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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

AIBU to think a doctor was unprofessional.

28 replies

Whizzkids0812 · 05/02/2021 18:16

Hi,
I’m currently 38+4 weeks pregnant and had an episode of Reduced movement yesterday so went in to my antenatal day unit for some monitoring. luckily everything did come back okay and my little man is still good.

However I did get rather emotional with the midwife. Over the last three weeks, I have had a couple of reduced movements, 3 types of infection and a 4 day admission to hospital with suspected meningitis. My opinion is that body is just tired, has had enough of being pregnant etc and that Its ready for my baby to come. At my scan yesterday, my baby has an EFW of 8lb 4 already so I asked, (while crying) if there was any way I could have an induction as I was fed up of being worried about being ill and that as my baby was already a very decent size. I didn’t see much of an issue.

The doctor was very reluctant and made me confirm that I was requesting an early induction, she refused to say yes but offered me a sweep which I had. Upon looking in my notes now though, the doctor, in my opinion, has very spottily written. ‘Patient requesting Induction without medical reason as ‘fed up’.

I feel like she took my words out of context and made me sound just like a moaning baby and now that is written on my medical notes for everyone to see.

Sorry for the essay but I had a very bad labour last time, I suffer from anxiety and have been very poorly for the entirety of January. I didn’t think I was asking too much and she’s made me feel awful.

OP posts:
sarahjsdddd · 05/02/2021 18:25

Hello,

From my understanding from the NICE guidelines (not the same as your situation) but if you are requesting an elective c section and consultant refuses, they have to refer you to someone else who can do it. I wonder if could be the same as that? Hopefully someone will be along with better advice Thanks

bitliketonyhares · 05/02/2021 18:27

The issue is, at 38 weeks he just may not be ready. There are always risks with inductions, and if requested they push hard for 39 weeks minimum. It's a lot to ask from their point of view, when labour wards don't have enough beds. She has to be factual on your notes, and the reason you're asking is for your benefit - so she isn't wrong. Don't take it personally, they have jobs to do at the end of the day. You baby will be here soon! Hang in there x

HorseradishSnowflake · 05/02/2021 18:27

I think she was extremely insensitive. Hope you go into labour soon and meet your baby. I'm not medically qualified but it's perfectly reasonable of you to ask about induction option and she could have worded the notes very differently! I know everyone is stressed, especially medical professionals but still.... Don't give it any more energy, and don't let it put you off seeking help when you need it.

TheFoz · 05/02/2021 18:29

If anyone looked back on your notes they would understand why you are ‘fed up’. And you have every reason to be by the sounds of it. I think what at the doctor wrote was a bit undiplomatic but I think it’s important to remember too that they are rushed off their feet and she probably went with something quick and handy. Don’t be embarrassed or ashamed about being fed up and ready for the end.

On the induction side of it, it is not something I would be going for if not deemed medically necessary. It is by no means a walk in the park. At least for the majority, some do have positive induction experiences.

How about a big bar of chocolate or ice cream to cheer yourself up? Tomorrow you will be a day closer to meeting your little one.

TeaPiglet · 05/02/2021 18:30

If you want more support the ladies on the thread 'Due February 2021- The one where there are babies' is full of lovely supportive women going through similar of been through before

lljkk · 05/02/2021 18:37

Did you use the words "fed up"?
Fair game to write down what you felt on the day, if those were your words.

mouldyhouse101 · 05/02/2021 18:44

@sarahjsdddd

Hello,

From my understanding from the NICE guidelines (not the same as your situation) but if you are requesting an elective c section and consultant refuses, they have to refer you to someone else who can do it. I wonder if could be the same as that? Hopefully someone will be along with better advice Thanks

Not sure which thread you're reading. OP requested an induction, not a c section.

OP, you requested an induction because you're fed up. So that's what the doctor wrote. Would you rather he lied?

Leodot · 05/02/2021 18:45

Oh OP ❤️. I don’t really have any advice to offer I just wanted to send you some hugs and good wishes!

Personally, I think that is incredibly unprofessional of the doctor to have written that. It’s perfectly obvious why you would be fed up and they could easily have made reference to the reduced movements, meningitis and infections as reasons you were requesting an induction. I understand there are risks and I know that medical staff are stretched to the limit but she could have been a hell of a lot kinder and more understanding.

I’ve had some good but also some less than brilliant ante natal care this pregnancy too, (including a midwife and doctor disagreeing and one calling the other a stupid idiot!) so I know how worrying and horrible things can be right now ❤️. I hope you are ok and have a safe and happy birth.

sarahjsdddd · 05/02/2021 18:49

I know sorry, I meant to say there may be similar guidelines relating to inductions I'm not sure

bloodywhitecat · 05/02/2021 18:50

I hear you when you say you are finding things hard now but if she has written what you said then she has done nothing wrong.

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 05/02/2021 18:58

@mouldyhouse101 she clearly stated "not the same as your situation". She was comparing a similar situation and wondering if there were guidelines around early induction, just as there are guidelines around elective c-sections.

tinytoucan · 05/02/2021 19:01

If they are the words you actually used then that will be why it is written that way. Health professionals will write what you say in quotation marks rather than their interpretation of what you said. Unfortunately when you read it back it doesn’t sound very caring, but that may not be what was intended.

I hope little one arrives soon, the last stages of pregnancy are hard going even without the extra worries you’ve had x

mouldyhouse101 · 05/02/2021 19:02

[quote AwaAnBileYerHeid]@mouldyhouse101 she clearly stated "not the same as your situation". She was comparing a similar situation and wondering if there were guidelines around early induction, just as there are guidelines around elective c-sections.[/quote]
Where shall I send your trophy?

YouBeYou · 05/02/2021 19:09

Yes, you're being a little unreasonable. Of course you are fed up and anxious but the doctor has done nothing wrong. They haven't time to write an essay about the ins and outs of the reasons you are requested something that isn't medically advised. Likewise no one reading your notes in future is going to give a flying...

Your hormones are controlling this so I'm a little hesitant to say it but, you're being precious.

Swingometer · 05/02/2021 19:14

'Fed up' is a pretty accurate way of summing up how you are feeling in 5 letters without writing an essay. I wouldn't view it as a judgement just as the Doctor finding a succinct way to summarise the situation

Kitkat151 · 05/02/2021 19:17

Medical records are factual....you told the doctor you wanted an induction because you were fed up,....that’s what she wrote.... what else would she write?

grey12 · 05/02/2021 19:17

I had 2 inductions and a "half" induction and let me tell you. It can be terrible....... and it leads to problems much more often than normal births do

Make sure you rest. That's the best thing you can do.

Kitkat151 · 05/02/2021 19:20

@Leodot

Oh OP ❤️. I don’t really have any advice to offer I just wanted to send you some hugs and good wishes!

Personally, I think that is incredibly unprofessional of the doctor to have written that. It’s perfectly obvious why you would be fed up and they could easily have made reference to the reduced movements, meningitis and infections as reasons you were requesting an induction. I understand there are risks and I know that medical staff are stretched to the limit but she could have been a hell of a lot kinder and more understanding.

I’ve had some good but also some less than brilliant ante natal care this pregnancy too, (including a midwife and doctor disagreeing and one calling the other a stupid idiot!) so I know how worrying and horrible things can be right now ❤️. I hope you are ok and have a safe and happy birth.

Why is it unprofessional? It’s factual documentation .....there is nothing judgemental about it..... there isnt time to be writing an essay about everything else..... and it would just be waffle....that’s not the purpose of medical records
BlueTimes · 05/02/2021 19:24

I think many doctors lack a decent bedside manner but I also think you are within your rights to have an induction. If I’ve read your OP correctly this is your third instance of reduced movements which means from 37 weeks or the third occasion, whichever happens last, you should be induced (or c section etc) as per NICE guidelines.

Foobydoo · 05/02/2021 19:31

The doctor should have explained things to you instead of being insensitive.
I had a similar situation but I was 40+2 I begged the doctor to induce me. He patiently explained that is was much better to wait unless there is a medical reason as one intervention can lead to more. He didn't write anything on my notes.
He was right as I did end up being induced at 40+10 and the induction failed and led to csection.

JohnMiddleNameRedactedSwanson · 05/02/2021 19:34

Sorry you are having a tough time but I don’t see that the doctor has done anything wrong. You are understandably very sensitive.

Jent13c · 05/02/2021 19:46

I delivered my second child in UAE so things are different but like you had to go in for reduced movement. They also did CTGs at every antenatal appointment and my ObGyn was never happy with them, there were variances on movement and she suspected that he had the cord wrapped. She sent me up to the hospital about every 2 days from 37 weeks to get checked and then I was there in between with the reduced movement. The doc there actually did a successful sweep at 39 ish weeks and had booked me in for induction the next day. He did have the cord wrapped around him about 8 times! But totally healthy and normal delivery. My friend is a Gyne doctor in Scotland and was texting me about it and said that in her hospital if you are in for reduced movements 3 times they induce you.

Honestly, it may be against the grain (having had one induction and one spontaneous baby after sweep) but I would not care what the doctor had written and push for the induction. I cannot describe how anxious I was in those 3 weeks before delivery thinking that something was wrong and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Can you discuss with your midwife and get a professional opinion from someone who knows your medical history but independent from the decision made by your doctor?

bananamonkey · 05/02/2021 19:50

Sorry you’re having such a rough time, I’m surprised they didn’t offer you an induction after 39 weeks as that’s what happened to me after I’d been in 3 times for reduced movements, at my hospital that triggers the induction discussion, my 3rd episode was at 38 + something so they booked me in the following week. Although it may be different circumstances and it was a second pregnancy and a straightforward one.

Try not to get too hung up on your notes, I think most of us feel fed up at that point anyway!

Good luck Flowers

SunnySideUp2020 · 05/02/2021 19:50

Also think the doctor was not unprofessional.
Reluctant to induce because medically he cannot justify it... reduced movements that turned out to be ok and you don't have meningitis. Induction is a medical procedure that carries lots of risks.
Fed up is pretty accurate and i would be too in your place. Don't be ashamed of this. You have every right to be fed up.
It's not a punishment that it's written in your notes. It reflects the situation in a few words.

Hope you meet your baby soon!

Leodot · 05/02/2021 20:58

@Kitkat151 I didn’t suggest writing an essay. I said that I thought that the doctor should have included what else has happened in the OP’s pregnancy recently to give the comment context as to why she had asked for it. That would be a couple of sentences at most. Hardly an essay or waffle.

I stand by what I said. Just writing “fed up”, whilst it might be true, comes across as unprofessional and demeaning as it gives no context as to the wider situation.

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