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Second baby guilt?

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nattynoo85 · 24/07/2020 10:13

Hi everyone,

I am 19 weeks pregnant with my second child which will hopefully be our rainbow baby after a miscarriage and ectopic. Although I’m very happy I also feel extremely sad for my first born who is turning 4 in September. My son is showing signs of the pending arrival of a baby brother or sister affecting him already. My son said to me one morning, when I’m a big brother I won’t be perfect anymore and I won’t be able to play games..... it broke my heart. My son also said I’m worried about mummy’s tummy when baby comes. It’s made me worry about the risk to my health during birth. It’s got me thinking of so many things I didn’t have while trying for a baby and at the beginning of this pregnancy.

My son has such a happy and sweet nature. Always smiling and very affectionate. He loves being with people and love stalking away. He’s such a delight. And I was desperate to give him a sibling, a friend for life. But now I feel so guilty that I’m going to change his life forever and possible his sweet little nature. I don’t want him to feel second best or be jealous of the baby. I feel so sad already for being useless with the baby bump in tow and having to take it really easy during my pregnancy due to previous loss. That when I will be able to be normal again I will have a baby and have to divide my time. I feel so guilty my son won’t have my 100% attention like he normally does.

Is this guilt normal? Is it normal to feel so sad with your second pregnancy but also happy?

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