Long story as short as i can make it: I'm 7 weeks pregnant with my first baby and at the weekend had a scare. Started cramping in my lower right abdomen, it hurt a lot when i went to the toilet, sneezed, coughed etc and I had muscle aches down the side of my body including in my shoulder. I called the maternity unit who said to go to A&E to get checked over. This was on Friday night and I wasn't seen until Saturday morning, they did some tests, said it could be ectopic but not so sure, but said they'd make sure I had a ultrasound first thing this week. My husband couldn't be there with me at A&E due to covid rules.
Anyway, I was quiet all weekend, couldn't sleep, had panic attacks, I felt numb, just terrified of what could be happening to the baby and my body but yesterday AM the EPU called me and booked me in for 2pm and said my husband could come along to this. I let him know straight away at 10am and he said "I'll see if I can make it as I've got to finish making some doors" (he has a carpentry business). At the time I said ok don't worry.
Anyway, 50 minutes before the appointment he messaged to say he couldn't make it as he hadn't finished. I said to him that he only working locally, that it was 15 minutes away from his job and the appointment wouldn't be any longer than 20 minutes and he could go back to his job after, then I started to cry and said I really needed him there, so he decided to come.
THANK GOODNESS the scan went well and everything was fine with baby, healthy, heartbeat etc etc and I just have a UTI that I now have anti biotics for, however, my husband has really upset me and I can't get past it. The fact he was willing to just let me go on my own, despite not knowing if things were ok, knowing how I was worrying all weekend, despite being first baby and first scan and only had this appointment because we thought something was wrong. That he couldn't just want to be there for me and the moment I got the appointment didn't even consider saying "I'm coming". I had to tell him.
I know his job is important but so is mine but I have to drop everything too and I just feel so deflated by his actions that I worry about the rest of the pregnancy and his (lack of) support.
Even smaller things, I was a heavy smoker and have quit but I've struggled with it and he's still smoking at home with no care or regard to how it makes me feel, he doesn't even want to try. Just says he'll give up and doesn't. He got drunk the other night and I had to drive him to get cigs as he ran out. He doesn't seem to understand everything is changing for me, he could at least make a bit of effort. I know this sounds so ridiculous but plug in air fresheners are making me feel so sick (seems to be those and beef at the moment) and I told him, so guess what he did on Sunday; went and turned on every single one in the house.
I've tried talking to him, he's just got defensive. His defensiveness has upset me so much I've had to block his number today as the messages he's sending are full of self pity and being arrogant. He will not see how it's made me feel.
Ladies, am I being stupid feeling like this?