Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Tell me about your second labour and delivery...

22 replies

bluemoon2468 · 24/10/2020 18:35

...in comparison to your first!

I only gave birth to my first baby a month ago but it had its complications and I'm already feeling worried about potentially having to do it again some day. It wasn't an all out negative experience, but it was VERY long (2 days of latent labour followed by 28.5 hours of established labour) and after spending most of my labour in the natural birth centre with no pain relief, it ended on the labour ward with a ventouse delivery, episiotomy, 2nd degree tear and small post-partum haemorrhage. His head was on the 98th centile which I'm guessing played a role.

Every professional I've spoken to has said it's likely to be much quicker and easier next time and is unlikely to end with the same interventions, but I can't help but feel worried it'll follow the same pattern. Part of me wants to just book an elective c-section next time, but another part of me hopes I'll be able to have the natural waterbirth I wanted this time round.

I know it's too early to be worrying, but I'd love to hear your 1st versus 2nd labour stories. Are they really a lot quicker and easier?

OP posts:
Queenbee95 · 24/10/2020 18:42

1st - waters broke at 36 weeks, contractions instantly. Established labour for 24 hours. Contractions kept slowing the whole time though. 1 dihydrocodeine in first 14 hours. Had the hormone drip to speed things up, started gas and air. Eventually had pethidine injection then epidural. Ended in me having a bad infection. Kiellands forceps (he was back to back whole time) episiotomy and tears. It was horrific.

2nd - 6 hours established labour. Only had gas and air and water birth in birthing centre. Was so much quicker and I was a lot more relaxed!

Don’t let your first experience scare you from having more kids if you’d like more. I’m now pregnant with number 3, hoping for another water birth 💖

wintersdawn · 24/10/2020 18:55

None of them are the same. Mine were totally different.

First - contractions starting and water breaking to full dilation 3 hours flat then the complications hit and ended in emergency section an hour later.

Second - induced to avoid complications in first by trying to keep baby smaller. Reacted badly to drugs had counter drugs 24 hours later they broke waters and 15 hours later baby arrived in surgery again anyway Hmm

cptartapp · 24/10/2020 19:13

DC1 waters broke on the loo, then a 24 hour back to back labour, with two hours pushing, an epidural and episiotomy.
DC2 born after two paracetamol and a diazepam. Slept through all the contractions and was rushed to delivery suite on a bed to push at 10cm. Waters broke at delivery.
Some midwife both times.

Ding123 · 24/10/2020 19:19

1st - pains started on the Monday, 2x back and forth from the hospital but I wasn't dilated so not ready. Worst pain ever as baby back to back. Finally admitted on Wednesday morning, DC1 born at 9pm that night. Distressed baby, ventouse delivery after an episiotomy. Worst experience ever.

Dc2 2.5 years later - pains started in evening, admitted into hospital at 4am and DC2 born at 11am. Very quick compared to dc1 and not as painful. Slight tear but didn't need stitches. Much better experience. Pain relief I used for both DC was pethidine.

Dc3 is due any day and the nerves have kicked in! But I'm hopeful it can't be any worse than my first labour.

Bumfuzzled · 24/10/2020 19:22

My first was looong and hard to cope with. 26.5 hours of horrendous ness.

The second was quick and easy. I didn’t think I was in established labour until I was 8cm. I called the midwife saying I think it might have started and burst into tears (not usual for me). She was nearby so called in (I’m ruralish) and it was all systems go. I had him easily at home 1.5 hours later - unplanned home birth. It’s like the first paved the way for the 2nd Grin

Orangedaisy · 24/10/2020 19:23

1st 36 hrs. Fine, just went on forever. Pushed for just more than 3 hrs. Managed on gas and air. 2nd 36 minutes. Didn’t make it to hospital, hadn’t even had a paracetamol.

BumbleNova · 24/10/2020 19:27

I'm sat here cuddling my DS2 who was born just under 24 hours ago. Such a difference with my first!

My first was a truly grueling 3 day and 3 night affair. I needed an epidural and they broke my waters. Lots of stitches and quite a big post partum hemorrhage.

Last night my waters went at 530. I immediately started to get contractions. I delivered no 2 with just gas and air, at 730 in a not yet full birth pool at home. It was an incredible experience.

CornishTiger · 24/10/2020 19:33

1st. Long latent, wasn’t taken seriously in labour. Delivered as they were preparing a enema ( he was back to back and they said I might be constipated causing pain) and discussing csection with my partner and mum outside. In labour I had necked a ton of gas and air, pethidine wasn’t helping on second dose ( I was in hindsight too far gone for it to help) but no pain relief for delivery. Had to have stitches and they stitched me badly so tight for sex at opening.

2nd. More empowered. Niggled for weeks. Few hours from first contractions to delivery but pain manageable and no pain relief. Water birth. Quite easy delivery. Felt amazing afterwards. Had a stitch I think.

3rd. Home. Few hours from first contraction to delivery. Ten machine then had a bit of a meltdown as I transitioned. Told the hypno cd to shut the fuck up, ripped off tens got in pool and pushed him out quite soon after. Took the midwife by surprise. No stitches or tearing.

Magpiefeather · 24/10/2020 19:35

I had similar fears to you OP and was offered a C section if I wanted one. I went with my gut which said if I had been more prepared and less fearful labour wouldn’t have been half as terrible. I read the hypnobirthing book by Katherine Graves (which is fantastic for whatever birth you end up having! It just really helped me remain calm).

Second baby I was 2 weeks overdue date and was induced, BUT only needed the pessary. Was completely calm and in control. Had gas and air from 7cm, they even let me birth in the birth centre so I had my lovely water birth that I wanted. 100 times more calm, not stressful at all, baby born calm, bounced back and went home feeling amazing 6 hours later. A walk in the park compared to first birth

CornishTiger · 24/10/2020 19:38

Waters broke towards end with the first two.

Waters broke after an hour of niggles with third. Luckily I had just popped to lol so no mess. The pain did ramp up a bit more with him due to waters going but it was positive pain and I could tell he wouldn’t be long.

In short I’ve had hospital birth, birth centre and home. All were different. Birth centre was my fave but they wouldn’t let me third time around due to Bmi. So I home birthed.

I’d recommend a debrief on your birth if possible. I didn’t have one from first birth til my third one 11 years on and I’m so glad I did as I had a lot of unresolved birth trauma I was holding onto.

Gerdticker · 24/10/2020 20:09

Agree with @CornishTiger ; try to get a birth debrief where you go through your notes with a midwife.

I had a traumatic time postpartum (birth was great but I had a retained placenta) and I was very confused about the choices made for my care.

I didn’t speak to anyone until 3 years after, and it has helped so much. I now know that some dubious decisions were made, and I would have had a claim for negligence if I’d wanted to do that..

BUT what actually helped me was 1.) knowing it wasn’t my fault, I didn’t do anything wrong 2.) much of the problem was circumstantial and unlikely to happen again 3.) as well as some inadequate care, I also had some incredible nursing in HDU afterwards - where you just marvel at the NHS and the staff and feel so immensely grateful.

So I have managed to come away feeling balanced and positive (which is lucky as I’m due to give birth to DC2 any day now, hence why I wanted read this post Grin)

Talking really is the best healer. As my midwife said, keep talking about it until you’re bored Smile

Shelby30 · 24/10/2020 20:46

Mine were both very different.

1st enduced at 41wks. They broke my waters and put me on drip. Long story short but after 15hrs of a back to back labour I had an emcs due to baby distress, failure to progress 3-4cms and I had fever fast heart rate as I picked up an infection. We were in hospital 6 days 5 nights, both of us on antibiotics, it was hell!

2nd baby was supposed to be planned section. My waters broke at 37+4. Contractions started 15mins later and went from a bit painful to agony very quickly. Eventually 12hrs later emcs I chose not to try a vaginal delivery, I did have the option at the hospital. Left the next evening, they wanted to me stay but no way post natal wards are awful. I went home with a catheter in and had to go bk a few days later to get it out.

myotherusernameisonholiday · 24/10/2020 20:54

Congratulations on your baby OP!
My first birth awful, I was very poorly and had an awful recovery too partly due to large blood loss.
Second was incredibly positive in comparison, 2.5 hours from start to finish and I was up and about almost straight away. It was amazing how different and how much better it was.
I was induced for both, both overdue and large babies, second was heaviest. I tore the same for both. Different hospitals.
Part of me feels like one of the reasons 2nd birth was so much better was that I felt I knew what was coming and I could handle it better, knowing what was to come. I was empowered and was also more vocal in asking to be checked and stating what I ideally wanted to happen wrt pain relief. My second birth made me heal a lot from the horrors of the first! Due to having different hospitals for both I have my notes from first birth which, for me, was good to have, to know what had happened.

Ohdeariedear · 24/10/2020 21:01

Both inductions with first pessary in at 4 pm the day before birth.

Birth 1, mild labour pains from about 5am, waters broken by midwife about 8.30, syntocin (?) at mid-day to move things along, started pushing at 5pm, baby arrived at 6.15.

Birth 2, mild labour pains at 4am, stronger labour pains at 5 am, full-on contractions at 6am, started pushing at 7am, three pushes later, baby arrived at 7.05.

I was fully expecting labour 2 to be the same as labour 1 so was delighted to be done so quickly. It was slightly shocking, the speed, but it was so great - having thought I’d be at it all day, to be done and dusted before breakfast was excellent!

DelurkingAJ · 24/10/2020 21:07

First was 24 hour labour, back to back (not spotted until registrar demanded a scan to find out why I wasn’t progressing). Episiotomy and a million people in the room when they finally dragged him out with forceps. DH traumatised as he ‘kept having to hit the big red button’. They’d been discussing knocking me out for an EMCS (I hadn’t had an epidural they could top up) when he finally arrived sunny-side up as they couldn’t turn him (short umbilical cord). Sewn up uncomfortably tight. Drs genuinely pleased that he didn’t need to be whisked off and surprised that I could stand.

DS2, in labour, DH rang triage and they were full. Slight panic as they rang round to get us in elsewhere with DH told to dial 999 if I started to want to push. Luckily we were found another hospital and were there after a slightly worrying half hour drive. Gave birth about an hour later, gas and air, lovely midwife, DH and nobody else needed. Apart from the venue change all was much much easier.

PopsicleHustler · 25/10/2020 06:09

I have had 4 children and currently expecting my 5th, so will five you the low down down low on all 4 births.

My first baby was late by 11 days. Given 3 pessaries to get things going. It was a two day affair from when I was given the first pessary to when I delivered. It was the 3rd pessary that finally got the ball rolling and I wanted to get in the bath and pretty much labour there. The bath really helped me and I would have delivered in the bath but was then brought out as the bath was too narrow for me to give birth in. Got out and gave birth in the bed. 40 mins of pushing. I was scared I couldn't do it. It was awful. The pushing was worse than the labour. After 40 mins of pushing , out he came. No tears. Just grazes, which no one tells you about. I went to the toilet after and screamed in pain, and had to quickly rush to get the jug go pour down myself as I went. That was 48 hour from start to finish by 14 and a half hours from first contractions to delivery.

Second baby. Worst labour ever. But lol, look at me now on number 5 so it certainly didnt put me off.

Hubby and I did the business. An hour or so later around about midnight, I got qqqup to go to the toilet. And oh low and behold, my waters started coming. Called him as he had just left for night shift and my best friend who was also going to be my labour partner. She thought I was joking because it just so happened that we had been out all that day getting the last bits in together. Got to the hospital sort of 2am, and they wanted to keep me and monitor me.....
I was having contractions but spaced apart and was literally feeling ok to go home. But because my waters had gone, they wanted to keep me in and also to keep an eye on baby as she is measuring small. Still nothing was happening really. Then ag 6PM the next day after so 18 hours after my waters went, they put me on the drip. Absolutely hate it. It was awful. Was.on it for 6 hours after also been given a pessary. Couldn't take it anymore. Gas and air wasnt helping. She was back to back. The contractions were so strong. Was examined and apparently I was only 2cm, and the midwife left to do something, and then oh low and behold I felt the urge to push. I had literally gone from 2cm to 10cm In the matter of a few minutes. Pushed her out in about a minute. Was so easy as she was so small, didnt hurt one bit. She was just 5lb. Disnt really have grazes either. All in all since first waters broke and the spaced out mild contractions to delivery was a total of 48 hours. But from the pessary and the drip it was a total of 6 hours. It was also a difficult recovery. The after pains from breastfeeding were bloody terrible.

3rd baby born 2016. I was asleep and hubby was on night shift. Waters went around 1am. Called him to get home sharpish, as it's our 3rd baby things could happen quicker. Anyway, the hunk gets home after about an hour with large sanitary pads for me. We drop off our other 2 children at our aunts at like 3am. Rush to the hospital where a midwife examined me. I am only 2cm dilated. She tells me to go home. So hubby and girl home. We pretty much spend the day at home I clean the whole house top to bottom to speed things along and go for walks. Roughly 5PM, they are getting more intense. Hubby takes me to hospital and they examine me. I'm 3cm now. They tell me to go home, again. Back home andbtjen 9PM thing really start picking up. My best friend comes so she can be there and help me. I'm given pethidine at about 9PM and sent to the antenatal ward. Pethidine pretty much zoned me out and made me sleepy. I slept til roughly 5am. Woke up and had a bath, came back to antenatal ward and was examined by midwife. Was 7cm. Got into the birthing pool, which was what I always wanted. it was a dream come true. The water really helps. Got in the pool at about 7am and delivered the baby at 10.30am. Was definitely easier and more relaxing pushing in the water. He was delivered. Again no tears, just slight grazes which were fine with a jug of water as youre going. However, the midwife ditched us as soon as he was born. I was left on the bed. I wouldnt even call it that. It was leather gym mats on a sofa next o the birthing pool. I was left on that. I didnt even know how much he weighed until she appeared an hour or so later. No explanation nothing. I would completely understand if there was an emergency. But she didnt say anything. Anyway, that was definitely my easiest labour and easiest recovery. I was just so at ease. No stress. Definitely highly recommend water births. All in all it was 36 hour labour from when the waters went and the spaced out contractions. But from when things kicked off in the evening before til the morning I delivered was 13 hours.

4th baby. Born 2018.
Boy, this is a story. So the usual. Contractions started happening around 2am. Woke up and was like it could happen quicker withit being our 4th child. Called husband as he was on the night shift. Told him and he said he will be home soon. Was having contractions every 5 to 10 minutes roughly. At roughly 7am, hubby and I dropped off all the kids at our aunts and we went to the hospital. Was examined and was only 2cm dilated. Must add I had the sweep, 2 days before. They sent me home so off we went back home. Played games, slept, had a shower, watched movies. I was also dancing and going up and down the stairs and trying everything to get the ball rolling. Hubby took us back to the hospital around 10pm, things.qwre getting very intense. Guess what, I was only 3cm. They were ready to send me home. I then hung around for a bit. Examined again by the worst midwife in history. A lady who clearly didnt like me from whe I met her in antenatal. She gave me an internal to check how far along I was. While she gave me the internal she dug her nails in and scratches me. Can you believe it. I was saying ow ow, and she didnt stop. Afterwards I put my hands up so she could help me up. She put her hands behind her back and told me to get up myself. She was horrible. She then gave me the pethidine and am pretty sure it wasnt administered properly as it wore off within an hour or so. And I was struggling to cope. Rang the bell and a midwife examined me. I was 4cm. She said you can come to the labour ward now. I was at that time in the antenatal ward. Asked for a water birth. They said we will start filling it up now for you. Awesome. They then said that they are getting a midwife for me. I told them straight away, I dont want that horrible midwife. They said they won't arrange her but another lovely midwife, who was really nice and caring. She helped me into the birthing pool. I was just having gas and air. But because my contractions slowed down, she wanted me out to help me break my waters. I asked if I can get back into the birthing pool afterwards. She said absolutely no problem. Then her shift came to an end and another midwife swapped over with her.
I told midwife now, I wanted to get back into the birthing pool. She said no she cant put me back into the birthing pool, as she has a bad back. I was thinking to myself, seriously. So, I cant have my water birth because you have a bad back. Shouslnt it be about me. My husband wasnt even aware if this until I told him a few weeks ago. And I asked him, would it be rude of me to ask for s different midwife. My husband said no, because it's your labour. Again the pains were getting more intense. I was literally close to giving birth. I was begging to get back into the birthing pool. She said no. In a matter of fact voice. I was upset. Then baby was literally in the birthing canal ,ready to come out but she was stuck. They were getting ready to give me the drip as well. I was like errr, no , not the drip again. They said we are going to have to call the doctor. The baby is stuck. But this point I was in bloody agony. And was desperate for a wee. Turned out, the walk to the toilet helped move her back into the birthing canal and I pushed her out in about 3 or 4 pushes. Husband couldn't believe how quickly I delivered. I was very upset that i couldn't have my water birth but glad it was all over with. I was extremely weak after 32 hour labour and was sick after all the gas and air. But she was worth it. The worst part was the after pains they were so bad I was doubled over in pain, whenever I breastfed. No tears, only grazes. Was 32 hours labour total and probably 12 hours from when I went back to the hospital when things started getting more intense if that makes sense.

I seem to have really long labours. And really hoping it wont be the case with baby number 5 due January. But knowing my history, it will probably be the same thing again haha.

Out of all my labours my easiest was definitely number 3, it was very easy labouring at home and the water birth. I really hope to have a water birth with this one. Easiest delivery was my 2nd baby, I think that was because she was so small.

Does anyone else think that it was weird or rude of the midwife who said no, I cant have a water birth , because she has a bad back. Would I have been rude to ask for another midwife, that can assist me in the pool. I always wondered, maybe I would have been very cheeky if I had said that. I wouldn't have asked rudely. I would have just said, please can I have another midwife as the birthing pool is really helping me and I want to give birth in the water. I just found her very rude and abrupt. Anyone else think she was in the wrong?

PopsicleHustler · 25/10/2020 06:09

Wow, so sorry my post was long as a book.

Panicmode1 · 25/10/2020 06:13

My first was 9lbs 8, back to back, 3 days in labour, epidural, episiotomy, ventouse, every pain relief drug by the end, the works. I was terrified of doing it again. But my second was 4 hours from first contraction to arrival with no pain relief.....number 4 arrived within 7 minutes of arriving at the delivery suite door Grin

DemolitionBarbie · 25/10/2020 06:22

First 2.5 daysish, ended with c section. Second less than 12 hours start to finish, established labour only about three hours. Fast and furious! And dc2 was over 9lbs.

namechangefail2020 · 25/10/2020 06:38

You don't wanna know, I'm trying to block it out haha

iano · 25/10/2020 06:47

First a total nightmare. Ended op with ptsd from it.

Second gas and air in the pool. It was a huge contrast. I hope you have a similar experience when the time comes.

Whatthedoodle · 25/10/2020 09:48

My first labour my waters broke at 36 weeks and I went into labour naturally straight away. It took over 24 hours before baby was born. He was back to back and ‘active labour’ was about 13 hours.

With my second I was induced at 39 weeks. I only had the initial pessary and didn’t need anything else. Active labour was 40 minutes.

My second was a breeze!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page