Am I overthinking about family Christmas?

[Nam095]

I’m going on 4 weeks pregnant tomorrow and I haven’t told any of my family members yet. Obviously it’s still extremely early so anything could happen at any time, but I will be bang on 12 weeks in the Christmas week. My family usually all meet up at my Nan and Grandad’s house all day for Christmas lunch, usually around 10 of us. Running up to Christmas, probably start of December, they’ll be asking me if I’m going to go to theirs this year as well. As I’ll be 12 weeks at the time of Christmas Day I don’t really have an excuse before then to refuse, unless I flat out tell them I’m pregnant and I don’t want to risk getting Covid.

Thing is, my family, all in tier 2 lockdown, are all mixing households in indoor settings so they’re not following the rules whatsoever. They genuinely don’t care and it irritates me. My brother is actually one of those conspiracy theorists about Covid so that in itself makes me not want to see him. I don’t know if I’m being too cautious but I really don’t want to see them if they’re going to be continuously mixing households in the run up to Christmas.

Should I just spend Christmas Day just OH and I? My family will be disappointed and annoyed as I spent Christmas Day last year just OH and I as well. Or am I being silly and overreacting??

who knows what things will be like at christmas
just say you dont want to mix due to risk

I told family before 12 weeks but I know that's not for everyone!

If you don't want to tell maybe blame being scared of COVID and even if they are annoyed with you once they know you are pregnant it will make sense and all should be forgiven x

How long have you been in tier 2? I'd personally start now by saying I know you guys aren't following Restrictions but I haven't got 6k each minimum spare for a fine and I want to be safe etc. Then it doesn't look too Obvious just for Xmas. You have 8 weeks to get your back up worked!

I can't see the Covid situation getting any better before Christmas - we've gone into Tier 3 this week and no one is bothered about the rules one bit from what I can see! I'd just say you're following the guidelines and will see what they announce pre Christmas before making any decisions.

I don't think you are overeacting. In your position I wouldn't go because 1) the risk of catching it from them and 2) if I had to listen to any conspiracy crap on top of all the carelessness with precautions I'd end up throwing the pudding at someone.

If you don't want to tell them yet, then use covid as an explanation and if they get annoyed then bugger them frankly. You can always ring them at xmas and give them a nice surprise with the added pregnancy explanation.

One other perspective is that if you did tell them earlier and they were in a position to reduce their social contact before Christmas, and could be trusted to do it...they might do it for you? I wouldn't expect that would work out really from what you say though.

I am very doubtful that 10 will be allowed to meet anyway.

@BabyG123 we’re all based in London so since 17th, I’m the only one in the family following the rules, since proper lockdown in March as well!

@Inkpaperstars the conspiracy theories he comes out with are outrageous (microchips in vaccines etc), and if you try and argue against it he gets angry and says we’re all wrong! Definitely don’t want to deal with that. And 100% they would not reduce their social contact! Tbh they’re all selfish so wouldn’t matter to them if I’m pregnant, if they want to go out and meet people they will.

I have a private scan booked on 22nd Nov when I’m 8 weeks so if everything goes well I think I’ll tell them about a week after that I’m pregnant and that I won’t be visiting anyone that’s been mixing households.

@Nam095 I have the same with mother and now she doesn't see us because of this, even once baby is here you'll want to
Protect it as corona will still be about I'm sure.

Stick with it! Protect you!

My OH was just on the phone with his mum and he mentioned that we’re most likely going to spend Christmas together just us 2 (his parents also don’t follow the rules, that’s another story in itself..) and she bloody asked for an invite for the both of them 🤦🏼‍♀️