Pregnancy after late pregnancy/baby loss

[lionsmum]

Hi everyone,

I know it's a bit of a niche subject title so I'm not sure how many (if any) replies I will get to this, but I was just looking for support from mums who have experienced pregnancy after a late pregnancy/still birth/neonatal loss. I lost my son neonatally just over a year ago and am currently 25 weeks pregnant with my second & feeling incredibly grateful for it. I'm starting to let myself think ahead to bringing this little one home and how it will feel. I'm anxious about meeting this baby and the feelings it will bring. And being a second time first time mum, since I never really got to 'mother' my first son as it were. Wondering what the first few nights at home will be like and how it will feel to bring a living baby home? Any support or experience would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you x

Hi @lionsmum

Not quite the same as you but I lost my DD at 17 months and currently 17 weeks PG with number 2. Feels very strange how I'm going through it all again as a second time mum but really my lifestyle is that of a FTM! Obviously more anxious etc too.. think the chances of something going wrong seem so distant until they happen to you.

Hope you've managed to relax in this pregnancy and fingers crossed for a smooth ride this time around x

@IronMummy28 thank you so much for your reply, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your DD & congratulations on your pregnancy💖 it's so strange having a child but having the lifestyle of someone with no kids as you put it, it's very hard to describe to others who haven't experienced it! It's hard to join in on the usual baby conversations because you don't really fit into a category of FTM or second with one at home already.

Thankfully everything so far seems to be going well, just hoping it stays that way. How are you getting on?x

Hi @lionsmum,

I lost my firstborn neonatally back in 2009 - he was born at 25 weeks and his body just wasn't ready, he was 3 weeks old when he passed.
I had number 2, 3 years later and had lots of extra tests/scans etc so felt pretty confident that all would be OK this time, athough I'm not sure whether I ever really let myself believe it would happen until probably about week 30! Your anxious feelings will disappear as soon as you see baby. You may have some emotional moments no doubt....but I'm sure you will be just fine. I'm not ashamed to say my 2nd has been a bit spoiled over the years maybe because of the loss or maybe I'm just a soft touch!

Good luck in your pregnancy

Thank you for your reply @AlbertCookie and I'm so sorry to read about the loss of your DS. Having a baby in the NICU environment instead of being able to bring them home is the strangest thing, but I feel like that's all I know now. I can feel we will be the same with this little one, a bit more of a pushover, but it makes you appreciate them that bit more when you know what it's like to lose a child. I'm equally excited and nervous, sometimes more nervous than excited of course but it does come and go. Nervous about that feeling of holding them for the first time and not being able to let go! I don't want to be too protective but feel I'll struggle with that. Sorry, I'm rambling😅 will take it slow, one week at a time. Thank you for sharing💖

@lionsmum hello ladies,
Sorry for your losses.
Even my story is of similar I lost my baby boy at 20th week. It was MMC and reasons are unknown,
If everything was alright I would ve given birth in this month but co incidentally I am 4 weeks pregnant now.
It took me 4 cycles of TTC, I am still very anxious and still very scared about every sitting lying position. Practically I know it's too early but I can afford to loss this baby at any cost. It took terrible nights and days to accept and grieve and I am still mourning about the loss!!
Definitely pregnancy after late loss is not as exciting as it sounds!!
Fingers crossed for all of us 🤞🤞

Can't afford to lose!! Typo it was