Older Parents

[Ladyk79]

Thoughts on children later in life....

Hi all, I am blessed to have one child, but had a very traumatic birth. Anyway we are over this now and all is well. We have recenty started talking about having a second. I'm 41 and husband is a little older, so the subject of health risks for me and baby have come up.

Any older parents out there? Would love to hear about your experiences and any advise. TIA x

Hi ya. There are a few threads on here. Ours is something like thread for those classed as mature mums and there is one called old ovaries new lines.

There are loads of us and m generally we have all been well. Most of us have had a miscarriage or mmc up till about 12 weeks so the first trimester is a scary time.

I am now 33 weeks and keeping well and am 41. We also have some big age gaps on the group. I have a ten year old and one mum is having her 8th child. It is a great mix.

The complications are really not that high risk. The screening for downs etc is a worrying time and I also have a high BMI but if you want another go for it. 41 is really not that old. Older, but not old. 😁

Also my first birth was traumatic and one reason for the massive age gap. Also have a new partner. I opted for an elective section due to first birth messiness and there was no issues and they actually recommended it. Obviously it has it's own risks too but should be a more controlled affair

Firstly congratulations!! Thank you for your response Sheera. It is something we both really want (not something I thought we would say after the trauma of the first lol). I was worried I might have got judgy comments but you have been so kind. I have read the risk for downs is much higher so yes worrying. Wishing you all the best with your second xx

My own mum had my sister (3rd child) aged 42.. back in 1987!

My friends sister has just had her first baby at 47! It was a donated egg, but she had a great pregnancy and elective c-section that went well.

There are so many mums over 40 now, the NHS is well set up to look after you. And you are more educated and wise with all that life experience behind you. Go for it xx

We all stressed about downs screening and most got a private test that tells you accurately which helps with worries. They are between £400-500. Mine failed three times as I am a weirdo and very uncommon but my nhs screening came back low risk anyway. You are more likely to get a high risk result as the age goes into the mix and automatically puts the score up but the NIPT/harmony test looks at the chromosomes in the fetal DNA in your blood stream. Some nhs places will do it if you get a high risk result before something invasive like CBS or amnio.

I would go for it as might take a while to concieve. There may be potential heartache but there is that potential in any pregnancy. If you were 51 then things would be a lot riskier, but 41 is not old. 🥰.

And ta on the congrats. These last weeks I am worrying a bit, but deep breaths and so far all scans and bloods and BP etc are all textbook. X

Cvs

Thank you @Gerdticker that’s reassuring to know.

@Sheera1this is true about taking time to conceive. I might go speak to my GP on Monday but thank you, you have defo given me some reassurance.

Yes deep breaths focus on the here and now, I’m sure it will all be fine xx