Just found out I’m pregnant with number 2

[Noodlenoodle9]

We weren’t trying and have been using protection but seems err “one slipped the net”. Our little girl has just turned 1, is a lovely little being and just started walking. We said we’d discuss potential siblings at the end of this year as even though we conceived #1 rather quickly we were also aware that even healthy couples can take up to a year to conceive so would have discussed then whether we a) were ready for a sibling and b) if to start trying then or in X amount of time or ultimately c) whether we’d explore other options due to the trauma of #1’s birth.

I lost my job during maternity leave and claim UC to top up what my partner brings home. Essentially it is more than if I hadn’t lost my job as I don’t need to pay for nursery which would have cost my whole salary. We get by, the rent and all bills are paid and and we have a bit of savings. The aim is to do lots of online training and courses and try reimmerse myself into the working world when this has (hopefully) died down a bit.

I’m so torn and just trying to get my head around this. This baby will be welcomed into a very loving home and I know I am so lucky to be in this position but I think I feel a little blindsided and can’t think straight. Will I be offering the best this baby can have when I am out of work? :(

Has anyone been in the same position and willing to impart some advice to me? Positive or negative, how did you find having a second? Did you plan him/her? I know nobody can make this decision for me but although I’m in a very loving relationship I’m feeling so scared. What if I can’t handle 2 (quite) close in age?

I found out I was pregnant again when my daughter was coming up to 11 months. We had started trying but expected it to take a lot longer and my first thought was ‘Shit, what were we thinking!’ I was pretty terrified of the close age gap and had only just returned to work full time after maternity. The pregnancy was hard having a very young child and working full time as a teacher but all turned out ok in the end. You may find that not working during this time allows you to build up your skills like you said and be in a better position to return to work when you decide to.

My two are very close and my eldest started school in September. It was intense in the younger years but nothing you have said makes me think you are not prepared but as always, any decision you make has to be your own and there is no right or wrong.

2 close in age is tiring but not all that bad.
Trust me if you want to make it work you will do.

We're expecting #6 atm. When I was pregnant with #2 I was made redundant and then got pregnant with #3 before my maternity allowance ended so we decided it was financially best for me to be a sahm. It's not easy being a one income family but you soon figure out how to stretch your funds.

I found out I was pregnant with number 2 when number 1 was 6 months old!! Initial thoughts were also "shit what have we done.." but that turned to excitement and I looked at all the positives of having them so close in age.

I think there's pros and cons to every age gap, there's no perfect gap. So embrace the craziness!

@Whereland I am in this boat right now!! Must be mad! How was it??

@ReassureMee you know what it was mostly fine. Second baby was quite a chilled baby so he'd sleep while we were out and about walking etc. So the first 6 months were ok (albeit exhausted as they were both not great sleepers..). I found it difficult when they were 1 and 2, both needed constant supervision. Now they're 3 and 2 finding it a bit easier again, they play together and the 3 year old isn't as wild as he was..
so basically enjoy while the new baby can't move yet!!