Rant

[ChunkyButFunky87]

No real point to this post just feel like I want to get off my chest.

I'm 33, one of my sisters is 40, she has her children 21 & 18 years ago, I have a 4 year old and am now pregnant with second.

She loves my child, no issue there but when I was pregnant with them I used to find it annoy that i always got "yeah well I've been there done it", it's like she begrudges me saying how I feel and it's the same this time. I just happened to comment on how sick I felt the other day and rather than any form of "don't worry/it'll get better" it was again "I was sick every day" or "just you wait till there older and have to deal with what I put up with, you've got it easy" it's like a 20 year delayed competition.

I used a prep machine for my first child and will for my second, literally turned her nose up "eugh just a waste of money, use a kettle, I had to"

That's nice sister dear but I'll use what I see fit. It just feels a little bit like if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all.

Maybe being over sensitive but I don't like to bring up pregnancy with her now (not that I did loads before)

Yesterday we found out the sex, on a group chat with my 3 siblings I put "place your bets" just in a jokey way, other 2 siblings straight away put their predictions, sister "a baby". Seriously, what have I don't to make you be a bit of a dick

Anyone else have this with siblings?

Sorry rant over

I don’t have siblings close by... so I can’t really communicate on a level of this.. but I am getting this kind of thing from my mother, my aunt, my cousins... every woman in my own family and my partners... even his own sister who has no children of her own.. are all commenting along these lines

I feel your pain to a certain extent, I can only say just bite your tongue and walk out of the situation and scream later XD
It’s all I’ve been able to do or it causes a row..

I sympathise so much for you! Hold in there xxx

If I were you I just wouldn’t bother talking to her about the pregnancy. No idea why she’s being like that but obviously isn’t interested . Save yourself the heart ache and getting wound up over it . My sister is similar . Whatever I say she’s quite dismissive or doesn’t reply to half of the messages I send her regarding pregnancy .... she wasn’t even bothered when I found out the gender either ...... all a bit surprising as she’s training to be a midwife! I’ve just learnt not to bother .... sad really but it’s just how some people are ..... xxx

P.s.... it’s also jealousy as to why she’s being like it .... in my opinion x

I don't have this specific issue with siblings as they don't have children but I can understand the lack of support and empathy - especially when I've been there for issues they've had.

I've just learnt to not talk about certain things. It's a shame but you'll feel better.

Maybe she misses being pregnant. It's such a lovely period (well without all the nausea pelvic pain etc...) looking forward to a new baby etc. Who knows maybe she'd love another and you being pregnant just reminds her of it. Not your fault of course she should be able to manage her emotions. Don't take it to heart.

@ChunkyButFunky87 omg you are reading of the same script as me! My older sister had kids before me and it's exactly the same.

I'm pregnant with my first (twins) and everything I say if anyone on our group chat asks seems to be a competition between me and her, it's doing my head in and to the point I don't mention anything to her now about the babies, my pregnancy or what we are doing as I cannot deal with her attitude anymore.

It's all the same 'i did this so should you', 'you need to use such and such as I didn't get too and it's ruined my life (and visa versa).

It's frustrating as being in lockdown again, not being able to see family and talk to them in person since early March last year I feel a bit isolated and like I'm doing this on my own with DH but I simply cannot put up with her constantly putting me down.

If I feel nauseous she had it a million times worse, it's all a competition 🙄.

How annoying! Sorry to hear she’s not being supportive.

Not with a sibling but I’ve told one friend who had a baby late last year- I can’t say anything without her telling me how much worse she had it. (Forgetting that I shared an office with her for the full 8.5months, she’s telling me she was throwing up all day in the first 3 months and couldn’t get out of bed) am not saying she didn’t have it bad but she’ll ask how I am, she’ll say oh yeah I had that but worse you’ll just have to get over it cos I had to. Anyway mistake telling her!

Just feel like saying it’s not a competition!

I think I’ve just learned that no one is interested in your pregnancy as much as you are and a lot of people don’t even pretend to care!

My SIL has a baby before first lockdown last year and doesn’t know I’m pregnant and I’m amused at the comments she and my MIL make in front of me... assuming all goes ok with me they’re gonna be shocked when we tell them our news!

Really hope your sister changes her tune! X

I regretted telling my sister I was pregnant after my 12wk scan as she just started hysterically laughing and mocking me (bare in mind I had a really bad miscarriage).

I honestly wanted to tell her there and then that I regret telling her and to forget I said anything but I'm too nice of a person.

Thanks for all your messages ladies, I don't know, why are some people so fickle?!

Just going to keep quiet on the baby front unless she mentions, think that's best x

Can’t figure out if the ‘been there, done that’ brigade are worse than the unsolicited advice brigade but they definitely all need to pack it in op so I’m with you completely!