Thought I was pregnant ; now I'm devastated

[FutureMama94]

I wasn't TTC at the time I missed my period. My Period is usually right on time with clear symptoms ( tenderness, nausea, lack of appetite, pms etc). This time my PMS was so bad but no period. I didn't get many pregnancy symptoms (was a little sensitive to smell, nausea and cramping). I started thinking I was pregnant as I've never had a late period before and this one was 9 days late . Finally bought a test online and just before it arrived I got spotting. I was devastated. I've wanted to have a child for a long time but didn't want to feel the pressure that can sometimes come with TTC so I tried to pretend I didn't really care. This made it worse.

Spent the whole day crying and saw 2 pregnancy announcements right after. Seems like everyone is talking about babies. I haven't told my partner yet as I feel theres nothing to tell and he's not as excited as me about conceiving so it might make the sadness worse.

Haven't had a full period yet, it was just spotting but took the test when it finally arrived and it was for sure Negative, not even a faint line that I could have a small margin of hope.

Starting to feel a bit discouraged as some family members and friends have really wanted children and haven't been able to, I'm scared I'll end up in the same predicament.

Anyone have any advice on how to feel more confident and trust my body again?

Are you actively preventing pregnancy? If so you need to talk it through with your partner if you want to actively try, you can still do that without going full on charting and ovulation sticks. Most couples don't have issues and have sucess within a couple of years of active trying I believe. Also periods are little blighters they know what you want and do the opposite I swear. Good luck

Like the other poster I'm not clear if you were actively avoiding pregnancy or just seeing what happened at the time your period was late @FutureMama94. Either way I would say to your partner what happened and say that your feelings of sadness make it really clear how much you want a baby.

To go for it, you have 2 options. The chill out version is to have sex every 2 or 3 days. The full on version is to use OPKs and temp, but it's quite stressful and doesnt necessarily add any additional chance of success. Assuming no fertility issues, 92% of couples conceive within a year of non protected sex every few days.

Thank you for your replies ! Not actively preventing pregnancy but not using charts, schedules or anything for 2 years. Nothing yet. Both in our mid-late 20's . DP Is lovely but is like a dear, if he feels ANY pressure he backs out so I want to take my time. Decided to bring it up during a chill activity and see what he says

If your DP isn’t as excited about conceiving then why on earth aren’t you using contraception? What do you think would happen if you get pregnant? You might not get the reaction you are hoping for.

Obviously if your partner knows you aren't using contraception then he knows pregnancy is a risk, I think PP is being a little harsh.

You have regular periods and you are still in your mid 20's, there is no reason to think that you will not be able to have a baby. I have sturggled with infertility and there is nothing here to indicate that you will too so try not to worry. There is a process to follow IF you don't manage to concieve after actively trying and by actively trying docs don't expect you to do charts etc but they class it as having unprotected sex at least 3 times a week for at least a year. If you have not managed to concieve after actively trying for at least a year, they will do further investigations. Please try not to worry. Putting that stress on yourself will make things worse.

@Pinktruffle thank you! It's been a worry of mine since it has happened a lot in my family including siblings, not sure if it's going to happen to me as well, especially since its been 2 years, thank you for your support some days can be a struggle

@DragonPie I Never said DP wasn't happy for it otherwise we would be using protection. We've got more sense than that ! He just doesn't have the same concerns at the same level as I do, thus is not as emotional. I do agree that IF he wasnt happy for it, getting pregnant wouldn't be the best idea, but that isnt the case.