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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

pregnant communters?

75 replies

tyaca · 31/10/2007 21:44

aggghhhhhhh!

its killing me. i can just about cope with work, but the 2 1/2 round trip is close to finishing me off....think someday someone's going to find me asleep on a platform at clapham junction.....

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coleyboy · 31/10/2007 21:48

How many weeks are you tyaca?

If you are early on, it does get better (although it doesn't feel like it at the time).

If you are getting towards the end, daydreams of maternity leave may get you through the day!

MitfordSisters · 31/10/2007 22:00

feel your pain tyaca. do you get a seat?

Alva · 31/10/2007 22:10

When I was doing a commute by rail while pregnant I was constantly being told by the guards to sit in first class - doesn't make the trip go any faster, but it can make it more pleasant!

KbearYourPoppywithPride · 31/10/2007 22:13

That's a helluva journey when you're not pg! Agree with coleyboy, you will start to feel normal again after 12 weeks - don't expect a seat but don't be afraid to ask for one either. Always start wih, "would anyone mind terribly letting me have a seat before I'm sick"... that works.

All the best from a fellow London commuter!

Original poster
tyaca · 31/10/2007 22:15

coleyboy - 22wks and this seems to be the most tiring bit so far....

mitfordsi's - don't show enough! i'm getting quite ruthless and just barging my way to a seat....

alva - no first class in the bucket trains i get in london outskirts, or on tube ;-( lucky you tho for the first class seat, almost worth stuffing a bump up jumper of a morning....

worst part for me is when i miss a connection, or a trains cancelled. it's like, i'm tired, i'm late, it's dark and I'M NOT EVEN GOING ANYWHERE

grrrrrrrr

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Original poster
tyaca · 31/10/2007 22:17

re dreams of maternity leave, instead i've spent the euromillions jackpot a thousand times.... never even entered before i got pg

OP posts:
coleyboy · 31/10/2007 22:18

Hmmmm, bummer. Can you change your hours to miss rush hour? Or do some work from home?

fondant4000 · 31/10/2007 22:19

Best way to get a seat is to take a pg magazine or book on the train with you - so no-one thinks you're just fat not pg and too nervous to offer their seat!

When you get the seat, put book away and take out your copy of War and Peace or whatever .

Original poster
tyaca · 31/10/2007 22:46

lol fondant - the ONE time i was offered a seat, i felt so sheepish accepting it i couldn't get out my book and relax ... fake snoozed instead.

OP posts:
butterscotch · 31/10/2007 23:19

If you do travel first class you have to get a letter from the train company first or you can get fined i assumed and as I hadn't written off to the rail company with my Mat1B form I got fined .

i gave up work a week earlier because I had an arguement with an a*hole on the train who typical male commuter spread onto my seat and was elbowing me (I was 36 weeks pregnant kinda obvious) and when I asked him to stop he had a massive go at me everyone on the train averted their eyes he got off the stop before me as soon as he got off (before getting off he had another go at me) I burst into tears that was my I don't want to commute while pregnant again thing....

He was having a go becuase he kept edging on my seat and my trousers were shining horrid maternity type horrid to look at but ohhh so comfy and I had to keep bouncing back into the seat as being elbowed and thrown around, and the train was packed I was mortified that I was shouted at obvioulsy pregnant but nobody said a word, the station guard at my station said I would raise a complaint and if I could identify him the british transport police could take it up (as he elbowed me quite hard in the stomach at one stage) but I was too scared and didn't want the hassle iykwim? Personally I would be late and not stress it they can hardly sack you for being late when pregnant I would also tell your boss when I told my boss what had happened to me and offered to work from home my last week he was like no don't worry about it (my other team leader who shares shifts with me) was on leave the week I left early (we aren't allowed to be on leave same time) being pregnant you have loads of rights look into it! |good luck for a happy and healthy pregnancy

ninedragons · 01/11/2007 04:00

Wow, there really are some arseholes out there!

beller · 01/11/2007 09:17

im 32 weeks pregnant and have a 2 hour round trip..so I do sympathise....Luckily bump is big enough to see though..so always get a seat, and have written off to the train firm , so can sit in first class. I have 17 working days left til mat leave woo-hoo!

Have you spoken to work Tyaca about maybe cutting hours, or changing travelling times to suit better connections? Thinking of you xx

Butterscotch..thats a terrible story!! Shame on the man..and shame on nobody coming to your defence! xx

violeta · 01/11/2007 09:51

Tyaca, that sounds like an absolute nightmare. I commute 40 mins each way on the tube and that feels enough for me (am 24 weeks). Can you speak to your boss and adjust your hours maybe to avoid the worst of rush hour? That may well help things...

What I hate is coming off a tube to hoards of commuters barging their way on. I nearly burst into tears this morning (hmm, hormones!) because it was so horrible... But I do mostly get a seat if I can get into an aisle which is good.

ninedragons · 01/11/2007 10:00

I physically yanked someone out of a taxi when I was about 20 weeks along. I'd been waiting forever, it was dark and raining, and when a cab finally stopped this man just ran past me and dived into the back. I thought ack! You shit! and seized him by the arm and pulled him out and dropped him on his bum on the street. He was shocked but I drove off chortling to myself and thinking hmm, I can't quite believe I just did that.

I hope when his wife gets pregnant she gets varicose veins the size of bridge support cables.

MrsArchieTheInventor · 01/11/2007 10:12

There really are some complete bastards out there, both men and women, who think you're fair game when you're pregnant because your slower than they are and if you make a fuss then it's bound to be your hormones making you all irrational.

FUCK OFF AND DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There, got that out of my system and I feel all calm again

I commuted on the most overcrowded train in the country when I was pregnant (the 8.13 Durham to Newcastle) and not one insert own expletive ever offered me their seat and I was even jostled out of the way by people rushing to catch their connecting train or metro, like I didn't also have a connection to make and job to get to. It wouldn't have been so bad if I wasn't obviously pregnant, but I was HUGE!

foxinsocks · 01/11/2007 10:14

ooh tyaca, what line are you commuting on?

JackBlackRoady · 01/11/2007 11:00

"I hope when his wife gets pregnant she gets varicose veins the size of bridge support cables."

heheheheheh!

Whenever I feel like crap I can rely on mnetters to cheer me up! Thank you!

ClaphamLauren · 01/11/2007 11:25

I commute either Northern Line from Clapham which is hell on earth or a 3 hour round trip from Surrey and I have given up on shame, politeness, british manners etc and I just ask for a seat. Or shout at people to move out of my way.

I am absolutely done with being so polite and reserved that I make myself feel ill before the day has really begun. Tyaca, I'm 22 weeks too and in some outfits you can barely see it but I have a "Baby On Board" badge - I know, they're lame and make a point of taking my coat or jumper off and sticking it out and then fixing them with an evil glare until they get up.

Never been given a seat by a woman and I find that really annoying!

Sarahjct · 01/11/2007 13:15

Hmmm, I gave up on trains and now drive into London from Surrey even though it's a 3.5 hour round trip. I'm 30 weeks and completely knackered but at least I know that I won't be elbowed in the stomach, made to stand all the way and generally ignored. My Baby on Board badge hasn't made any difference as far as getting a seat is concerned (I've found bus passengers total bastards for staring blatantly at you while they sit their young, non-pregant arses on the seats).

The only help it has been is, if I do get a seat, I don't feel obliged to give it up for anyone else, as I usually would do and they can see why.

Even in a car though, I do feel very vulnerable. Sometimes people cut me up and I want to yell at them that I'm 7 months pregnant so be careful FFS!!!

Can you get one of those car badges that says something like 'hormonal pregnant witch on board'? I rather fancy that.

RibenaBerry · 01/11/2007 13:23

That's terrible. I always give up my seat IF I'm sure that the woman is pregnant.

Those badges are a great idea IMO. I am sure that there are literally dozens of women over the years who have got off the train fuming at me for not giving up my seat but where I'm just not sure enough to risk the mortification of offering and being wrong.

The Northern Line is hell though isn't it. Not my line, but it's not called the Misery Line for nothing.

Egg · 01/11/2007 13:27

LOL tyaca at your fab typo in the title calling it "pregnant communters". I love the word munter...

Anyhow, as I think many others have said also, I changed my hours so I was getting on the train at Putney at 7am, when I could actually get a seat, and leaving before the rush hour in the evening. However I had my fair share of b*ards who elbowed me or raced me to seats. Buggers, the lot of them. On the rare occasions someone offered me a seat when I didn't have one, I almost cried I was so hormonal!

VeniVidiVickiQV · 01/11/2007 13:34

LOL at "Communters".

You have to get ruthless and ask. When I used to get on the tube it was awful. Really awful. People would see the bump (and I was HUGE) and lift their book/paper higher as though they couldnt see me. Most often it would be women getting up to give me a seat.

I hated it. Did it through both pg's - and both pg's I had SPD so was on crutches from about halfway through too. So not only was I hugely pg, I was also on crutches.

I didnt think it was possible for a huge clumsy person to be so invisible........

The crutches did come in handy though. I sometimes accidentally squashed some seated folks toes with them, and then apologise profusely. They'll have seen me then

Egg · 01/11/2007 13:37

Good move with the foot crushing. I used to find there were many, many people, and usually women, who would pretend to be asleep as I stood right next to them, with my bump at their eye level. I would stare at them and ever so often their eyes would open to check if my bump was still in their face, and then they would quickly close them again.

Original poster
tyaca · 01/11/2007 14:33

Sarah - "The only help it has been is, if I do get a seat, I don't feel obliged to give it up for anyone else" - lol, that's just like me.

where's the karma? i have been giving up seats all my LIFE!! my mum used to always make us stand as kids so grown ups (not pg ones, or old ones, just grown ups in general) could sit down. (aged nine, i even wrote the london underground asking why they didn't make those dangling things you hold onto lower, as it was always the kids who had to stand and we couldnt reach the higher ones!!)

lauren - much much sympathy for northern line excursions.

foxin - i get bucket trains from streatham hill, or am usually on the victoria line (actually and ace line out of rush hour) and district line a lot

and i now formally change the title of this thread to pregant communters vs the communters!! excellent spot!

OP posts:
MitfordSisters · 01/11/2007 15:31

V v sweet that you wrote to London Underground aged 9.

The most helpful at offering seats I find are women and young men in teens/20s - they always look a bit sheepish as though they are thinking about what you might have done to get in such a pregnant state, or is that just my Mrs Robinson fantasies again