Pregnancy after MC, do you ever relax?

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After more than 2 years and a miscarriage, I am now 14 weeks pg. I am so so happy but you wouldn’t guess that from talking to me. I’m so worried something will go wrong, I analyse every little twinge/feeling, I even told the person doing the scan that I would look at the screen until she confirmed there was actually a baby in there! My 4yr old knows and she’s so excited, she’s thinking up names and telling me how she will help out and I just quietly feel terrible thinking what if something goes wrong 😟 there have also unfortunately been a lot of celebrity mc reported in 2020 which were in there mid term of pregnancy which is also playing on my mind. I just wish I could chill out a bit and get out of my own mind but I don’t think I will until the baby is actually here

I had an ectopic and an now 10 weeks. I have had an early placement scan. I don’t think I will relax until I’m holding the baby!

You do start to relax. For me it was around the 28 week mark. I think it’s because then I knew if there was anything wrong I could have a section and the baby would be fine.

Wishing you all the best in your pregnancy. I definitely found I relaxed more after 28 weeks. Also, in the end, I decided to accept that I was only ever going to enjoy my pregnancies in retrospect.

I also learnt whenever I spoke to midwives etc that instead of saying I was worried (...I doubt the usual response telling someone not to worry has ever actually worked for anyone!) I used to say that I was looking for reassurance... which used to get a completely different response with lots more helpful support as they always said that they could do reassurance.
I also booked a couple of private scans.

I think I might relax when she’s 30 years old. Maybe.

I’m 23 weeks tomorrow and whilst I’m a lot better than I was pre 20 week scan, I’m still nervous about it all. I couldn’t feel her move last night, & I know it’s too early for patterns to have emerged yet, but didn’t stop me thinking something was wrong. I’ve felt one pop this morning, which has helped, but bleh.

I've had 2 losses after 3yrs TTC and now 27 weeks. I am better but still wouldn't call myself relaxed! Getting some extra MW appts to hear HB around 16-20 weeks helped. Also as others have said feeling a bit more confident now that I know I'm nearly at a point where baby could survive outside. Still haven't bought a single thing as think that's tempting fate...

I had two losses and now am 11 weeks and have had two normal private scans. I don’t think I’ll really relax until after viability due to hearing stories about miscarriages at 20 weeks+. Even then I know someone who had a stillbirth at 8 months after a normal pregnancy. So not expecting to be able to truly relax ever. I think having had a missed miscarriage makes it even harder as you know that miscarriage doesn’t always come with bleeding or pain so you’re happily thinking everything is ok then a scan shows it hasn’t been ok for weeks.

Hi ladies,

I’ve never had a MC but this is my first pregnancy and my anxiety is through the roof. I had a massive bleed at 13 weeks (baby was fine) and bled for 4 weeks after that. I can’t relax at all, constantly feel like something bad is going to happen. I hope this goes away. 19 weeks today xx

Not until your babe is in your arms... then you'll do a whole lot of worrying about other things! Big congrats xx