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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

After two surprises, should I find out what my third DC is?!

12 replies

Teakind · 18/12/2020 13:00

As the title says really. I'm pregnant with my third and am really tempted to find out what I'm having this time. My first two were surprises and it was lovely so I'm not sure if I would regret finding out.

One of my reasons for wanting to know is my DD keeps saying it's a baby sister so I don't want her getting too attached to the idea of a sister if it's a boy. She's only 3 so I may well be overthinking it.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Did anyone regret finding out early? If you've had surprises and also births where you knew, were they any different?

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Original poster

Teakind · 19/12/2020 10:19

Hopeful bump : )

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Moandy · 19/12/2020 10:34

I didn't find out with my DS. We decided to with this one, so I'd know if I needed new clothes etc. We found out we are having a girl. I'm absolutely thrilled, but at the same time part of me keeps imagining that feeling when they lift them up and you find out at birth. I wouldn't say I regret it as such, but it is more exciting to wait. That said I'm relieved I can slowly buy 'girly' things and not have that mad rush to buy when they're born.

Cowmilk · 19/12/2020 10:46

I found out with all of mine. With my last ds I didn’t want to know but dh wanted to know and I didn’t feel comfortable having dh know and not me knowing so I asked. I thought it was sweet finding out and I loved looking at dh face for his reaction. Well dh didn’t attend ds2 20 weeks scan but my grandma was with me and she was amazed. I feel lucky to have shared that with her.

Either way I loved referring my babies to their names, while still in me. After birth I used to get excited to see if the babies suited their names. I was always open to change the babies name. Ds3 name did actually change after birth.

I never had any surprises.

Everybodysaycheese · 19/12/2020 12:39

I didn't find out with either of mine and if we go on to have a third (unlikely) then I'd still want to wait until birth to find out! My daughter was 2 1/2 and referring to a sister. She didn't mention a sister again when ds was born- she was just thrilled with a new baby!

JChina · 19/12/2020 13:10

I didn't find out with my first and did with my second. I must admit finding out after having not done first time felt a bit like opening christmas presents early, although we did enjoy being able to tell my eldest that he was going to have a baby brother. I'm pregnant again with my 3rd and really not sure what to do this time, I think I'm going to wait and see how I feel at the 20w scan.

SacreBleeeurgh · 19/12/2020 13:14

I found out for exactly the reason you’ve stated - elder DD was utterly fixated on having a baby sister and I wanted time to prep her if it turned out we were having a boy. As it was, I infinitely preferred knowing, having done the ‘surprise’ thing first time around, and if I were to have another child (which I won’t), I would find out again. So I don’t think there’s anything wrong with finding out at all, we’re all different, do what you think will work for your family best.

TwinkleStars15 · 19/12/2020 13:26

I found out with number 1 and kept number 2 as a surprise. Both were lovely. If I had another (I’m not going to!) I would find out. I felt that I bonded more with my daughter as I knew from 16 weeks, named her, had her nursery done, bought clothes etc. With my second pregnancy I didn’t buy anything because I had all her clothes if it was a girl and would buy new if it was a boy. I found the wait exciting but challenging too.

premmie09 · 19/12/2020 13:30

I had two surprises then found out with #3 at about 20 weeks. I was pleased to know, although I could never 100% trust an ultrasound, considering how often they get it wrong.

It was nice to be able to picture the little person a bit more. I just held back from getting completely attached to that sex just in case.

grey12 · 19/12/2020 13:35

I think you need to think back to why you wanted your first children to be a surprise. My 3 DDs I waanted to know. Mainly we're terrible with choosing names It takes us forever!!!

MsMiaWallace · 19/12/2020 13:39

Didn't find out with any of my 3.
I've got 3 DS's.
When DS 3 was born this year DH phoned grandparents who were babysitting my other 2 boys to update them.
My other boys apparently squealed with delight & jumped up & down when they knew they had another brother!

Not sure what COVID restrictions are like where you are but with no partners allowed at scans it'd be far better to leave the sex a surprise until birth.

Otocinclus · 19/12/2020 13:55

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for privacy reasons.

shelbyrae · 19/12/2020 15:56

Personally I've opted to know - it helps with decorating, buying clothes, thinking of a name, and making it real. It's just a big change having a baby that I wanted to take away some of the unknown!

Plus with my first I had always imagined having a girl so I wanted to prepare if that wasn't the case.

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