NOT getting another early scan - your thoughts

[chaosisaladder]

Hi all

I’m currently 9+4. Third pregnancy, unplanned. Complete shock. Trying to detach a bit from it as I’m awful at being pregnant (hyperemesis, gets diabetes, perinatal anxiety/depression etc).

I went for a scan a few weeks ago at 6ish weeks - heartbeat and everything looked as it should.

I’m getting worried - for no reason - and really trying to fight against getting another reassurance scan. In my last pregnancy, I had one at 9 weeks and everything was fine, but I bled heavily the next week (hematoma that wasn’t seen on the scan) - baby was fine but I swore then I’d never do another early scan because they only offer relief for me there and then.

I suppose I’m writing this because I just need a hand-hold. Anyone else waiting for their 12 week scan and fighting the urge to go for an earlier scan? I’ve taken time off work due to hyperemesis and I just don’t want all of this to be for nothing.

I'm actually forgoing any early scan for this exact reason. I'm a person who seeks reassurance and 'more info'' when I feel anxious.

Reassurance (having a scan) is unfortunately not effective in reducing anxiety. We think it will be effective, and we get a fab temporary relief from anxiety when we get reassurance... but then it just comes back stronger ("what if something has gone wrong JUST AFTER the scan? It's still so long to wait"). Feeling more relaxed can also start to become conditional on getting the reassurance (so you want more and more scans because that's the only time you feel relaxed).

For that reason I'm going to wait for the 12 weeks one.

(Can you tell I work in mental health haha?)

In the meantime I'm telling myself:
4/5 pregnancies, 80%, make it through the first trimester.
I and my body are doing everything we can to keep this bean healthy.
Early miscarriage is usually due to genetic non viability so theres nothing I can do or not do but wait and see.

I am having one in 9 days at 7+4 after a miscarriage last time because it's what I need - to actually see that this pregnancy is progressing. I probably won't have another one however if I feel that I need more reassurance I'll book one. I have never had a scan before (unless you count the miscarriage scan, I don't) but I've read very similar to what you're saying that they give you relief but then it's gone. To me I'd rather have fleeting relief than 12 weeks of anxiety haha so I say if you find you need one book one.

Hi I am In a similar boat. I had a MC in April of this year and I am currently 7+2 I am very tempted to get a early scan just to check things are progressing as last time baby's heartbeat and growth stopped at 5-6 weeks and I didn't loose baby until 9 weeks.

I am resisting the urge to go for one for the same reason as you are, @chaosisaladder because an early scan will give me temporary relief and then after I will worry until my next scan about what if something happens. So I am just going to wait for my 12wk scan and hope for the best, -fingers crossed-

I'm the same. I've had private scans at 7 weeks, then 11 weeks, then my NHS one at 13 weeks, then another private at 15 weeks and I'm desperate for another one already - its been 6 days and my next NHS one is less than a month away. Its never ending and I always think it will improve once I'm feeling movements but it doesn't because I then obsess over them - I'm only just 16 weeks and if I spend most nights soon as the kids are in bed lying there deathly still so I don't miss a single kick. There must be a more constructive way to deal with the anxiety but I dont know what it is

this is so interesting! we are so toying with the idea of going next week when will be like 8 and a bit weeks. but then, as some of u say, it is just short lived reassurance and i'll spend the next 4 weeks stressing more?? and @TheDaydreamBelievers u r totally right with that last paragraph!
i do wonder whether like @Bl0ndi3 i could just do with some fleeting relief (hopefully) or else find out something now sooner rather than later...? its so hard isnt it! it says it all i havent bitten the bullet and just booked one yet...defo sat on the fence!

@ShinyGreenElephant

It's a naturally super anxious time - so much uncertainty and so little control, plus something we care so so much about! So it's totally normal to feel this way, but it must also be really exhausting.

I'd recommend maybe looking into some anxiety management techniques including-

Deep breathing
Progressive muscle relaxation
Podcasts and CDs (some available for pregnancy specifically)
Positive affirmations - "my body was made to do this" "my body is doing all it can to keep this baby healthy" etc
Trying to challenge negative thoughts for example answering the thought "what if something is wrong?" With "what if it's all right?" Or "I'm worried I will misscarry" with "it's very unlikely in trimester 2, health professionals are happy with our progress"

You know the scan is bad for you OP.
The scan doesn't guarantee anything.

Having a reassurece scan around 8/9 weeks, although is obviously a 'snapshot' in time, is actually a very good indication that the pregnancy is going to progress. Most miscarriages do happen before this time and although it's no garentee of course, it can really releave anxiety. It did for me, and I'd never had an early scan before and had a miscarriage at 12 weeks, so I knew it wasn't my golden ticket to a healthy and alive baby.

But 'fact wise' seeing the heartbeat and dates measuring well ect at around 9 weeks is a really positive indication of a healthy pregnancy that will continue.

Getting into a cycle of scanning a lot is definitely not entirely healthy of course as it then brings its own scanxiety, but having one at 8/9 weeks is fairly sensible I think to also eliminate a blighted ovum which often gives you major pregnancy symptoms all the way up to that 12 week scan when there is no baby at all

Thanks all.

I think I’m going to persevere. It’s so hard as I know it’s different for everybody. I just really think for myself that it won’t achieve anything. I just needed to sound this out so thank you all ♥️

I had every intention of waiting for the 12 week scan. Unfortunately due to unexplained bleeding I had to have scans at the EPU. My experience is that scans do not reduce anxiety for more than about five minutes.

Yes me.
After my miscarriage in Jan was picked up by an early scan at 9 weeks, I knew I wanted another this time as the thought of getting to 12 weeks to find out was too much for me.
Went at 7, everything was great. I'm 10+5 now and the urge to go again is killing me. I'm trying not to feed my anxiety but it's so hard. People say to me 'well you've still got symtoms and no bleeding so everything's fine' which doesn't help me at all as I had symptoms and no bleeding last time and it wasn't! I keep checking the scan place to see available slots but I'm not going to go. 😬
Good luck.

@TheDaydreamBelievers thanks so much, that's really helpful. I will definitely use some of these ideas, love the positive affirmations