comfort when I’m being sick or feeling sick 24/7!

@Lottie917 thank you. I feel awful not loving the experience as so many people struggle to even fall pregnant but I just can’t help it.

@DottyDotty91 I feel like I could have written this myself. Baby #3 for me. Been obsessing about another baby for over a year, it finally happened and I’m 8 weeks but oh my am I miserable. Feel really negative and like you I keep thinking if anything bad did happen I don’t know how upset I’d really be. Have been having 24/7 nausea since week 5, haven’t had a proper meal in 3 weeks because I feel so sick. On top of having 2 other kids to home school and working full time at home my body and brain is just in complete overdrive and I’m really overwhelmed and keep thinking I’ve made a big mistake. I’m also suddenly terrified of managing 3 kids and how hard it will be.

Sorry no advice from me but just know you’re not alone and I for one feel exactly the same as you at this stage.

There's usually a HG thread on here... I know you're not suffering with Hyperemesis atm but there were some great bits of advice on there...

Different foods and drink that might help/be less throw-up-able...

Its such an awful feeling and I defy anyone to feel joyous and elated when they feel like they're about to vomit, all day long.

I found pregnancy the worst! HG sickness and when that finishes gestational diabetes!!! Feel sick, tired, washed out, woozy all the time.... all I can say is it's so worth it! And it's amazing how quick your body forgets, you forget! Keep at it, pregnancy in my experience is a disease but wow the outcome is priceless! X

I'm on my sixth pregnancy (one successful, four miscarriages) and there were so many times I thought why put your body through it?!!! But what's worth having is never easy! X

Call your doc they can give you medication that makes it better.... and if the first doesn't work there are others... it took three changes of mess before I found the one to cope with HG. And if it gets so bad you can't hold fluid down ring 111. A night in hospital on a drip can make a huge difference

I understand completely op. I hate being pregnant as I'm always sick and I get severe pregnancy related illness (different ones each time)
After 5 pregnancies and 2 babies I'm done but that being said I absolutely adore my children so pregnancy is no reflection on how you feel about your babies.
However if you really are struggling then you may need different meds to control the sickness. I had cyclzine for 2 of my pregnancies and it was pretty useless. I moved to odansatron for my last one and it was like night and day. The liver specialists moved me onto it due to an ongoing condition but it works wonders. It has a tiny chance of cleft lip and pallet but a starving, dehydrated mother is a bigger risk to the baby than the meds

It sounds like you have HG
I had it in my first pregnancy and it’s horrific! You have my deepest sympathy but not a lot can be done. I tried every med going and it didn’t stop until I gave birth.

Luckily with number 2 it’s eased significantly from 14 weeks but those first weeks were hell.

You can learn to cope, the HG support boards are full of advice on what/what not to eat and ways to push through. On the other hand lots of women who suffer HG do choose not to continue pregnancies because of it. There is a lot written on the topic if you google.

People who haven't had it don’t generally understand it’s like horrific noro virus that doesn’t stop for months.

good luck and whatever you do just make sure it’s right for you and don’t feel bad about feeling sorry for yourself. HG pregnancies are not ‘normal’ pregnancies. Don’t pay attention when Nancy from HR tells you how sick she was too but she managed to work FT throughout and go on two long haul holidays anyway... Nancy did not have a HG pregnancy, Nancy just had a bit of pregnancy sickness!

I completely sympathise with you as I know how you feel. I'm pregnant with my second and the sickness is exactly as bad as it was the first time. I throw up all the time, every single smell drives me insane and I'm just so miserable.
I've said to DH we're not having any more babies after this. I can't do this a third time. I hate being pregnant but absolutely love the end result. It's all worth it in the end but it's the most gruelling 40 weeks of my life.
Unfortunately my sickness lasted the entire pregnancy with my last so I'm expecting the worst 😞😞

Good luck to you and hang in there. It does feel slightly better once you hit 20 weeks and up. Sending positive vibes x

Oh Gosh this is so nice to hear! I mean not for you, just for me cause I feel less alone!

I’m in a similar situation, I’ve been wanting this baby for 10 years but it was never the right time (wrong partner, then single, then kept changing jobs). I’ve finally convinced my boyfriend of 5 years to start trying and it worked the first month although we’re both 35! That was quite a (happy) shock.

I’m 7 weeks now and I’m hating it! I’m beyond nauseous all day long, I have developed an aversion to pretty much all foods including water, I feel exhausted and weak, faint, I’ve started vomiting earlier this week... Work is really busy atm but I’m struggling because my head is not in it and I don’t have the energy for it. I can’t tell them obviously and I can’t share any of this with anybody.

And I can’t even really be happy about the baby yet because a part of me is so terrified of losing it that I’m refraining myself for thinking past the 12 weeks mark. So I don’t even feel it’s worth it atm.

I keep praying I don’t lose it because I don’t want to go through this again

And there’s still 5 weeks to go... although I don’t expect all these issues to magically disappear at 12 weeks...

I don’t feel I was prepared for any of this...

@Lille4 that sounds awful I suppose you’re expecting the same to happen this pregnancy, as in sickness all the way through, considering it happened in your last one! I hope that’s not the case and it eases up for you. It’s awful

Here with you OP in fact im pretty sure I post a similar question about 20 weeks ago, sitting in tears in lure dispair. I suffered nausea but seldom sick, very tired too but omg the headache it was like one long, constant headache that just moved all about my head, down my neck and behind my eyes which wouldnt go away. Please just remember it will pass, it probably wont be tomorrow or the next weeks but trust me it passes. Im now 28 weeks and have been feeling usually good feom about 16/17 weeks. The third trimester is starting now amd just the sheer size of bump is going to become the issue soon but give me the uncomfortable/sore feelings of the third trimester than the first trimester any day. Good Luck OP it will be a memory soon enough!

Sorry typos pure*

I thought I wouldn’t ever get pregnant again. Granted you sound like you are having it worse. Hopefully in your second trimester things get better. They do for most women.

I’m exactly the same 😫 I’ve had the worst nausea 24/7 literally since implantation. I didn’t realise how much I’d hate being pregnant. Currently 9 weeks and have just spent another full day lying in bed. I’ve only actually been sick a few times, I just feel like I’m constantly sea sick. Praying for a miracle of things clearing up in a few weeks as I’m feeling seriously fed up!! 😢 xxx

@DottyDotty91 I spoke too soon! My morning sickness came back with a vengeance on Saturday night and now I'm struggling to keep anything down again, even water. I had about 3 days where I was eating all the food and I thought I was turning a corner. Now I'm back to feeling like shit and having headaches again. The joys of pregnancy!

I'm 12 weeks today and I have my scan next Monday... how are you feeling?

@Tamalama oh no you have all my sympathy! Sorry to hear it’s returned, It’s absolutely horrid. Have you contacted your midwife or EPU? Or tried any anti sickness?

I’m okay just feeling the same though I’m going to try and change my anti sickness meds because the stuff I’m on doesn’t seem to be much help and it’s been a couple of weeks now. I really dislike being pregnant...

@DottyDotty91 yep I'm on a second lot of anti sickness tablets which I've been on for about 3 weeks but they're not doing much either. The midwife and gp have both said that as long as I'm passing urine every 12 hours (which I am) then there isn't much I can do. Just to eat little and often (I have no desire to eat!)
I had a MC at 5.5 weeks 2 years ago so I keep trying to remind myself that being sick is a good sign, etc. It's tough though...

@DottyDotty91 @Tamalama
Is it me or are GPs/ midwives not so concerned about nausea/vomiting? I know it’s ‘normal’ and most women go through it, but it’s almost like we are less of a woman if we ask for help and we should just suck it up and suffer in silence? If there are medicines that are safe and that can help, we shouldn’t feel bad for taking them...

@MissMarion yep I completely agree!