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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Pregnant after a stillbirth - was you delivered early?

22 replies

CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 10/10/2007 22:33

I am 33 weeks pregnant and had a stillborn dd 2yrs ago at 25 weeks.

I am having a bad day today and just read a very sad story on here about a lady who lost her child at 39 weeks

I feel very insecure and although wanted a natural labour (my eldest dd was a c section and the only natural birth experience i have is my stillborn dd) but now dont think I can last until 40 weeks.

My cons said I could have section at 38 and wondered if anyone else had a similar experience?

Thankyou and sorry to post this as I know its not a subject people want to hear about

OP posts:
coggy · 10/10/2007 22:40

Hello....only me!
No experience of number two (as well you know) but...I was told that they would induce labour at 38 weeks next time (if I have a next time!!) and I think I would probably need to go for that.

Not a lot of help but didn't want to ignore you.

Sorry to hear that you are having a bad time today.
X

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 10/10/2007 22:46

Coggy

Sorry its not happened for you yet

They cant induce me as I had a section with first dd.It would have to be another section.

Maybe tomorrow will be different.

OP posts:
LaylaandSethsmum · 10/10/2007 22:50

Sorry to hear about your loss CP, I don't have personal experience but a couple of people I know have had elective sections, they felt it was safer that way without the risks that a natural labour can involve, I think they wanted someone else to be in control of it all aswell. Do what you think is best if you would feel reassured that your baby will be born on a certain day with a section then go for that.xx

coggy · 10/10/2007 22:54

I didn't realise that...
I do hope tomorrow is better.
Not easy to read about other people's experiences either is it?
I've just read poor Cozzor's thread.

We're told how rare it is...but lots of people seems to experience, or know of someone who's life has been touched with the tragedy of SB.

I do pray that all continues smoothly for you over the next few weeks.
X

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 10/10/2007 23:00

Thanks.

I suppose my need for a healthy baby outweighs my need for a natural labour. I am seeing cons on Monday and will think about it over the weekend.

Baby is growing well and very active but so many horrible stories Coggy,your right.

Just hope all goes well for us both
x

OP posts:
Bubble99 · 10/10/2007 23:10

CP. I had an elective CS after my sb. There was no way I would risk a natural labour after the previous disaster.

I went back to the same hospital, which surprised a lot of people - but I did so as I knew I would get gold star treatment. And I did.

CristinaTheAstonishing · 10/10/2007 23:19

I had a stillborn baby at 35 weeks pg. No reasons found. The next birth was a planned CS at 38 weeks due to previous stillborn baby, previous traumatic vaginal delivery (for both me and my baby - he's fine now), gestational diabetes. I've now had another baby who was also a planned CS. This was brought forward by a couple of days as I was feeling less movement and had started contractions too. She had the cord around her neck but the doctors said it's quite a frequent finding. Well, I was thankful we didn't wait any longer.

So sorry to hear about your loss, CP, and I know how any magic and innocence of pregnancy are lost after such an experience. My only very "natural" birth was with my stillborn baby but I don't miss not having the experience as much as I do not having my baby son. Good luck over the next few weeks and I look forward to hearing your positive birth story.

dalilaa · 12/10/2007 16:46

Hi CP just offering support, I have not posted for a while and have not had the same experience but I had a SB at 36 weeks and they said next time (I hope there is one)they would induce me at 38 as well. You have to do what you feel is right. You will make it and i can't wait to to see the thread. my thoughts are with you. xx

Glimmer · 12/10/2007 17:15

Hi CP, I second everything that has been said: in the end it's what you think is best for you that should be the deciding factor. And obviously, the consultanst's advice. I have not had a SB, but am suffering from post-traumatic stress after miscarriage complications (I was first the 1:100 and then the 1:10000 making me the 1:1000000) and I think a lot about SB, especially since I plan a home birth.

From what I read I decided that I personally prefer the risk of a natural birth over that of a CS. Is there any evidence that the rate of SB is higher in a natural births? But on the other side you might feel more in control having schedulesd a CS and that will take some of the anxieties from you. Can you schedule one and then decide to go natural if you feel like it?

Wishing you all the best. I can only imagine how difficult this must be for you and send you many thoughts.

IWantToBePositive · 12/10/2007 17:21

It isn't the same as my baby boy survived but after he wouldn't have made it through a natural delivery I was scanned weekly with number 2 as the docs didn't know what had gone wrong with number one, and wanted to keep a close eye.

The chances of nother stillbirth are very small but you do what you feel is best for you and your baby.

I am so sorry for your loss 2 years ago.

IWantToBePositive · 12/10/2007 17:22

BTW Are you sure you can't be induced? I was due to be induced with number 2 (number 1 was a emergency section) but I went into labour before they could do it.

goingfor3 · 12/10/2007 17:22

I'm really sorry for your loss. You really need to do whatever will put your mind at rest.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 12/10/2007 21:16

If I could be induced early that would be best for me.I was told that having a previous section I could not be induced but I will ask on Monday

Thnanks

OP posts:
CarGirl · 12/10/2007 21:21

A friend had a sb (due to some condition that it is prevented in future pregnancies by having daily injections) at 37&3 she had her subsequent dc induced at 37 weeks so that mentally she didn't have to go past that point again.

Presumably a big difference in her case is that they knew the cause and 37 weeks is considered term - and she hadn't had c-section either!

threestars · 13/10/2007 18:00

Hi Chocolate P,
I'm in a similar situation as you, whereby DS1 was born by emergency CS (after failed forceps), and DS2 was a natural birth but he was stillborn at 25 weeks.
The natural birth gave me confidence that I can in fact push a baby out, which I was previously convinced I couldn't, but I'm still nervous about this next pregnancy, like you. Once you've gone though a stillbirth, you suddenly become aware of all dangers and feel vulnerable to them.
Knowing that the previous CS means a choice between the 2 is a comfort to me(especially after reading other people's stories on support websites - I really appreciated the help on them, but became even more aware of problems too).
Even if you say yes to a CS or an induction now, you can change your mind at any time up till the operation/induction date.
Good luck.
xxx

CristinaTheAstonishing · 13/10/2007 18:04

Threestars - I had a very "natural" vaginal delivery of my stillborn son but this was partly because there was no need to worry anymore about the health of the baby so no monitoring etc was needed. I hope this doesn't come across as too pesimistic.

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 13/10/2007 18:34

I am in two minds about what to do.I will see what cons says on Monday as he has treated me for the last few years so I trust him.

I have days of feeing v confident as baby is very active then days of massive doubt.I have posted seperately on here about friend who is having difficult time at moment and I suppose thats knocked my confidence a bit.

threestars are you ttc?

OP posts:
Popi70 · 13/10/2007 19:36

chocolatepeanut,
I am very sorry for your loss. I also lost two babies at 25 weeks and I have been advice to choose the induction option this time around. Like you my need to have a healthy baby at the end of the day- when there is already a 'bad' history there - outweighs the need to have the experience of a 'natural' labour at 40 + weeks.
popi

threestars · 15/10/2007 15:20

Hello again.
Chocolate Peanut, I'm 15 weeks pregnant, and have just over a week to go until a scan which will tell me whether this baby has or has not the same problem as DS2 had, so until then I'm burying my head in the sand a bit.
Christina The Astonishing, I think you are voicing exactly what I am nervous about, and perhaps what anybody who has experienced a stillbirth worries about.
Before I'd ever given birth, all pregnancy books made me think a natural birth was soooo important. Now, I don't think it matters a jot, it's simply important to have that healthy baby in your arms.
CP hope the appointment with your consultant went ok.

Marina · 15/10/2007 15:26

I think you should do what you feel comfortable with Chocolatepeanut. I had my section at 39 + 5 but it was an agonising time throughout and I think if my consultant had offered managed induction at 38 weeks I'd have jumped at the chance. In fairness, at 38 weeks I was still hoping for a term live delivery VBAC (like you I had an elective for ds then a stillbirth at 22 weeks).
Sad news such as on that thread really does knock you for six, doesn't it.
Hope tomorrow is a better day for you CP

Original poster
CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 15/10/2007 19:56

It went well with Consultant.I am booked to see him the first Monday after my due date which is two days after.

On this date he will examine me and if my cervix is getting ready for birth (I may well have delivered before this date naturally) he will induce me then.

If there are no signs of labour starting I will have c section the following day.Either way baby will be born by 3 days after due and its not a case of a definate section if I pass my due date.

Seems a long way off but I felt cheered up leaving hospital and went on a spree in Mothercare spending £200

OP posts:
Marina · 16/10/2007 13:36

Oh good, glad it went well and you were able to enjoy going on a splurge!

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