Advice on partners previous situation

[lostguy92]

Short story, my current partner had a child when she was quite young and was left to parent by herself.. social services became involved, she had her child taken away under “child abuse”, as a mark was found or something. She said she didlt do anything which I do completely believe. And she is still in regular contact with her child to this day, But because of what happened many years ago we are worried if we have a child together in the future, is there a possibility of our child being taken away?? Any advice welcome. Thanks

Social services do not remove children because of ‘a mark’. Children are left in horribly neglectful homes because they don’t meet the threshold for removal. I don’t think your partner is being honest with you or maybe there is some misunderstanding about what actually happened.

I believe she can request her previous file.
You owe it to yourself and any future children to find out the real truth.

Agree, social services need clear evidence of abuse before they remove a child. Your partner needs to be honest with you before you even consider having a child together.

Thank you for the above comments. From my understanding there was a burn mark on the child which was Supposedly caused by the mother.. I don’t know the ins and outs but will ask.

Would this effect me if having a child together? What would happen? Thanks, I’m just curious as I know that’s what she wants in the future. Not yet..

Social services need good reason to remove a child, repeated neglect - leaving a child alone, in danger, unfed etc - or repeated signs of injury that cannot be explained, and a court order.
There would have been social services involvement over a long period - providing support, advice, access to classes etc - before removal, or the injuries would have been severe and blatantly intentional for them to act quickly.

If your partner has another baby, SS might remove that child, or insist that you live separately from your dp and have 100% care.
You need to know exactly what happened, understand what your partner’s issues were and if they are likely to recur, and talk to a family solicitor about the likely outcome BEFORE you try for a baby.
If your dp cannot talk to you openly and in detail about what happened, she is probably not in a good place to try again.

As above, this is relevant to the field i work in and there is 0 chance a judge would approve removal of a child without there being significant concerns. One mark, no matter how serious, is unlikely to alone suggest removal of a child. The process is long and drawn out and also, so so many children are left in homes where there is obvious neglect or abuse because the threshold for removal is so high. despite what people may say about social workers it is always a last resort too - they will explore parenting classes, mental health or practical support, fostering or homing within the family before removal of the child. I would suggest if you start discussing children that you request to review her social services file, with her, so you can both understand what went wrong before and ensure there are no similar concerns in the future. I would also suggest using a form of contraceptive that you are in control of eg condoms until you know for sure what happened in the past. If the allegations were so serious that the child was adopted and you were to have a child that was also removed, there is every chance that you would then need social services involvement for any children you have in future too, whether with her or another partner.

I know of children who were removed from family home for burn marks. Removed same day, placed into foster care.
Case went to court, eventually
Perpetrator sent to prison. (Short sentence)
Children now back in family home after a LOT of support and intervention.

So I would also urge you to find out the details of your partner's case.
And I would expect to have SS involved if she ever got pregnant again, at the very least monitoring you both/all strongly. Particularly after a baby is born