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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Writing a Birth Plan

22 replies

theresaplaceforus · 21/09/2020 06:46

Did you do one? How does it need to be set out and what things should I include?

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Helenknowsbest · 21/09/2020 07:17

I did not have one, my plan was to go in and have a baby. Think I just went in with an open mind. Glad I did

physicskate · 21/09/2020 07:25

I did. It wasn't a 'plan' more like preferences if certain things happened. Had my preferences for delayed cord clamping (if possible, though it's pretty standard). My preference for an epidural if my labour was induced of augmented. How I wanted third stage. Skin to skin, vit k, etc...

Everything was phrased with stuff like, if it's safest to do so...

It was just so I didn't have to make as many decisions when I wasn't in a state to make decisions.

Shawla92 · 21/09/2020 07:43

As a poster above has said I have just started writing mine but it is more preferences than a set plan as I am hyper aware that births are not straight forward. I went on Tommy's.org which helped me to write mine. Once discussed with midwife I'm going to type it up and put one in my notes and give 1 to my partner.

Superscientist · 21/09/2020 08:23

I just went through the plan at the back of maternity notes with my midwife. She told me what was available (pain relief /birthing pools, delayed clamping ) and what could happen (induction & assisted delivery etc). I consented to everything and in terms of pain relief I put to start with gas and air and that I was open to suggestions at the time.

I gave my partner instructions to help me make decisions that kept me as calm as possible and to ask questions around why they were suggesting interventions and similar.

In the end the directions to my partner were the most useful as he encouraged me to call to go in for pain relief when I was struggling at home. As a result I arrived at the hospital just in time to start pushing, without him twigging I was probably further along than I thought I would have had her at the side of the road or on the bathroom floor.

lucyFTM · 21/09/2020 08:27

I haven't done one yet but you can download a template on this page to help you
www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/how-to-make-birth-plan/

xxxemzyxxx · 21/09/2020 10:17

I’ve done preferences as well. I have noted my main preference is to have a water birth With use of gas and air, and if the pools are not available at the time I will most likely want an epidural instead. I have also noted I would prefer them not to offer me other pain relief (I will ask if I want other options) and that I don’t want to be coached to push. I have said I want baby put straight on my chest and want delayed cord clamping.

I have also covered preferences in possible situations such as if a c section is needed I would still want delayed cord clamping, etc.

SqidgeBum · 21/09/2020 10:22

I wrote one. Nothing I wrote down actually happened.

Babies dont read birth plans. I dont think midwives do either.

1990shopefulftm · 21/09/2020 10:31

I've written down some preferences with regards to pain relief such as not to offer me opiods and what I'd like for the 3rd stage.

I've also written that if I have to go the theatre and/or need general anathestic that they should explain to DH exactly what's going on and what the benefits and risks of any decisions he might have to make for me and baby are, as I don't feel it's right for me to be telling him exact worse case scenarios beforehand but I know if he's given all the facts at that moment he will be able to make the best decision for us.

Disappointedkoala · 21/09/2020 10:34

I used the preference sheet in my file - the midwife went through it at my 34 week appointment (I think!). I'd already thought about my preferences and discussed with DH. The midwives checked it and did follow the instructions, it did somewhat go out of the window later on in labour but I did find them to be respectful of my wishes.

EmilySpinach · 21/09/2020 10:52

More important than a written birth plan is a birth partner who knows and understands your wishes and is prepared to advocate for you, and a birth plan can be a useful point of reference for them. I completely agree with pp who have said it is important to think of it as a set of preferences; anecdotally, the friends who have struggled most with processing their births have been the ones who had very fixed ideas of how they wanted it to go.

Onekidnoclue · 21/09/2020 10:56

I had a birth plan. Was totally ignored by baby and midwives!
I’m due in January and will write another birth plan on the off chance someone pays attention.
Under no circumstances will it say to only provide pain relief if I expressly ask. In my first birth i was terrified and in agony. MW and drs were waiting for me to ask for pain relief. I couldn’t speak for the last 14 hours aside from screams and there’s no way I could have formed a thought and a sentence to request the epidural I really needed.
I’m not saying that would happen to you but I want to everything possible to ensure it doesn’t happy to me again.

micc · 21/09/2020 10:56

My plan was to get to hospital!! Haha, it's going to be the same this time too. Get there in time and drop my DD off at her grandparents

turnthebiglightoff · 21/09/2020 11:00

When I went to hand it to my midwife during labour she laughed and said "honey, you're being induced". I went against everything I'd written on it anyway! I wouldn't bother. Just tel your midwife your preferences but as an example I wanted diamorphone instead of pethidine but my hospital doesn't give it.

HarrietM87 · 21/09/2020 11:29

I didn’t bother with one last time - I just wanted to have the baby safely! This time my midwife has been weirdly insistent about me filling one out, but there is a fairly detailed template in my notes that’s effectively tick box. I’m going to ask for delayed cord clamping, natural third stage unless recommended otherwise, and vitamin K injection for the baby. Otherwise what will be will be!

utterlynutty · 21/09/2020 11:30

I had a birth plan with DC1. That all went out the window when DC decided to arrive super quick and I was fully dilated and ready to push when I arrived at the hospital.No time for any pain relief.
Like others have said,babies don't read birth plans.

TerribleCustomerCervix · 21/09/2020 11:36

I didn’t bother with one, but saw an example of one that a someone had done as a traffic light system, eg-

GREEN; go ahead
Gas and air
DH cutting cord
Vit K injection

ORANGE- Might consider but not ideal
Epidural

RED- No thanks!
Forceps, go for c section

Those are just an example, but it was very easy to read at a glance, and as others have said above it’s just to give an idea of preferences.

Starlight39 · 21/09/2020 11:44

I just did preferences, prefaced by "if safe to do so" and "ideally I'd like" as someone else said. It was really useful as it meant the midwife didn't need to keep asking me things and could see what I;d prefer, given the choice, at a glance. If it hadn't worked out that any of the stuff on it had been used (eg in case of emergency C-section - although I think even then I'd said that I'd like my husband to stay with the baby as much as possible if I couldn't and I'd like skin to skin if poss etc) then it would have been no issue - it was good to get the my preferences down on paper anyway so I did't have to worry about remembering them all when I went into hospital, I think my mind would have been blank at that point!

justwinginglife1 · 21/09/2020 12:09

I'm a very organised person so wrote one with both of my pregnancies.

With DD I arrived at the birthing centre 15 mins before she was born - my birthing plan didn't make it out of my bag.

With DS I was induced so the midwives took my plan. I had requested that no extra people were in the room unless needed, then whilst I was pushing the midwife asked if a student could come in and watch. At that point I couldn't care less so agreed.

I'm glad I did agree though as the student was lovely. It was her first birth to watch and she came in after and thanked me.

I would definitely do a plan, but just be prepared that you may not follow it Smile

MyCassiopiea · 21/09/2020 12:22

I had preferences. I didn't write them down but I told the midwives. I got completely the opposite of what I wanted but it was fine and I'm happy with how my labour went.

Have an idea of what you want but be open to change if needed. I didn't want any interventions but I needed them and they weren't as bad as I thought they would be and recovery was quick.

Roselilly36 · 21/09/2020 12:29

Congrats Op Flowers. As others have said writing a birth plan is possibly the biggest waste of my time ever. Didn’t bother to write one with DS2. It’s great that you know the options, but better to just go with the flow. Good luck.

BiBabbles · 21/09/2020 13:57

There is no need for it or one way a birth plan needs to be set up, but I recommend a bullet point list, starting with what you think is most important for them to know about you.

This has likely changed over the years and there will be COVID specific things to think about that you'll need to discuss with your antenatal midwife, but I've seen it recommended to consider listing: any medical needs they need to know about, preferences if any on pain relief both for labouring and if you needed to go the OR, if there is a birthing partner, who they are and if they want to cut the cord, preferences for managing the third stage, if any, thoughts on student observers. I also recommend listing any fears or concerns & how you'd like to manage them.

In my earlier pregnancies, I had the typical preference list with all the things and then some. I found this not very helpful and not much was done with it. As pp said, a lot isn't in our control and I think while it can feel informative to go through all the options, it can also be a source of added stress.

In my latter pregnancies, I essentially wrote a "I'm terrified and here's why, please be kind' plan rather than a birth plan. It's a 14 short bullet point list, where I focused on my feelings/fears/concerns, how I wanted to handle those concerns and manage my medical needs, the things that were most important to me and my well-being (including medical conditions & things that put me at higher risks), and common admin questions like students observing and things in previous pregnancies.

This was far more useful even if some bits weren't really followed. It had all the most important to me information right there, and - while it looks a bit silly now - I think briefly if repeatedly touching on my anxiety, fears, and feelings of vulnerability and history of medical abuse and how I cope with that gave them a better grasp of how to help me when I did have a panic attack during late stage one labour.

Sanch1 · 21/09/2020 14:06

Like others have said, mine wasnt really a plan, just statements e.g.
-No epidural
-No birth on back
-Want to be mobile
-DH to tell me baby's sex
-DH to cut cord
-Yes to vit K
-Yes for injection to deliver placenta etc

Although the midwives tend to ask you all that through the course of your labour anyway! But at least its there to jog minds, or if you forget anything.

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