23 and pregnant

[lilly02]

Anybody else in there early 20's and pregnant?
I'm so excited but I can't help but worry that I'm young and the things that people consider you have to have before having a baby I don't have! For example, mortgage, "dream" job and lots of savings.
I know I'll be an amazing mum and I have the best support system but oh my god the anxiety around having a baby is so real.
Not really a question here just expressing the worry of having a child when your life isnt 100 percent put together xx

I had my first at 19. I’m now 25, pregnant with baby 3. I had none of those things either, but I made it work and that’s all that matters 💖

I’m sure you’ll be a great mum regardless of having your own home, dream job, etc! Xx

Hi OP,

I'm 28 - rent, have barely any savings and far from my dream job. You don't need any of these things in order to be a great parent. And, sadly, a 'dream' job happens to people very rarely, I've found.

Our baby was unexpected, so we now have savings since finding out. It's been hard, especially as I was furloughed for the first three months of my pregnancy, but worth it in the end.

Congratulations!
I was a young mum, 21 with dd1 and 24 with dd2, now pregnant with no 3 at 38.
I'm finding the pregnancy more tiring this time round and have no regrets to starting young.
Just enjoy it and if you're like me things will fall into place, just in a different order.
Good luck xx

Hey, I'm 24 and pregnant, too! I have a rubbish part-time job, rent a tiny 2 bed flat and still have a year of uni to finish once babe is here, so I totally understand how you feel. Happy to chat if you feel up to it! :)

@Yellowbeansontoast

Hey, I'm 24 and pregnant, too! I have a rubbish part-time job, rent a tiny 2 bed flat and still have a year of uni to finish once babe is here, so I totally understand how you feel. Happy to chat if you feel up to it! :)

Yes I would love too!! Thankyou for replying ❤️ I know we will all be amazing mums but the worry of not having everything completely straight is still there. How far along are you? Xx

@FallingStar

Congratulations! I was a young mum, 21 with dd1 and 24 with dd2, now pregnant with no 3 at 38. I'm finding the pregnancy more tiring this time round and have no regrets to starting young. Just enjoy it and if you're like me things will fall into place, just in a different order. Good luck xx

Aw Thankyou so much! Congrats on this pregnancy! Xx

@Bluejayway91

Hi OP,

I'm 28 - rent, have barely any savings and far from my dream job. You don't need any of these things in order to be a great parent. And, sadly, a 'dream' job happens to people very rarely, I've found.

Our baby was unexpected, so we now have savings since finding out. It's been hard, especially as I was furloughed for the first three months of my pregnancy, but worth it in the end.

Yes this is true. Thankyou x

@Queenbee95

I had my first at 19. I’m now 25, pregnant with baby 3. I had none of those things either, but I made it work and that’s all that matters 💖

I’m sure you’ll be a great mum regardless of having your own home, dream job, etc! Xx

Aww congratulations ❤️ how lovely! Thankyou xx

Hi OP, congratulations!! I was 24 when I found out I was pregnant with DS, turned 25 whilst I was pregnant. I don’t own my dream home/have my dream job/have lots of savings and I’m not doing too bad! You will be absolutely fine, I’ve been quite surprised by how little you really need, I think Instagram pushes spend spend spend but it’s not at all needed.

Since becoming a mum I’ve had a massive change in focus, I know what is important and what I need to do to get there. My life isn’t put together yet but I feel a lot more grounded and content with what I have for now and positive about how to get to the “end goal” because now I have a person to do it all for!

You can already tell you will be brilliant mum by how much you care.

I know I'll be an amazing mum

Not to be negative OP, but nobody can possibly know this until they’re in the situation and I’ve rarely come across a mum who thought they were amazing at it. If anything, I think it’s completely natural as a mum to want the best for your child/ren so you constantly second guess yourself and the decisions you make because you want to do everything “right” when there isn’t a right answer, just doing the best you can.

That said, I don’t really think your age matters all that much, nor some of the other things you mention, as long as you can provide a safe and secure environment for your child to grow up in, feed them, clothe them, etc. It’s also a huge benefit to have a good support system around you which many people don’t have.

Good luck

I was pregnant at 23. It was a perfect age. I loved being a youngish mum. My DD was pregnant at 18. It worked perfectly for her too. Her friend had one at 14 and was an excellent mother. You're far from being too young. Yes, it would be lovely to have the dream job etc. Most don't.

@rottiemum88 I agree...

OP...you will endeavour to be the best mum you can be there is no doubt about that! However the reality of being a mum is much harder than we can imagine. We are CONSTANTLY worrying about what we do/ how we do it/ what effect will it have/ did I make the right decision( and sometimes you won't) we are only human. Don't put yourself on a pedestal just yet! Best of luck. It will all work out eventually...there will be fantastic days and hard days...such is life. And as others have said age is neither her nor there mostly.

I was 21 with DD1 and definitely didn’t have my life together. Ended up as a single mum with just a part time job I’m not going to lie it was tough, but I’d do it all again. Now 30, pregnant with second baby still no dream job, no savings, currently trying to find somewhere to rent. What matters is your child is loved, fed and safe.
I’m sure you will be a great mum and you will make it work.

Hi Op,
I was 23 when I had my son and had all the same worries as you. You just make things work and you will find that baby slots into your life and before you know it will be like you've never been without them.

We also had and still have a fantastic support network and that's something I've never taken for granted.
I'm now 28 and recently found out I'm pregnant with my second. I still don't feel like I'm 100% where I want to be in life, but when do you ever really know when that is anyway!?

Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy x

Hi congrats! I’m 20 and due any day now and I’m nothing but excited, my baby is priority and the other stuff will come when it’s the time, just enjoy your new role as mummy, plenty of women manage I’m sure we can too x

I had my first at 16. Pregnant at 15 sat all my GCSEs just 2 months before he was born. Had DD at 19 and I'm now nearly 10 years on and trying for a third. Nothing wrong with being a young mum. I have coped well. Rent a 3 bed house. Work 24 hours a week whilst they are both at school. Eldest is now 12. Quite scary how time flies. Enjoy it. Congratulations 🎉 xx

Hi I'm 23 and pregnant and I've just found out! I'm also scared and excited you're not alone! :)

I had four by the time I was 24! Dont worry, everything will be fine. I dont have a single regret, It was great. If I could go back I would do it all again! Dont pay attention to what others think either. :)

Hey! I'm 22 and currently 9+2 weeks. We started TTC when I was 20! Definitely don't have our lives together but we're stable and have a steady income etc and have wanted this for so long it's so worth it! 🥰

I got pregnant with my first at 23 and gave birth at 24, then had another baby at 26. I had a badly paid job I hated, a rented house and no idea what I wanted to do with my life so I decided to do the baby stage while I tried to figure it all out! It worked out well for us as since my job wasn't particularly important to me I didn't have to worry about career progression or putting in the hours, I worked the min hours I needed to to keep my job and help pay the bills and the rest of the time got to spend lots of quality time with my dcs. Once the youngest was at preschool I was free to focus on all the career progression stuff and now have a job I love on a good wage and can afford all the nice holidays we could never have pre kids.

Congratulations! I’ve just turned 24 and am pregnant with baby number 5! Even after so many I have anxiety about new baby coming lol unsure why as I’ve basically been pregnant since age 15 🙈 I say aslong as you have a good support network you will be absolutely fine and welcome to motherhood x

Congratulations!

I am 23 and have just found out I am pregnant with my first. My partner and I live with my parents although we are looking at houses. However, I can’t help questioning whether I am ready.