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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Struggling with low mood and anxious

2 replies

Corilee2806 · 02/11/2020 15:59

Hi all, I’m 24 weeks pregnant with my second baby and really struggling to cope. I feel really isolated and like I can’t talk to anyone in real life about this, although I may try and contact my midwife mental health team if that’s an option.

I’ve always struggled with mental health in pregnancy - I had two early miscarriages and then when I had my first baby two years ago, was diagnosed in the last few months with growth restriction which resulted in induction at 37 weeks. All turned out fine and I now have a healthy 2 year old but it was very hard at the time - lots of uncertainty from 32 weeks when it was picked up and in hospital almost every day for scans and monitoring. She then lost a lot of weight when she was already tiny, and struggled to regain for the first few months of her life - it was a hard time.

In the early days of this pregnancy I was really anxious about miscarriage but still so happy to be pregnant again and everything seemed to be more straightforward after 12 weeks. I’m having more scans this time which is great and so far things look ok but we won’t really know for sure until 32 weeks when they start growth scans. I also have an anterior placenta so barely feel movement, which I’m really struggling with. I wish I felt more excited but right now I just can’t. The uncertainty around partners not being allowed in hospital isn’t ideal either, I was in for ages last time and keep worrying about what would happen if I ended up in for ages again, but I know I would just deal with it.

I’ve been working from home all year and I’m lucky to have a stable job, but it’s very stressful (a lot of performance issues I’m trying to manage) without much support. I now also have to isolate and I think this weekend’s news has sent me over the edge. I constantly feel tearful and like all I want to do is go to sleep for the next 3 months.

I feel so guilty as I’m hardly doing anything with my toddler, not that we can go out anyway, and I can’t see an end in sight - we’ve had to cancel all the things we had planned for this month which I know isn’t the end of the world but they were things that were keeping me going. The baby is due in February and I really worry I won’t be able to cope with 2, if I’m already struggling this much. I do have a supportive partner so I’m lucky there too but I feel so bad if I leave him to do more of the childcare etc.

Sorry this is so long and grateful for any advice from anyone who has experienced this in the past. I think I’m just completely overwhelmed and feel so alone.

OP posts:
JemNo66 · 02/11/2020 17:01

I don't have any advice as such but just wanted to say you're not alone - I'm 20 weeks with my second and feeling much like you describe, and am experiencing similar things. I have an anterior placenta so have felt much less movement so far than I did at this point with my little boy, and am anxious about our 20 week scan on weds when I'd previously just been feeling excited. We'll also be having growth scans as he was on the small side when born. I have ongoing depression which I'm on medication for and am receiving support from the mental health midwifery team (would defo recommend contacting them), but I think a lot of how I'm feeling is due to the circumstances we find ourselves in. Wfh since March has been so, so isolating and I'm quite jealous of my husband who gets to see other people all day at work and have actual conversations! I wish I could just hibernate until all of this is over. Sending hugs Flowers

Corilee2806 · 02/11/2020 17:50

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply, and sorry to hear you’re having a hard time too - although I do feel slightly better knowing I’m not alone, if that makes sense? I’m not on any medication but was given the option to last year when I was really low while on mat leave with my first. I will definitely see what support there is from the midwives. I agree, I think I would have found it challenging anyway but this whole situation doesn’t help! And I really struggled with the whole idea of whether to try for a baby when we knew this was all going on, but for various reasons we didn’t feel we could wait - mainly because I didn’t want to run the risk of even more complications due to my age. Hugs to you too xx

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