10 Days to go, can't stop crying

[Carouselfish]

Anyone else? Have a whinge here!
I know it's hormones but that doesn't make me feel better about it!
Reasons for crying: A tractor charged towards me without slowing down, down a narrow track this morning, which left me all shaky and teary. Yesterday my DD (5) was back at school and she didn't smile when I picked her up as she wanted to stay longer as she loved it so much which made me feel like she hated me. Have tail end of a cold so can't breathe normally and coughing so hard I almost pee! (not covid, have had test) Feel like my driving has gone to shit. Oh and I'm having a c-section having had no surgery ever before so am somewhat convinced I might die. Am so stressed about getting house sorted before baby comes but have no energy to do it that am having nightmares about tidal waves of black bin bags!!!

Right. One thing at a time.

Your DD does not hate you. She loved her day at school and that is a GOOD thing. I adore gingerbread. Doesn't mean I hate lemon cheesecake. Repeat to yourself "I'm relieved she loves school so much" and move on.

Who is helping you at home? What needs doing? What is realistically achievable?

The CS will be fine. I've had two and had no experience of surgery. Honestly, you're just worrying because it's the unknown. Let the medical staff do their jobs. Concentrate on what you can control. Which snacks do you want to take? Have you got some lovely hand cream/face spritz/cordial for the ward? Plan for the stuff you can control, trust the professionals for the stuff you can't.

Screw the tractor driver.

Most importantly, sit down, drink and eat and let your body heal. All that other stuff will come out in the wash. You're going to be fine. Promise.

You have brought up a well adjusted DD who has settled well into school, huge result!!

I hadn’t had surgery before my CS and it is a bit scary. Every anaesthetist I have ever met (5 now) have been so incredibly kind. They sit with you all the way through. The spinal does the job brilliantly and there isn't pain. You can feel things are happening but it’s fine and it doesn’t take long until your baby appears, the sewing up bit takes longer but you don’t give a shit by that point as you have your baby to focus on.

Agree on just focusing on getting well for now.

How are you now?

Thank you so much for replies. Very kind. You're right, I don't like not being in control of things. Think exhaustion and hormones and knowing I can't do what I want to the house now (and while healing) has just got on top of me. Up til last week I was sanding and painting and lugging stuff to the tip. DP at work and does help at weekend but useless at throwing things away!

I had a c-section with my DS as he was breech and I'd never had any kind of surgery before... it was perfect and I was so glad I had it I've opted for it again with this DC.

It's OK to feel like this OP, hormones and late-third-trimester pregnancy are a f##king nightmare... it will be over in less than a week

Do some nice things for yourself. Even just 2o mins. A walk, a bath, writing down positive things, reading positive quotes, calling a friend. Have an early night. Be kind to you