Miscarriage 11 weeks

[iheartarchie]

Hi, I had a miscarriage yesterday morning at 11 weeks. I'm still in shock by the whole thing. Midwife said there was nothing I done or didn't do and it's just one of those things. I just feel really numb by the whole thing. Last week we were viewing houses with a school and nursery as a priority and now it's all over. My whole body is aching from the physical side of things and I feel guilty for being so anxious and unsure about the pregnancy when I found out and took a while to get my head around. My husband has been brilliant and I feel for him as I think he feels pretty helpless. I just wanted to reach out to anyone who has unfortunately been in similar circumstances and can share their experience of the process and healing. Sorry it's a bit of a depressing post x

Hi @iheartarchie
I had a MMC found at 13 weeks baby heart stopped at 11.5 I then went on to have medical management.
I found the shock the worst part, I was blindsided and felt like I had been hit by a truck for a few weeks. I consently wonder what happened. I later found out mine was due to a partial mole pregnacey.
What your feeling in normal be kind to yourself you have been through a lot. I know our stories are not the same but you will start to feel ok again in time, but for now allow yourself to heal.
💛

Hi, I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my babies at 10 weeks and 8 weeks. I found there were peaks and troughs with the grief. So horrendous days and days where I felt normal. Days where I would go to work and cry for my whole journey home.

For me - I needed something to focus on. We decided quite quickly to try again after the first and that helped my focus - it's not about replacing the baby you lost but continuing to hope for the family you want. Nothing replaces the lose.

After the second I wanted to give up but again I wasn't ready to give up on having a baby.

So this is how we coped.

I lost my first at 12 weeks - found out at the 12 week scan. The grief was crippling for a while and I felt like I "should" have known something was wrong and that my body had failed me. I was also petrified that it meant I'd never be able to have a healthy baby. I found what helped was focussing on TTC again when I could and as it happens I got pregnant 3 months later and did have a healthy baby. After DD I subsequently lost another 5 plus 2 ectopics but none hurt as much as that first one. I think because up till that point I just thought I'd be like everyone else who get a BFP and start happily planning the future - every BFP after that was plagued in stress and anxiety that things would go wrong and the happiness was taken away from TTC.
Even now I'm 17 weeks with twins and I can't focus on the future yet

Hi ladies thank you for taking the time to come back to me and I'm sorry for your losses too. I think I'm still in shock and traumatised by the whole event yesterday, I went to the bathroom with what I thought was an upset stomach and saw blood then everything came away shortly after, it happened so quickly it was such a shock and I keep replaying it in my head. We will try again in a month or so, but I agree with @ivfbeenbusy in that I worry I will feel anxious it will happen again. Time is a healer I guess and just got to ride this emotional rollercoaster x

I can really relate to everyone on this forum and it is so healing to me. I had a routine scan on Sunday and everything was fine, heartbeat detected and bleeding was linked to a hematoma. Went for an nhs scan yesterday as they wanted to see me and thought nothing of it as bleeding had stopped and hematoma was away from the womb. The sonograoher was really quiet and I stupidly didn't think anything of it until she said she couldn't see a heartbeat. My baby died at 8 weeks. Turns out they were 2 separate things and the baby must have died after Sunday with a missed miscarriage. I felt numb and never thought I'd be leaving the clinic with some tablets. Life can be so cruel

@elane8701 I'm so sorry to hear this. I was Sunday as well and I'm just starting to feel human again. It's such a shock. I hope you're ok sending hugs and healing xx