Mums to all boys

[louisesand]

Hi

I just wanted to ask mums with all boys - if you would have liked a daughter did you ever manage to reconcile yourself with the fact that you wouldn't have one? I suppose I always just assumed I would have the stereotypical mix of boys and girls in my family but it was not to be for me. I love my boys to bits and wouldn't change them for the world but I do sometimes feel sad that I won't have a daughter.

It's pretty irrational because I really couldn't give any specifics on why I would like a little girl. The only thing I can put my finger on is I've always been close to my mum and I worry I won't be as close to my boys when they are grown up.

I know how lucky I am and feel so ingrateful for feeling like this but I worry that I'll never feel like my family is complete.

I don't think that you are ungrateful, I just think that we all have certain expectations in life and when they are not fulfilled we become sad. Remeber when you were a little girl, did you ever have a boy baby doll? I did'nt. When I was having my DS I was so sure he was a girl that I bought a flowery snow suit and he went home from the hospital in it. I have never lived it down. This is my fifth pregnancy and I only have one child I have lost a fallopian tube to a ectopic and its took me 6 years to get pregnant and for it to stay. Yes I would sort of like a girl, but I have to say that if its a boy so be it. It seems hard when we have so much control over the outcome of things in our lives but over this we have none. I think your just a normal human being who like all of us has the secret desire in our hearts for some things, but we know that we are blessed to have even what we have. You will get over it and move on....or you may have a girl who knows.

I've got 2 boys and love them to bits but I did feel like you. Hence I am pregnant! We did try to sway for a girl but who knows, and we'll love the baby boy or girl obviously. We did say though that if I hadn't conceived this time we would consider adopting a girl(or2) , would that be an option for you in the future?

Deb

I posted exactly the same thoughts a while ago - I'm pregnant with number 4, a boy and although I have a girl (no 1) I was really hoping for another one - three boys is overwhelming. I think it's totally natural, especially to want another female in the house - boys are gorgeous but different. It's only important as an abstract if only - once you have the baby the whole gender thing doesn't matter.

We have two wonderful boys and TTC our third at the mo.
I must be the only person I know that does not want a girl!
I want a baby, I would not be disapointed with a girl but I would prefer a boy. I know what I am doing with boys. I think they are easier as well as they grow up. Plus we dont have enough bedrooms for girls too.
Friends that know we are TTC are praying / wishing for me to have a girl as I must want one after having two boys, but I dont!

i'm expecting my 2nd boy (today!) and i know this will be def be my last pregnancy. I don't feel cheated- i love the thought of 2 little boys in PJs snuggling upto us! Persoanlly, i wanted children and a family, but i had no picture of what structure it would take.

i was a TINY bit disappointed when SIL found she having boy too though...i liked the idea of a niece. But then i thought, 3 little boys in PJs!

I have 2 boys and have felt exactly like you. We think we would like another baby but I know that I will not even try until I am completely happy about whether it will be a boy or girl.. Part of me now still would secretly love a girl, but I am starting to feel real joy at the thought of having 3 boys!

Pregnantgrrl - good luck! And you will love 2 little boys in PJ's - mine are currently in PJ's and dressing gowns watching Cbeebies and they are so adorable I could eat them !

meemar- i could eat DS in his PJ's, i may explode when there's 2 of them!

I have one boy and would love another, but also really want a little girl. I've been saving stuff for her for years, bits of jewellry, bags etc. so I will be disappointed if I don't have a girl at some point but I don't think my feelings on that would ever stop me loving any boys I have or being immensely grateful for what i do have.