Feeling like I can’t get through the next 9 weeks

[Anxiousgirl23]

I’m nearly 31 weeks with my first baby and the whole pregnancy has been a struggle. I’ve been relatively fortunate with physical symptoms but mentally I have really struggled with mixed feelings about my baby etc. I had anorexia as a teenager and am at a point where I’m starting to really despise the way I look even though I have a pretty small neat bump but I can’t tolerate the idea of getting any bigger and frankly just want my baby out of me now...

I hate people commenting on my appearance and being all enthusiastic (i know they’re just being nice) because I don’t feel like that. I’m just feeling really low and like I can’t go on any more. I’ve already spoken to my midwives and gp and they’ve referred me for support but honestly don’t feel like it’s going to make any difference to how I feel. I just feel out of control.

Has anyone else felt like this or is it just me as other people seem so happy about their pregnancies?

Hi OP

I’m sorry to hear that you’re feeling rough and like you’re struggling with the pregnancy. I’m 35 weeks and I’ve been feeling much the same throughout. I’ve had mixed feelings the whole way and the weight gain is something I’ve struggled with. I’ve been small all my life and suddenly seeing myself so much bigger has been really difficult. I’ve been quite emotional generally (to tell you the truth I’m not long off the phone to my boss in tears because I’m feeling so overwhelmed right now)

It’s really good that you’ve told your midwife and GP, and I really hope that you’re able to get some support, whether you feel that it makes a big difference or not, that’s a big step.

I don’t really have any words of advise to be honest, just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. I hope the last few weeks go quickly for you. I do believe that it’ll be worth it in the end and that’s what’s been getting me through.

I think having complex, mixed feelings about pregnancy and being a mum is much much more common than we’re lead to think.

All these bloody gender reveals and baby showers could make people presume pregnant women are just skipping about with joy all the time.. not true!!

In reality pregnancy is physically challenging, mentally exhausting, and can stir up a lot of mental stuff you may have thought you’d dealt with or been able to not think about for years. The hormonal changes and mood swings are so powerful, and it’s impossible to predict how pregnancy will be for any one person, until you get there.

I really hope you can have an honest chat with your midwife about how you feel, and ask for someone to talk to.

I recommend listening to Giovanna Fletcher‘S ‘happy mum happy baby’ podcast too. on many of the episodes they cover mental health issues and it certainly made me feel less weird and alone.

Xx

@Oreoreo thanks for replying and sorry to hear you have also been struggling. Wishing you all the best for the last few weeks.

@Gerdticker thanks for your reply. I think you’re right that a lot more people struggle than we are led to believe and social media definitely doesn’t help. Thanks for the podcast recommendation - i will have a listen to that. Xx

I felt exactly the same OP, despised my body changing, hated talking about it, I've always been small and petite and just felt like an alien or something was inside me.

Be kind to yourself, it's so tough and you are so close to the end now. As soon as I had my daughter I was so relieved to have my body back, I guess some people that love pregnancy will never understand that feeling. When people say they miss their bump I want to drop kick them !