Apologies for the long post. I am 42 years old with 3 DC (3-9) and have just discovered I am pregnant despite being on BC. I am just getting back on top of full-time work and trying to finish the next level of certification that will allow me to continue in my job and DH is freelance, with work being precarious right now. I am just really torn as while we hadn't yet locked the door as it were(vasectomy apt on cards), we had just about closed it on having more DC. I feel like an idiot and am just worried about negatively impacting the DC we do have(through my health, money, etc.). It often feels like we are just hanging on as we have no family around and, while we have some financial stability, a 4th would be a stretch especially if we want to provide DC with good education (secondary school options crap) or support them with Uni later on. However, under different circumstances (more financial security, support, me being younger), this wouldn't be such an unwelcome surprise. I do also wonder about my ability to go through with medical termination as, having started the phone calls, I am so upset but I am sure the majority of women are. DH says he is supportive no matter what although I think he would be delighted with another(he is generally overoptimistic!). Just feeling heartbroken at the situation and needed somewhere to put this. Any perspective from those who have managed to juggle a 4th and work etc. and those who decided to keep their family at 5 would be greatly appreciated.