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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Hospital birth VS Home birth

42 replies

doingitforthefrill · 26/11/2020 12:01

Still early days for me to be thinking about this but with recently seeing the midwife she asked if I had considered a home birth.

This will be my 3rd, previous 2 were born in hospital. One of which was a water birth and the most amazing experience.

Both my labours have came on VERY quickly and both came before their due date. I only literally got to the hospital in time with both of them. Bearing in mind I only lived 10 mins drive at the time, currently now living more like 30 mins drive if traffics good.

I had thought before that if I had a 3rd then I would quite like to give birth at home, but then I’m unsure if it would make me nervous of the thought of no immediate back up if something went wrong. All pregnancies have been low risk just to clarify.

So I’m looking for views, have you had a home birth before and what was your experience?

OP posts:

twinkletoesimnot · 26/11/2020 12:05

I have had 5 home births (6 dc - first in hospital)

I highly recommend it. Nothing like snuggling in your own bed with a cuppa in your own mug after!

Original poster

doingitforthefrill · 26/11/2020 12:11

@twinkletoesimnot Wow that’s amazing! Where in your house did you actually give birth?

I just have this lovely vision of giving birth and snuggling this little newborn in the comfort of my own home, instead of waiting hours on end for paper work to be completed at hospital so we can leave!

OP posts:

DinosaurGrrrrr · 26/11/2020 12:14

I’ve not had one but I’m on my 3rd baby, the midwife seems keen to encourage me to have one but to be honest I feel safer in hospital. Each time I went to give birth I arrived at the hospital I had a feeling of “I’m safe now I’m here”. I guess if you don’t like the hospital environment and it has the opposite effect on you then I can see why you’d maybe opt for a home birth. The other thing that stuck in my mind was one of my best friend’s sil is a GP, she’s very against home births and had all 3 in hospital, her reasoning being she gets to see what happens when home births go badly wrong, she would far rather be somewhere where there’s help on hand if it goes horribly wrong. I think I’m more in this camp than trying to create some serene experience in my living room. Everyone is different though I guess.

I’m quite happy to give birth in hospital and leave a few hours later, this happened with our second child, I gave birth at 8am and was back home early afternoon, no issues (and also no mess in my house!).

NameChange30 · 26/11/2020 12:24

My second was a home birth and it was amazing! Definitely recommend it, especially if you have fast labours. I can't think of anything worse than rushing to hospital while trying to hold baby in! With a fast home birth the midwife does all the rushing

passthemustard · 26/11/2020 13:55

I've had 3 home births and they were amazing. As PP said being in your own bed and having your own things is the best thing after birth.

My first home birth, after delivery, the midwife did her notes then made us tea and bacon sandwiches and then put the Hoover round before she left! Best midwife ever!

Showering in your own shower is amazing after too. My last home birth I delivered, gave the baby to my husband and eldest DD to cuddle, had a shower, changed into clean pyjamas and was back on the sofa feeding my baby when the midwife suggested I might like a shower, I was like it's all done pet and the kettles on, she said she was clearly no longer needed and left 😂

I'm due my 5th DC in a few weeks and I'm booked for a hospital delivery which I'm panicking about. I don't want to be confined to one room but we have got a bit of a houseful at the moment 4 kids, 2 dogs and my parents so we think it'll be easier to pop down the road this time. I am worried about not getting there in time though.....

borageforager · 26/11/2020 14:04

DinosaurGrrrrr my husband is a doctor and we’ve had two homebirths. He sees what goes on in hospital & would rather we avoid it if possible

OP, having peanut butter toast & a cup of tea on my sofa after birth of DC2 was an absolute highlight of my life compared with DC1’s hospital birth. Loved both my homebirths.

Original poster

doingitforthefrill · 26/11/2020 15:19

I’m definitely thinking a home birth could be something I’d like to experience!

@passthemustard your midwife sounds fab!

Where did you all actually give birth? And what could I do for preparation nearer the time?

OP posts:

NameChange30 · 26/11/2020 15:30

I'd hired a birthing pool and planned to get DH and doula to set it up for me in the living room and give birth there. But that didn't happen! My labour was very fast, I went to the bathroom when it started and never made it out of the bathroom! It didn't help that I didn't realise quite how fast it was all progressing until I felt the urge to push.

It doesn't require much prep:

hire a birthing pool if you want one, also get things like birthing ball, TENS machine if you want them
make sure you have plenty of towels and your DH/DP knows where they are to grab them when needed
I followed advice I'd read about buying a shower curtain to protect sofa/bed but didn't need it in the end, the midwives brought those big absorbent pads things and put them on the bed.
I packed a hospital bag in case of needing to be transferred, didn't need it in the end but was handy for peace of mind.

The most important prep we did was to make a plan for DC1. Some people like to have their older children around when they give birth at home, but I didn't want DS here because he's 3 and would have stressed me out, plus I didn't want him to be upset about seeing me in pain etc. So we had lined up some nearby friends to take him, the first thing I asked DH to do was to get DS ready and drop him off at our friends' house. We had a plan B as well which was my mum but she lives further away.

weepingwillow22 · 26/11/2020 15:32

I have had 2 home births. Both were great experiences. I was especially glad I booked a home birth for my second as he arrived in 10 minutes and I think a hospital birth would have actually have been a car birth!

I had both in a hired birth pool in my dining room and snuggled up in bed after.

NameChange30 · 26/11/2020 15:34

Must have been more than 10 minutes if you had time to set up the pool and get in?

YouCantBeSadHoldingACupcake · 26/11/2020 15:37

I had a home birth in January (dc8 but 1st home birth) it was my easiest birth ever (no 7 was the worst in case you think it's just because it's number 8). I was so much more relaxed at home and found it much easier to deal with the pain

InTheLongGrass · 26/11/2020 15:37

If you have had 2 short labours, and only just got to the hospital, I would strongly suggest you have a pile of stuff at home incase baby arrives unexpectedly.
Trying to tell DH where things were as he was on the phone to ambulance control, and I'm just being told "dont push, someone is coming" wasnt the most relaxing environment.
But being in the car would have been worse!

weepingwillow22 · 26/11/2020 15:42

@NameChange30 Sorry I was not very clear. I meant I would only have had 10 minutes to get to hospital from the time contractions were close enough together.

My waters boke at 4am. I then went shopping and out for lunch. I came home and set up the birth pool. Contractions started at 5pm, my husband filled the pool and called the midwives. First stage was 35 min. I got in the pool for second stage which was just 3 min.

DappledThings · 26/11/2020 17:45

I was recommended to have a homebirth with a second because first labour was fast. I said there was no chance I'd even consider it.

I like hospitals, I like knowing all the kit and people are there if anything goes wrong.

People always say about how great it is to be able to shower in your own bathroom afterwards. Personally with the amount of blood involved I was much happier having a shower in a nice big wet room that someone else was responsible for cleaning. I didn't want any of the mess involved with giving birth anywhere near my own home!

NameChange30 · 26/11/2020 18:01

Funny, it's always the women who haven't had a home birth who always make negative comments on these threads of course you'd be negative about it, you chose not to have one!

Most of the women who have actually had home births are positive about them. Says it all.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 26/11/2020 18:10

My second was Home birth. After my first where I gave birth alone, in a hospital room, with the nearest other person being DH who was in the corridor shouting for help. (Not NHS bashing btw.. was in a private hospital abroad), there were worries I would give birth unexpectedly again. Didn't fancy giving birth at the side of a country lane in the Yorkshire countryside in winter (and snow as it happens!). Instead the midwives came to me, all went well, and she was delivered safely rather than uncontrolled like DD1.

I felt safer at home. It's a personal thing. I know a lot of people feel safer in hospitals.

DappledThings · 26/11/2020 18:12

@NameChange30

Funny, it's always the women who haven't had a home birth who always make negative comments on these threads

of course you'd be negative about it, you chose not to have one!

Most of the women who have actually had home births are positive about them. Says it all.

Why so offended? It's a thread asking for opinions on home births. I've given my experience and why I wouldn't want one if you paid me. I'm sure lots of people have a lovely experience but it's not for everyone.

123rd · 26/11/2020 18:19

I had a very quick home birth. It was planned for home & was my second pregnancy. Whilst still on the delivery bed of my first pregnancy the midwife at hospital suggested a home birth for any more babies. I was quick with the first too
My first dc was fast asleep upstairs whilst I laboured and birthed.
I wandered around downstairs and planned to give birth in the lounge. Was recommended to buy some bubble wrap to go over the carpet. Which was great, a little annoying with the sounds but did make us laugh
All very stress less. The midwife literally was with us for 30 mins before and I think she held baby whilst I had a Bath afterwards...Can't actually remember now!

ShinyGreenElephant · 26/11/2020 18:22

I'm hoping for a home birth for my third. I want my other kids there and I want to get straight into my own bed after with all my babies and a glass of champagne. Ill be really sad if I can't have it as this is our last baby

malaguena · 26/11/2020 18:29

I had an unplanned home birth (baby arrived fast and I was in too much pain to consider standing up and getting in the car to go to hospital). It was great, no issues, weirdly not much mess although I had nothing planned. The nurses who turned up put some plastic sheets down and everything was cleaned in minutes. I had a nice shower and the midwife came a few hours later to make sure everything was fine. It is a really good memory. For my last baby I was really set on another home birth, bought loads of towels and plastic sheets (from a paint shop), as well as a birthing ball. In the end baby arrived very very late, I had to be induced and stayed at hospital, but I was able to use a birthing ball throughout and gave birth on a mat on the floor. I would have loved a home birth but with supportive midwives who let me do my own thing, it was quite similar. If you usually labour fast, you might find it much more relaxing to get whatever you need and stay home.

Babdoc · 26/11/2020 18:48

Home birth is lovely until something goes unexpectedly wrong. Severe fetal distress, major haemorrhage, placental abruption, retained placenta, amniotic fluid embolism, undiagnosed malpresentation, shoulder dystocia...
In hospital you have a fully equipped and staffed operating theatre, a shock pack of 6 units of o neg blood and a paediatric crash team all on stand by.
What do you have at home? A midwife who can’t even do an urgent forceps lift out, let alone an emergency Caesarian section.
I’m glad I didn’t risk it for my second baby, who was very nearly a stillbirth despite a textbook normal term pregnancy and labour. She survived thanks to the crash team, intracardiac adrenaline, iv anticonvulsants, intubation, a brain scan and a week in ITU.

NameChange30 · 26/11/2020 18:51

I was wondering when Babdoc would turn up!

OP, do your own research about the risks and how issues would be dealt with. Everyone has to weigh up what level of risk they are comfortable with.

Home birth is not risk free but an informed decision is not an irresponsible one.

PFin · 26/11/2020 18:58

The thought of being able to.curl up in your own bed after birth sounds like bliss i have to say

Mummyme87 · 26/11/2020 19:08

Midwife here. I’ve had two babies in hospital, both fairly tits up but loads of intervention so expected.

Homebirth is the safest option if you’re low risk. Majority of complications occur in birth when intervention has happened.

Many many obstetric medical staff have homebirths

Joeyandpacey · 26/11/2020 19:15

I had a wonderful home birth and hoping for a second.

The stats show for subsequent births it is just as safe as hospital. You are also more likely to have interventions in a hospital setting.

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