Long story but needed to say it somewhere. If your going to judge please don't comment...
Having a baby is all I have ever wanted for a very very long time. Me and my ex partner of 5 years were trying but our relationship broke down. Fast forward 6 months I met someone else, fell pregnant within the first month of being with him... so when I first found out I was over the moon excited, couldn't believe my luck!!
Me and my current partner (babies daddy) haven't always agreed on what to do with the baby, I wanted to keep it and he didn't, for many valid reasons, we booked into the abortion clinic at the hospital, I went for my first appointment and he wasn't allowed in with me due to the COVID situation, I spoke to a doctor and got an appointment for the following week to terminate the baby. Partner was waiting in the car and when I came back from my appointment he was in hysterics on the phone to his step mum saying he didn't want me to get rid of the baby. So we got home, sat and spoke it through and decided to keep the baby.
I am now 36 weeks and I honestly couldn't feel more distant with the baby than I do. I'm not excited, never want to talk about him, dragged the arse out of picking the pram/furniture for his bedroom/clothes. I haven't even started my hospital bag yet because the more I think if I don't pack it he won't come...
Has anyone else felt like this before and will these feelings go away when I finally meet him?